[Copypasta] This message legally certifies that I was here

twitchquotes: This message marks my place as a viewer at this moment, and hereby certifies that I "was here" for any and all subsequent significant events in the near future. This message contains no other particular information, and does not imply any endorsement of, nor involvement in, the events which occur. This message is signed by Twitch authentication and dated by chatroom timestamp, and hence is legally binding.
twitch chat
February 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Do you have what it takes to be a Memester?

slow claps steps out of the shadows Heh... not bad, kid. Not bad at all. Your meme, I mean. It's not bad. A good first attempt. It's plenty dank... I can tell it's got some thought behind it... lots of quotable material... But memeing isn't all sunshine and rainbows, kid. You're skilled... that much I can tell. But do you have what it takes to be a Memester? To join those esteemed meme ranks? To call yourself a member of the Ruseman's Corps? Memeing takes talent, that much is true. But more than that it takes heart. The world-class Memesters - I mean the big guys, like Johnny Hammersticks and Billy Kuahana - they're out there day and night, burning the midnight meme-oil, working tirelessly to craft that next big meme. And you know what, kid? 99 times out of a hundred, that new meme fails. Someone dismisses it as bait, or says it's "tryhard," or ignores it as they copy/paste the latest shitpost copypasta dreamt up by those sorry excuses for cut-rate memers over at reddit. The Meme Game is rough, kid, and I don't just mean the one you just lost :). It's a rough business, and for every artisan meme you craft in your meme bakery, some cocksucker at 9gag has a picture of a duck or some shit that a million different Johnny No-Names will attach a milion different captions to. Chin up, kid. Don't get all mopey on me. You've got skill. You've got talent. You just need to show your drive. See you on the boards...
June 2017

I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of being misplayed during tournaments and silencing the incorrect cards. People say to me that a person being an owl is ridiculous and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a genetic engineer put ironbeak owl DNA into my body, equipping me with feathers, beaks, and the power to silence others. From now on I want you guys to call me "Owlsen" and respect my right to silence from above and silence needlessly. If you can't accept me you're an owlphobe and need to check your animal privilege. Thank you for understanding.
twitch chat
March 2015

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

NA COMING THROUGH

twitchquotes: NA COMING THROUGH β™Ώ GO TO SCHOOL RISK LIFE β™Ώ 10 IQ PRESIDENT β™Ώ GETTING MY SISTER PREGNANT β™Ώ WALL β™Ώ THINK THEY SAVED WORLD WAR β™Ώ NA EDUCATION β™Ώ GOVERNMENT SO BAD HAD TO SHUT DOWN
twitch chat
February 2019

EU vs NA

You have been permanently banned from this channel

twitchquotes: β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€” imGlitch You have been permanently banned from this channel. Please review the Twitch Terms of Service for more information. β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”
twitch chat
June 2017

Kripp drained Greece's entire supply of Oranges

twitchquotes: οΌ«ο½’ο½‰ο½ο½οΌŒ its Stavros ο½”ο½ˆο½… Fruit οΌ³ο½…ο½Œο½Œο½…ο½’ from the bazaar. I'm sorry to ο½”ο½…ο½Œο½Œ you but you've ο½„ο½’ο½ο½‰ο½Žο½…ο½„ Greece's ο½…ο½Žο½”ο½‰ο½’ο½… ο½“ο½•ο½ο½ο½Œο½™ of οΌ―ο½’ο½ο½Žο½‡ο½…ο½“οΌŽ 2ecause of ο½”ο½ˆο½… ο½’ο½‰ο½ο½”ο½‰ο½Žο½‡ on ο½”ο½ˆο½… streets ο½—ο½… advise you to ο½ˆο½‰ο½„ο½… ο½ο½Žο½™ οΌ―οΌͺ ο½“ο½•ο½ο½ο½Œο½™ you ο½ο½‰ο½‡ο½ˆο½” ο½ˆο½ο½–ο½… ο½Œο½…ο½†ο½”οΌŽ οΌ·ο½… ο½ƒο½ο½Ž ο½Žο½ο½— ο½ο½Žο½Œο½™ ο½“ο½…ο½Œο½Œ you οΌ―ο½Œο½‰ο½–ο½… οΌͺuice ο½ο½Žο½„ ο½”ο½ˆο½… odd ο½Šο½ο½’ of οΌ΄ο½šο½ο½”ο½šο½‰ο½‹ο½‰οΌŽ οΌ°ο½Œο½…ο½ο½“ο½… no gyro ο½ο½•ο½šο½
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing