About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Debunking the existence of females
"FEMALES" DON'T EXIST!!!!!!๐ฑ๐ฑ
A "FEMALE" is a fake person designed by the ๐คฎGOVERNMENT๐คฎ to enslave men!!!!๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ
PROOF๐๐ "FEMALE" stands for;
F ake
E ngineered
MALE !!!!
๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ
So be ๐ฐ๐ฐCAREFUL๐ฐ๐ฐ around someone who claims to be a ๐ก๐ก"FEMALE"๐ก๐ก because they might be a ๐ฑSPY๐ฑ sent by the ๐คฎGOVERNMENT ๐คฎ ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ
If you ๐กDONT๐ก farward this to 20 ๐จโ๐ฆฑpeople๐ง ๐จLITTLE TOMMY๐ฑ will crawl out of your sink and eat Your eyeballs ๐๏ธ๐๏ธ
๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐
Emoji Pasta
Who came? Bananaman
twitchquotes:
My son is running around the house without pants saying "Who Came". I came over to his computer and your sub sound is completely inappropriate. I have the strong urge to disown my son now. Unbelievable. As a parent you disappoint me.
twitch chat
shroud
PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds
Only way I can feel safe
twitchquotes:
When I'm ready to go to sleep I grab my laptop and get in bed. I open my laptop, go to Kripps youtube, turn the brightness all the way up and watch the video with the laptop screen close to my eyes. When the video is done I close my eyes and can still see Kripps face while I go to sleep. It's the only way I can feel safe.
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
I come to Twitch chat to discuss important geopolitical events like the Ukraine crisis
twitchquotes:
You guys are ruining my chat experience. I come to the Twitch chat to discuss important geopolitical events like the ukraine crisis and it's implications on the socioeconomics of Eastern Europe. Yet here you are ruining everything with your frankerzs and kappas.
twitch chat
Kripp
Buying calls on Gamestop
I can't believe that after fifteen years of trading, my best trade of all time is going to be buying calls on fucking Gamestop.