About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
I used to be a real ad
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Fuck you all, I’m never listening to this sub again.
Yesterday I said we’d see a rally like we’ve never seen before
I was ridiculed and the market went down this morning so I accepted defeat and sold my nvda calls and got tesla puts.
My account is down bad right now. I also hedged with a tesla call so hopefully I’ll make something. Somehow oil also tanked.
Fuck you all. I’m only listening to myself now. You’re all retarded and so am I for listening to you.
Edit: not sure why some of you degens think I’m blaming you. Of course it’s my fault. This is a shitpost update. Stop taking it so seriously you retards
See you tomorrow
WallStreetBets
NOPERS
twitchquotes:
Gﮞ͞ ̶͞ ✊ ̶͞ D 
Ɑ͞ ̶͞ ✊ ̶͞ ﻝﮞ͞
Ɑ͞ ̶͞ ✊ ̶͞ ﻝﮞ͞
twitch chat
Jared thought he was back with the crew
twitchquotes:
Jared, jumping for joy at the site of an easy victory with QT thought he was back with the crew. Little did he know QT was devising a cunning plan to demote Jared back to Diamond 3. Boom, like a shot in the dark, an instant 4 man surrender stole the wind right out of Jared. Jared glanced over to his 9mm, knowing one day he will have his chance to right these wrongs.
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imaqtpie
Boosted Animal Jared
League of Legends
We will not go quietly into the night!
twitchquotes:
We will not go quietly into the night! 
We will not vanish without a fight! We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive! Today, we celebrate our Independence Day! BROTHERS, HOLD THE LINE 🏥 _🔪
We will not vanish without a fight! We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive! Today, we celebrate our Independence Day! BROTHERS, HOLD THE LINE 🏥 _🔪
twitch chat
Kripp
I think Zarya smells like dandelions and a cool breeze
twitchquotes:
I think Zarya smells like dandelions and a cool breeze. Her colored hair gives of the scent of strawberries in bloom, and her pink gun leaves a smell of bubblegum when shot. Her body smells of sweat, and a strong womanhood. I would love to stuff my head right into her armpit and smother myself. To smell her tomboyish energy. I would die for this..
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