[Copypasta] This message legally certifies that I was here

twitchquotes: This message marks my place as a viewer at this moment, and hereby certifies that I "was here" for any and all subsequent significant events in the near future. This message contains no other particular information, and does not imply any endorsement of, nor involvement in, the events which occur. This message is signed by Twitch authentication and dated by chatroom timestamp, and hence is legally binding.
twitch chat
February 2022
I used to be a real ad
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Fall Guys

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⢀⣠⣶⣶⣶⣶⣤⡀⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⣾⡿⢿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⡆⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠄⠄⢿⣇⣸⣿⣿⣇⣸⡿⠃⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⢠⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣧⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿ ⣿⣿⣇⠄⣰⣶⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣶⣆⠄⢀⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⠄⢸⣿⠇⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣴⣾⣿⣶⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
August 2020

Willy Vegansaurus the Herbivorous Dinosaur

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, this is Willy Vegansaurus the Herbivorous Dinosaur from 194 B.C .... I came to warn you about the extinction of Herbivores and the 'never lucky' curse it bestows on us. Kripp, you must eat meat immediately! If you don't, a giant "MEAT-EOR" will crash into earth and extinct us all... again... Us Herbivores were wrong. WE WERE WRONG! WutFace
twitch chat
April 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
May 2021

If you can press ctrl+v you can have dongers anytime!

twitchquotes: ᕕ┌◕ᗜ◕┐ᕗ Dongers in the morning, dongers in the evening, dongers at suppertime. If you can press ctrl+v you can have dongers anytime! ᕕ┌◕ᗜ◕┐ᕗ
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

I sexually identify as a single Pringle

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as a single, Pringle, ready to mingle. Ever since I was a potato I dreamed of being thin sliced, covered in disgusting oil then heated in a medium oven until reaching climax at the micro second of golden-browness. People bully me, and say things like "what the fuck, you aren't a Pringle", but I know deep down they are just jealous of my inner beauty.
twitch chat
March 2015

I sexually Identify as

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