About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
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its 3 am and i fucked up really bad
I was hungry so i decided to eat some bbq wings and watch some anime. there was about 6 of it and i ate 3 and a half. that was when i started to feel a bit funky on my hand and mouth, and i thought to myself "wow, these bacteria are extra rough today". i used the flashlight on my phone to see what was going on and there was an army of ants covering my hands and i shit you not, i cough once and my mouth is a shotgun that shoots ants as bullets. i was covered in fear and ants and the urge to scream, but the fear of asian parents is stronger. i can only cry silently in a dark and quiet room, all alone, while being violated by ants.
SPAM THIS BANANA TO HELP MICHAEL SANTANA
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SPAM ๐ THIS ๐ BANANA ๐ TO ๐ HELP ๐ MICHAEL ๐ SANTANA
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imaqtpie
KappaPride
= Rainbow face (no space)ARTOSIS, ATTEND ME!
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( เธ อ ยฐ อส อกยฐ)เธ ARTOSIS, ATTEND ME! (เธ อ ยฐ อส อกยฐ)เธ (เธ โโกโ)เธ READY, SIR (เธ โโกโ)เธ
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Kripp
And youโve been, GNOMED
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Ho ho ho ha ha ๐๐คฃ๐, ho ho ho he ha๐คฃ๐คฃ. Hello there๐๐, old chum๐ด๐ต. Iโm ๐
โโ๏ธ g'not ๐
โโ๏ธa g'nelf๐ง๐. Iโm ๐
โโ๏ธg'not๐
โโ๏ธ a g'noblin๐บ๐๐บ. Iโm a g'nome๐
๐!! And youโve been, GNOOOMED๐
๐คฃ๐๐๐คฃ๐คฃ!!!
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