About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
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More Copypastas
I see someone lost I spam C9
twitchquotes:
I'm in bronze everything is fine I see someone lose I spam C9
I'm in bronze everything is fine I see someone lose I spam C9
twitch chat
Overwatch
A NUCLEAR REACTOR HAS EXPLODED IN LEGO CITY
A NUCLEAR REACTOR HAS EXPLODED IN LEGO CITY
START THE EMERGENCY HELICOPTERS
HEY
BUILD THE HELICOPTERS, THROW BORON INTO THE REACTOR AND STOP THE DISASTER
THE NEW CHERNOBYL COLLECTION FROM LEGO CITY
Lego City
Kripp saved my life; Rania saved my sanity
twitchquotes:
I discovered Kripp after a terrible car accident. I was n a coma for weeks. One day, the nurse decided to play Twitch in the room, specifically to Kripp's channel. I immediately awoke. I went to mute the channel, but it was then that Rania brought Kripp his food, saving me the effort. Kripp saved my life. Rania saved my sanity.
twitch chat
Kripp
Do not call your significant other honey
Do ๐ not ๐ call ๐ your ๐ significant ๐ other ๐ honey ๐ unless ๐ you ๐ are ๐ a ๐ bee ๐ you ๐ are ๐ appropriating ๐ bee ๐ culture, ๐ this ๐ cannot ๐ bee ๐ accepted ๐
Anduin and Uther
twitchquotes:
Anduin is standing outside, looking through the window. He sees how Ben Brode SCAMAZes Tyrande. A small tear runs down his face. "Since Tyrande is the new Priest hero, nobody will ever fulfill my wishes and desires..." A muscular hand lays down on Anduin's shoulder. He turns around and gasps. It's Uther, the Lightbringer himself. "Don't worry, I will make sure you will get my Blessing of Might". Anduin's sorrow immediatly vanishes as he is about to receive his blessing. Uther smirks and reveals his 5/3 Assbringer. "Wow..." Anduin says. Uther slams his Assbringer into Anduin's 1/1 Lightspawn. "Well Played" Uther yells as he Consecrates all over Anduin's face. "BY THE HOLY LIGHT!"
twitch chat