[Copypasta] Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old"

twitchquotes: Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old," when I would NEVER call him "short and fat?" Oh well, I try so hard to be his friend - and maybe someday that will happen!
twitch chat
November 2017
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More Copypastas

Among Us is love, Among Us is life

I was only nine years old. I loved Among us so much; I had all the merchandise and the skins. I played Among us every night before bed. Thanking Among us for hours of entertainment I've been given. "Among us is love," I say, "Among us is life." My dad hears me and calls me, "A retard." I knew he was just jealous of my devotion for Among us. I call him, "Sus." He slaps me and sends me to bed. I am crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed and it's really cold. I feel a warmth move towards me. I feel something touch me. It's the Crewmates. I am so happy. They whisper in my ear, "Are you the imposter?" They grab me with their hard-working crewmate hands and put me on my hands and knees. I'm ready. I spread my asscheeks for the crewmates. They penetrate my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for the Among us characters. I can feel my rectum tearing as my eyes start to water. I push against their force. I want to please the crewmates. They roar a mighty roar as they fill my butthole with their love. My dad walks in. The crewmates look him straight in the eye and say, "It is all sussed now." The Among us characters leave through my window. Among us is love, Among us is life.
June 2021

Among Us / Amogus

NSFW

According to all known laws of TFT, there is no way a Soju should be able to fast 9

According to all known laws of TFT, there is no way a Soju should be able to fast 9 with this board. Its gold are too small, and its comp is not stable. The Soju, of course, goes fast 9 anyway because Soju doesn't care what humans think is a fast eif.
July 2022
k3soju

Teamfight Tactics

legs man or a breasts man

twitchquotes: One time I was asked if I was a legs man or a breasts man, I said I was into shaved pussy and anal and now I’m "banned from KFC" and "a possible sex offender"
twitch chat
November 2019

I hope your sub's $5 are in Zimbabwean currency

twitchquotes: Wow, Kripp, I was really impressed by how you drew adequate cards and played them in the same ball-numbing, drone-like motions you always do. I hope your sub's $5 are in Zimbabwean currency. ( ° ĶœŹ–Ķ”Ā°)ā•­āˆ©ā•®
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer

Hey, quandale Pringle here, My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer during work and he squeezed my hog so hard and wouldn't even stop after I banned him. My brother Cornelius Bartholomew Anderson ringle got caught in an alberian twitch prime and bits scam and got sent to the gulag, but we've snuck him a Nokia 3310 in his ass with a spoon that he'll be using to plan a breakout with my cousin longsdale dimmsdimone slingle.
July 2022
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