[Copypasta] This message legally certifies that I was here

twitchquotes: This message marks my place as a viewer at this moment, and hereby certifies that I "was here" for any and all subsequent significant events in the near future. This message contains no other particular information, and does not imply any endorsement of, nor involvement in, the events which occur. This message is signed by Twitch authentication and dated by chatroom timestamp, and hence is legally binding.
twitch chat
February 2022
I used to be a real ad
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I sexually Identify as going second

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as going second. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of being at a mana disadvantage for ten turns. People say to me that a winning when going second is Impossible and I’m *** retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install four cards in my opening hand as well as the coin on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “UNKNOWN” and respect my right to instantly lose the majority of games. If you can’t accept me you’re a turn-twophobe
twitch chat
December 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

I, an atheist, accidentally said “oh my g*d” instead of “oh my science”

I, an atheist, accidentally said “oh my g*d” instead of “oh my science” You read the title, I just cannot believe I said the “g” word on accident. Am I even an atheist anymore? I don’t like religion or anything but like maybe it infiltrated me and is manipulating me to say “oh my g*d” instead of “oh my science”. Please guys it wasn’t me, I didn’t mean it. I’m very disappointed in myself, I think I need to go to science camp or go to therapy. What if I’m secretly religious? what should I do? Is my foreskin going to fall off?? Please can someone give me advice, any advice is appreciated. Best regards, -an atheist(?)
November 2020

I want to sleep with you. No, i dont mean have sex

twitchquotes: I want to sleep with you. No, i dont mean have sex. I mean sleep. Together. Under a blanket. In your bed. While your laying on my arm with my other hand on your tummy. With the window cracked, so its chilly and we have to cuddle closer. No talking, just the muffled cries.
twitch chat
February 2019

Not your naked body

Yer in proper mess ya nob head

twitchquotes: ᴜ ᴡᴏᴛ ᴍ8? ɪ sᴡᴇʀ ᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ᴏɴᴇ ᴄʜᴇᴇᴋʏ ᴄᴜɴᴛ ᴍᴀᴛᴇ, sᴀʏ ɪᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴍʏ ғᴀᴄᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ᴏɴʟɪɴᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴇ'ʟʟ sᴇᴇ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʜᴀᴘᴘᴇɴs. ɪ sᴡᴇʀ 2 ᴄʜʀɪsᴛ I'ʟʟ ʜᴏᴏᴋ ʏᴏᴜ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ɢᴀʙʙᴀ. ʏᴏᴜ ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ sʜᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴍᴏᴜᴛʜ ᴏʀ ɪᴍ ᴄᴀʟʟɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ʜᴏᴍᴇʙᴏʏs ʀɪᴛᴇ ɴᴏᴡ ᴘʀᴇᴘᴀʀɪɴ ғᴏʀ ᴀ ᴘʀᴏᴘᴇʀ ʀᴜᴍʙʟᴇ. ᴛʜᴀ ʀᴜᴍʙʟᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛʟʟ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɴᴀɴ sᴏʀᴇ ᴊᴜs ʜᴇᴀʀɪɴ ʙᴏᴜᴛ ɪᴛ. ʏᴇʀ ɪɴ ᴘʀᴏᴘᴇʀ ᴍᴇss ʏᴀ ɴᴏʙ ʜᴇᴀᴅ.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Don Han'Cho tells Kripp to disenchant his collection

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp its Don Han'Cho SMOrc SMOrc from da grimy goons. I got a job for yah. I know about a warehouse holding thousands of pounds of arcane dust. I got a tip that this place is called "collecteen manajaire" sounds french or somethin I don know. Anyways what I want you to do is da sneak in to dis place and look for a button called "deez ench ant". You whack dat and da goons will take care of da rest. You game?
twitch chat
December 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

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