About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
I used to be a real ad
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I love your stream. Just kidding
twitchquotes:
I love your stream. Your energy and optimism is inspiring and you just make my day so much brighter. Just kidding lol. It's tanner. I see you're still playing this children's card game despite me stealing and selling your account back in the day. Anyways, good talk. See you at the gym ... not.
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Hearthstone
Tanner from High School
A casual player like yourself might get injured!
twitchquotes:
Hi Kripp, Mike Morhaime, President of Blizzard Entertainment here. I notice you're playing one of our older games. I have to warn you, the games we made in that era weren't casual-friendly. A casual player like yourself might get injured!
twitch chat
Kripp
Let's say, hypothetically, that you are submissive and breedable
Let's say, hypothetically, that you are on your bed, and let's suppose that you are also submissive and breedable. Now, let's say you are a male. Statistically speaking, humans, that are submissive and breedable tend to be femboys, that's a fact (which doesn't about your feelings). Hypothetically under these circumstances, it would be statistically speaking uncontroversial to assume you would be wearing thigh highs (which would boost your breedability factor by about 20%). Now let's assume you are an SJW SOCIALIST LIBTARD, and let's say I was you, would it not be under these circumstances, the only correct course of action for you to take to ABSOLUTELY WRECK AND DESTROY me (in a debate) in bed?
Ben Shapiro
Partake in the wonderment that is the McGriddle
twitchquotes:
I can only assume from your cavalier attitude that you have yet to partake in the wonderment that is the McGriddle. Let me enlighten you. What happens is the One True God grows them on trees in the Elysian Fields using a heretofore unused incantation. He then proceeds to magic them down to your local eatery where whatever Ghetto Bastard cook your McDonalds has rescued from welfare that week proceeds to wrap it in cellophane and pass it along to you, the fortunate consumer. You proceed to ingest this finery in the vain hope that your obviously overmatched taste buds can somehow grasp the delectable intricacies it is suddenly faced with. Is that egg? Why yes it is, and bacon too. But wait-they didn't add... yes they did, yes they did indeed. They added cheese. And then, then my friends, they wrap it in a sumptuous pancake bun! As your taste buds try to process that amazing piece of information, IT hits them...the syrup nugget. THE MOTHERFUCKING SYRUP NUGGET! It announces itself with a burst of confectionery grandiosity the likes of which your palate has never seen.
twitch chat
Entire screen goes gray ever 30 seconds
twitchquotes:
Hey qtpie, you should check your video settings after this game, there seems to be an issue with the stream. The colors of the video fade and entire screen goes gray every 30 or so seconds
twitch chat
imaqtpie