[Copypasta] This message legally certifies that I was here

twitchquotes: This message marks my place as a viewer at this moment, and hereby certifies that I "was here" for any and all subsequent significant events in the near future. This message contains no other particular information, and does not imply any endorsement of, nor involvement in, the events which occur. This message is signed by Twitch authentication and dated by chatroom timestamp, and hence is legally binding.
twitch chat
February 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer

Hey, quandale Pringle here, My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer during work and he squeezed my hog so hard and wouldn't even stop after I banned him. My brother Cornelius Bartholomew Anderson ringle got caught in an alberian twitch prime and bits scam and got sent to the gulag, but we've snuck him a Nokia 3310 in his ass with a spoon that he'll be using to plan a breakout with my cousin longsdale dimmsdimone slingle.
July 2022

Did you ever hear the tragedy of the man who fell into the river in Lego city?

Did you ever hear the tragedy of the man who fell into the river in Lego city? I thought not. It's not a story the Playmobils would tell you. It's a LEGO legend. Man Lego was a Dark Lord of building, so powerful and so wise he could use the bricks to influence the constructions to create rescue helicopters… He had such a knowledge of building that he could even keep the ones he cared about from falling. The dark side of the LEGOs is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice threw him into the river in LEGO city. Ironic. He could rescue others from the river, but not himself.
December 2020

Lego City

Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise

Hey, Vsauce, Michael here!

Hey, Vsauce, Michael here! Down here. But which way is down? And how much does down weigh? Well, down weighs about 1/100 of a g/cm3 . It is light, and airy, which makes it a great source of insulation and buoyancy for waterbirds. But if you let go of down, it falls down. So that's which way down is, it's the direction that gravity is pulling everything. Now for someone on the other side of the Earth, my down is their up, but where are falling things going? Why do things fall? Are they being pushed or pulled? Or, is it because of TIME TRAVEL.
March 2020

Fortnite default dance 5

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣤⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣤⣶⣶⠶⠛⠉⠉ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠛⣿⣤⣤⣀⣤⠿⠉⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣛⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠛⠿⣿⣿⣶⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠿⣶⣤⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣿⣿⠿⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠉⠉⠀
November 2018

Fortnite Default Dance

Fortnite

Can you take it easy with your complaints about Flamestrike?

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp. Can you take it easy with your complaints about Flamestrike? My friend is a developer at Blizzard and he invented Flamestrike. He has been getting spam letters in the mail threatening to "brofist" him. These spammers claim to be "insane" and "crazy" and "have exactly what they need to beat him." I am worried for him, please help. Thanks man.
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing