[Copypasta] This message legally certifies that I was here

twitchquotes: This message marks my place as a viewer at this moment, and hereby certifies that I "was here" for any and all subsequent significant events in the near future. This message contains no other particular information, and does not imply any endorsement of, nor involvement in, the events which occur. This message is signed by Twitch authentication and dated by chatroom timestamp, and hence is legally binding.
twitch chat
February 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Stimulus hopes in the year is 2025

The year is 2025. House speaker Nancy pelosi's brain jar has agreed with Mitch McConnell's new human skinbody to vote on the $12 covid stimulus package. This is the 37th revision to the package initially introduced in late 2020. One dollar will be split between all americans, two between all illegal immigrants, and the rest to Jeff bezos. Due to stimulus hopes, SPY has rallied to 600.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Fantastic AoE2 player

twitchquotes: "Streamer's name" is a fantastic player, he only needs to work on his scoutings, build orders, strategy choices, eco management, army compositions, control groupings, unit splits, xbow dances, mangonel attack grounds, monk micros, knights surroundings, galley fights, laming, clicking precision, building placements, not getting housed, map bans and civ choices.
twitch chat
July 2020

Age of Empires II

forsenDDK

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢿⣿⡿⢿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡻⢹⣯⣔⢄⠦⠄⡐⠰⠈⡭⠾⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣳⡟⢟⣛⠵⠁⠂⠄⠄⠄⠈⠁⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠊⠄⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠈⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠸⠇⠄⠘⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⡤⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣢⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣈⣀⠄⠄⠄⣰⡠⡀⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣷⡄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣾⡟⠿⡿⠟⡌⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⣠⣾⠿⠿⠿⠷⠄⠄⢘⡆⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⢿⠇⠄⢠⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠓⢦⣺⡟⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣦⠄⢀⡈⠛⢹⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡶⠾⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣄⠄⠂⠄⠈⠂⠄⠁⠄⡀⢂⣶⣾⣿⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣭⣛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

your streams lately have really helped me

twitchquotes: hey [streamer], your streams lately have really helped me with my depression, bleakness, dejection, distress, sorrow, my car trouble, my 401k, my grades, my slimp dick, my underperforming AMD driver, the armenian genocide, the galloping campaign, the war in the vietnamese, oh god they are in the trees, the battle of antietam, the housing crisis of 2008, the bankruptcy of greece in 2015, the explosion of chernobyl, my late grandma denise
twitch chat
December 2020

I’m struggling to accept religious people as human (/r/atheism parody)

This has been growing in me for a while, but the more I see what’s going on in africa and the middle east, and all the bullshit around the world in the name of religion, I’ve gotten to a point where I’m looking at all religious people as not even human. I don’t know if I quite see them as livestock or wild animals or whatever, but it’s pretty close to it. I still don’t understand why people say to respect other people’s religious beliefs. I certainly don’t. I actually think religious beliefs should be mocked, ripped apart, criticized relentlessly, and actually probably be made illegal. I hope to see a future where believers are looked at as mentally ill and mentally retarded, who need to be locked up and treated, or sent to jail. I’m just so disgusted by all of them.
June 2021
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