[Copypasta] Response to someone correcting spelling

whats that? holy shit. holy fucking shit. you fucking genius. did you actually just correct someone's spelling? you fucking madlad. i can't believe i just witnessed one of the greatest achievements in human history right now. i think im gonna cry, im so excited. to be honest, i would suck your dick to reward you for your HUGE contribution to the human race if the line wasnt so long. you know what? fuck it. ill let you fuck my wife. ill pay you to fuck her. only for the slim chance that one of her kids will have a small part of your magnificent iq. ill mortgage my fucking house just so you could have 15 minutes with her, while hoping that your MASSIVE cock won't rip her in half. after that, we should start a religion for you. fuck jesus, the only thing this dick did is resurrect himself. you are entitled to the praise he's getting. we should make you immortal. losing you would mean stopping the human evolution and we would all revert to monkeys, not that we are more than monkeys in your majestic presence. I suggest we go to the UN and tell them to hand over all their authority to you, im sure you can unite all the people of the world just with a single swing of your cock, making the entire population wet in the process. just before that one more thing: can you shut the fuck up? nobody cares about that fucking typo you single chromosomed retarded gnome. I bet you think you are so fucking smart and witty after pointing something that didnt bother anyone. God, you are fucking pretentious, i bet you actually believed all of the text above. Did you think i would let you fuck my wife? She is only 12 you sick paedophile. Im calling the police so you could be tortured for eternity while your remains will be forcibly fed to everybody from your family or anyone even remotely related to you while they are forced to anally fuck a penguin. no, seriously do you think i'm joking? i'll come to your house and fuck your ass with a cactus. not that you would feel it after all the things you already had up there. you're a fucking twat that doesnt contribute to society and you deserve to die slowly.
October 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

monkaS

β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ ›β ‹β β €β €β €β €β ™β ›β Ώβ Ÿβ ‹β ‰β β €β ˆβ ™β »β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ ‹β €β Έβ „β’€β£€β  β €β €β£€β‘€β β‘„β €β €β €β €β €β Ύβ ‚β ˆβ »β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ÿβ €β €β €β  β ‹β β €β €β €β €β €β ‰β ™β »β ’β šβ ›β ›β ›β ›β ’β ’β ¦β ˜β’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ β£Ώβ Ÿβ €β €β‘†β €β €β €β €β’€β£€β£΄β£Άβ£Άβ£Άβ£Άβ£Άβ£§β£„β’€β£ β£€β£€β£Άβ£Άβ£Άβ£€β£€β£™β’Ώ ⠁Ⓒ⠀⠸⠅⠀⠀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⑏⑉⠙⣿⣿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⒋⑉Ⓕ⣿⑆ β£€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’‰β ›β Ώβ’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£·β£§β£Άβ‘Ώβ Ÿβ Έβ Ώβ Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ Ώβ Άβ ¬β Ύβ Ώβ’ƒ β “β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ ™β ’β €β €β ¬β ­β β£€β €β –β β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£ β£Ύ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’€β  β ”β Šβ β €β €β €β ‘β ’β‘„β ’β ’β ‚β °β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β’Ώβ£Ώ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£€β£€β£€β£€β£€β£€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’€β‘ˆβ£Ώ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣧⣭⣭⣍⣛⣛⣛③⠢⠢⒦⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣴⣢⠿⠛⣑⣿ β €β €β €β €β °β’„β ˆβ ‰β ‰β ‰β ‰β ‰β ‰β ™β ›β ›β Ώβ Ώβ Ώβ ·β Άβ Άβ£Άβ£Άβ£Άβ‘Άβ’Ÿβ£Έβ£Ώβ£Ώ ⣄⣀⑀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ β €β €β ˆβ ‰β “β ’β ’β €β €β €β €β£€β£€β£€β£€β €β „β €β €β €β’΄β£Άβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ‰β’»β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ
September 2020

Pepe

Keepo

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–“β–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–“β–’β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–“β–“β–€β–“β–“β–’β–“β–’β–’β–€β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–„β–€β–„β–‘β–’β–“β–“β–’β–’β–“β–’β–“β–’β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–„β–€β–‘ β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–’β–’β–“β–’β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β–‘ β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘ β–‘β–€β–„β–“β–‘β–‘β–’β–€β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘ β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–€β–„β–„β–’β–€β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–„β–„β–’β–„β–„β–„β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–’β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–€ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘
November 2014

I accidentally ran over my wife’s pet rabbit with my car

So my wife works from home and she is a graphic designer. She is working from home because the rabbit is very needy and cannot be apart from her without screaming it’s head off. She barely leaves the house due to this and it is difficult because I have to do everything for her and them that requires leaving the house. Whenever we go anywhere together the rabbit has to go with her. However since that post was posted I had developed a plan with the help from some dms and comments I had been acting sick all night and all morning and convinced my wife to go to the market for me to get me medicine. Some Tylenol and cough syrup. She was worried about the rabbit and suggested taking it with her but I somehow convinced her to go without it. We live in a rural area and the closest store is about 20 minutes away. So I hatched my plan as soon as she left. I grabbed that little shit by the neck and while it kicked and screamed I put it into an Amazon box and rushed to the car with it. Initially the plan was to release him into the wild so I drove to the closest wild spot which happens to be a campsite and let the little parasite out. He is partially blind so he just sat there for a bit and I pushed it closer to the grass off the gravel parking lot and it started sniffing around and shit. At this point I thought I was home free and I got into the car to leave but the little shit noticed me getting in and ran towards the car when I started it and moved the car over a bump and I heard a scream. I didn’t know what to do do I started driving and stopped the car a little further away and it was lying there on the gravel parking lot as I started to panic. I didn’t want to kill it I just wanted it gone. Instead I drove over it like a speed bump. I put him back into the box and Drove to the vet. My wife is calling my phone I don’t know what to do, I’m writing this in the waiting room of the vet. I fucked up. The whole thing is a blur. Edit: rabbit is alive, driving home, will update
May 2022

Everything changed when the Hearthstone nation attacked

twitchquotes: Diablo. PoE. WoW. GW2. Long ago,the four games lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Hearthstone nation attacked. Only Kripp, master of no life gaming, could stop them, but when the world needed him the most, he played ResidentSleeper stone.
twitch chat
September 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Streamers should eat before they start streaming

twitchquotes: Streamers should eat before they start streaming. Eating while streaming, unless you put other content on and take the camera off you, is extremely bad manners and disgusting. "Streaming is a real job!" It is. But most streamers dont treat it like a real job. Between failing to make schedules, acting in a way that would be considered unprofessional, constantly calling off, etc etc. Content creation can be a real job. But most dont treat it as one.
twitch chat
April 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing