[Copypasta] Jeff Bezos vs Elon Musk

Jeff Bezos -Bald -Exwife took half his networth -Second richest person Elon Musk -Grew back full head of hair -Has girlfriend, allegedly had a threesome with Amber Heard and Cara Delevingne -Richest person TSLA > AMZN
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

I used to be a real ad
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A girl... AND a gamer?

A girl.... AND a gamer? Whoa mama! Hummina hummina hummina bazooooooooing! *eyes pop out* AROOOOOOOOGA! *jaw drops tongue rolls out* WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF *tongue bursts out of the outh uncontrollably leaking face and everything in reach* WURBLWUBRLBWURblrwurblwurlbrwubrlwburlwbruwrlblwublr *tiny cupid shoots an arrow through heart* Ahhhhhhhhhhh me lady... *heart in the shape of a heart starts beating so hard you can see it through shirt* ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum *milk truck crashes into a bakery store in the background spiling white liquid and dough on the streets* BABY WANTS TO FUCK *inhales from the gas tank* honka honka honka honka *masturabtes furiously* ohhhh my gooooodd~
March 2021

Classic

Greggnog

First off: I am not joking. I wish I was joking. I've been with my wonderful boyfriend Greg for over 4 years now, and this Christmas was our third spent together. He's so much fun to be around, handsome, charming, and our sex life is great. Except for one small problem. Every year now starting in December he starts referring to his cum as "Greggnog." When I first heard him say this, it was in the context of a joke, so I laughed, and then I forgot about it. A few days after this, we're exchanging some spicy texts before he gets home from work he says to me, in all seriousness, "I can't wait to pour Greggnog all over your face." I could not believe he just said that to me, but I didn't know what else to do at the time but go along with it. Fast forward to this December. This phrase re-enters his vocabulary at the same time every year. It makes me cringe beyond belief, but until this year he used it sparingly enough for me to just be able to laugh and say "shut the fuck up." I'm sure that 2020 has done at least some irreparable psychic damage to all people, but unfortunately, for my boyfriend, this has manifested in the form of him referring to his cum as "Greggnog" non-stop. This month he has been using the term almost exclusively, in all contexts, and it is driving me batshit insane. I sat him down to talk last week, and I asked him very clearly and directly to stop. At the time, he said he would, and it did slow down for a few days, but it is now four days after Christmas and he's back at it again with no end in sight. He absolutely means the world to me, and I saw myself spending the rest of my life with him, but I have serious doubts now whether or not I can if every Christmas is going to be like this. So please, reddit, what do I do to make this stop for good?
December 2020

Classic

That's some good shit right there

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘€ good shit goเฑฆิ sHit๐Ÿ‘Œ thats โœ” some good๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œshit right๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œth ๐Ÿ‘Œ ere๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ rightโœ”there โœ”โœ”if i do ฦฝaาฏ so my sel๏ฝ† ๐Ÿ’ฏ i say so ๐Ÿ’ฏ thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: สณแถฆแตสฐแต— แต—สฐแต‰สณแต‰) mMMMMแŽทะœ๐Ÿ’ฏ ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ‘ŒะO0ะžเฌ ๏ผฏOO๏ผฏOะžเฌ เฌ Ooooแต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ’ฏ ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘ŒGood shit
twitch chat
September 2015

Emoji Pasta

Classic

Now Playing: Despacito

twitchquotes: ษดแดแดก แด˜สŸแด€สษชษดษข: Despacito โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โšชโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ—„โ—„โ €โ–โ– โ €โ–บโ–บโ €โ € โ € 1:17 / 3:48 โ € โ”€โ”€โ”€โ—‹ ๐Ÿ”Šโ € แดดแดฐ โš™ โ โŠโА
twitch chat
August 2018

Classic

What is inside that taco? Oh no it's REYNAD

twitchquotes: TBTacoLeft TBCheesePull TBTacoRight WHAT IS INSIDE THAT TACO TBTacoLeft PJSalt TBTacoRight OH NO IT'S REYNAD
twitch chat
April 2016
Reynad

Classic

salty

Text-to-Speech Playing