[Copypasta] This message legally certifies that I was here

twitchquotes: This message marks my place as a viewer at this moment, and hereby certifies that I "was here" for any and all subsequent significant events in the near future. This message contains no other particular information, and does not imply any endorsement of, nor involvement in, the events which occur. This message is signed by Twitch authentication and dated by chatroom timestamp, and hence is legally binding.
twitch chat
February 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Hello gentleman, I have suffered a loss of 69K

Hello gentleman, I regretfully wish to share with you all that I shant comment on this Internet forum henceforth. As of the time of my arrival in this past autumn, I have suffered a loss of 69K. By the blessing of Lady Luck, I am still experiencing a positive net balance of 420%, so I have come to the conclusion I must liquidate my insignificant phallus account. I shall use this fortune for procuring a vaginal enlargement and acquire tremendous breasts for my OnlyAristocracy parchment. Or I may be devilish and maintain an investment position in TournamentCease. I am short of hours of leisure in life, training dogs to consume peanut butter from the reaches of my posterior and can not bare the rapid change of value of my investment holdings of 40 point 7 grand. I am aware that you, my peers of this financial derivatives Internet forum are filled with ecstasy to become privy to this, so copulate with yourself, I desire you all to be ablaze in nonheteronormative ursine hell in tandem with Sadam.
March 2021

WallStreetBets

President's Day Emoji Pasta PresiDICK's Day

Happy PresiDICK’S 🍆🍌🌽 DAY‼️ Time ⏰⏰ to honor the DADDIES 👬👬 of our nation 🇺🇸🇺🇸 George SLUTsington 👯👯, Benjamin SPANKlin👋🍑, John HanCOCK 🍆🌽💦💦💦 These POUNDING 🔨⚒ fathers ERECTED ⬆️⬆️ their 😻📃CUNTstitutional dongs 😍🍌for LADY LIBERTY 🗽👅🙀 Raise that ASS 🍑 to 💦💦 Abraham LinCUM 💦💦, 🌲 WOODrow Wilson 😏🌲😉, Bill CLIT-on 👌👈, and the CUMmander in chief, 👦🍆👀BarCOCK Obama 👦🍆👀 Don’t forget Dwight D. EisenWHORE 👀😩 DICKlared war 🔫💣 on those CUMMIES 💦💂💂 Share in ♋️ SUCKonds or you won’t be pounding 🔨that presidential PUSSY 🙀🙀 Get 5️⃣ back and ur a White House HOE 🏠 Get 🔟 back and ur the SUCKretary of state 📔😙🇺🇸 Get 20 back and the First Lady will make u moan 😩😩💦💦💦💦💦 HAPPY JIZZIDENT’S DAY!! Hail to the CHEEKS 🍑🍑🍑
February 2024

President's Day

Emoji Pasta

Holiday Emoji

Globglogabgalab

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠠⡄⢠⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣰⣿⢡⣶⣼⣿⡿⠋⠙⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣇⢋⠀⢻⡟⠐⠻⣇⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⣟⣛⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⠛⠛⣶⣾⣠⣅⣀⣽⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡄⠀⣯⣭⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣦⢠⣿⡟⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣻⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⡟⣿⡿⠁⠀⢶⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠈⠁⢀⡤⣄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣺⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⡀⣠⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢈⡓⣦⠀ ⠀⠐⠋⠛⠉⠙⣿⣿⣯⡉⠉⠙⠳⢿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⡏⠁⠈⠉⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣾⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠇⠀
September 2021

Toast stares at the screen

twitchquotes: Toast stares at the screen. His vision begins to fade. "My jaws that bite, my claws that catch". This message burns into his brain. As the armor count slowly rises, Toast's sanity begins to fade. "Just another 1000 armor, then I can quit" he tells himself. His viewers are begging him to stop, it's been weeks and weeks at this point, As he finally begins to succumb to his fatigue and eye strain, he realizes this is the end. He utters one final word, as falls face down onto his desk. "...PogChamp.
twitch chat
December 2018
DisguisedToast

Hearthstone

Pick up the sock

twitchquotes: PICK UP THE SOCK OR THE DOG GETS IT (⌐■_■)=/̵͇̿̿/'̿'̿̿̿ ̿ ̿̿ FrankerZ
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad
Text-to-Speech Playing