[Copypasta] Jeff Bezos vs Elon Musk

Jeff Bezos -Bald -Exwife took half his networth -Second richest person Elon Musk -Grew back full head of hair -Has girlfriend, allegedly had a threesome with Amber Heard and Cara Delevingne -Richest person TSLA > AMZN
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

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i think its hilarious u kids talking shit about reynad

twitchquotes: i think its hilarious u kids talking shit about reynad. u wouldnt say this shit to him at lan, hes jacked. not only that but he wears the freshest clothes, eats at the chillest restaurants and hangs out with the hottest dudes. yall are pathetic lol.
twitch chat
August 2016
Reynad

Classic

I sexually identify as an Attack Helicopter

I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm *** retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
November 2014

Classic

I sexually Identify as

Handsome Squidward

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠤⠖⠊⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠲⢤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡤⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠱⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠈⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡆⡜⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⡂⠀⠇⠱⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢄⡀⢠⣟⢭⣥⣤⠽⡆⠀⡶⣊⣉⣲⣤⢀⡞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠐⠂⠘⠄⣈⣙⡡⡴⠀⠀⠙⣄⠙⣛⠜⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠄⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⡸⠛⠀⠀⠀⢸⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠓⠦⢄⣘⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠀⠀⠀⠀⣇⡀⠀⠀⣠⠎⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠁⠈⡟⠒⠲⣄⠀⠀⡰⠇⠖⢄⠀⠀⡹⡇⢀⠎⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡇⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠹⠀⡞⠀⠀⢀⠤⣍⠭⡀⢱⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣠⠞⠀⠀⢠⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⢴⠥⠤⠦⠦⡼⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣀⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠋⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⣠⢤⠐⠁⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠬⠥⣄⠀⠀⠈⠲⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠦⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢳⠀⠀⢀⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠒⠦⠤⢤⣄⣀⣠⠤⢿⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡼⠁⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀
February 2021

Classic

Navy Seal

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
April 2019

Classic

Navy Seal

If any of you copy and paste this you will be in serious trouble

twitchquotes: ᶦ ˢʷᵉᵃʳ ᵗᵒ ᵍᵒᵈ ᶦᶠ ᵃᶰʸ ᵒᶠ ʸᵒᵘ ᵐᵒᵗʰᵉʳʳᶠᵘᶜᵏᵉʳˢ ᶜᵒᵖʸ ᵃᶰᵈ ᵖᵃˢᵗᵉ ᵗʰᶦˢ ʸᵒᵘ ʷᶦᶫᶫ ᵇᵉ ᶦᶰ ˢᵉʳᶦᵒᵘˢ ᵗʳᵒᵘᵇᶫᵉ
twitch chat
April 2014

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing