[Copypasta] This message legally certifies that I was here

twitchquotes: This message marks my place as a viewer at this moment, and hereby certifies that I "was here" for any and all subsequent significant events in the near future. This message contains no other particular information, and does not imply any endorsement of, nor involvement in, the events which occur. This message is signed by Twitch authentication and dated by chatroom timestamp, and hence is legally binding.
twitch chat
February 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
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A SIMP HAS FALLEN FOR AN E-GIRL IN LEGO CITY

A SIMP HAS FALLEN FOR AN E-GIRL IN LEGO CITY HEY! CONSTRUCT THE THOT PATROL AND LOCK HER UP (BEGONE THOT) NEW THOT PATROL FROM LEGO CITY setsandaccessory'ssoldseperatly *Belle Delphine squeals*
December 2020

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Simps

YOU CAME TO THE WRONG CIRCUS

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜◯ ( ͡° ͜◯ ( ͡° ͜◯ ͡°) YOU CAME TO THE WRONG CIRCUS ( ͡° ͜◯ ( ͡° ͜◯ ( ͡° ͜◯ ͡°)
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June 2015
Forsen

I enjoy the Kar98k.

twitchquotes: I enjoy the Kar98k. It is my favorite weapon in PUBG. When I get a headshot, I think to myself ”yes”. When I get shot in the head, I think to myself ”no”.
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January 2018

PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds

TSM AKA "Throws Six Matches"

twitchquotes: TSM AKA "Throws Six Matches" is a North American team known for their questionable play and inability to win a game. They are currently found in Gate 06 of the Shanghai Pudong Airport making up excuses for not winning a single game at Worlds.
twitch chat
October 2020
Riot Games

League of Legends

Wife wants to leave me because of an NFT diamond ring

My wife loves new technology and is into cryptocurrency and so I thought it would be thoughtful to buy her a diamond ring as a NFT. I spent about 3 ETH which is like $12000 CAD. So when she got home from work I told her I had a surprise for her. I put a blindfold on my wife and guided her into our room where our computer is set up. Soon as she opened her eyes and saw what it was, she absolutely exploded with rage saying I was an asshole and was only thinking about myself. She then accused me of spending money on stupid thing and said she’s going to go find a boyfriend. I don’t know what to do in this situation. I was only thinking about HER interests and how happy she would be to receive this new technology. Plus the price of her ring will only appreciate. Stupid real diamonds only depreciate. We have now signed up for NFT relationship counselling. I have been seeking relationship advice but everyone says to buy her NFT flowers or NFT chocolates. And when I did that, that was the last straw. Wife sent me divorce papers and I converted it into NFT. I know in the long run when all these NFT’s moon. She will come crawling back.
February 2022
Text-to-Speech Playing