[Copypasta] Promoted to mod status

twitchquotes: ———————————————————————— imGlitch The broadcaster of this channel has promoted you to mod status. Please press the key combo CTRL + W on your keyboard to activate this. ————————————————————————
twitch chat
February 2020
I used to be a real ad
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I'm a new Jerma fan, please send help

I'm a new Jerma fan, please send help What the hell is this guy doing!? I first checked in the middle of his Watchdogs stream few days ago, and he claims to be getting 60fps (despite it looking like 6). I assumed he was just having hardware issues, so I exited the stream for a while and came back. But, as soon as I checked his stream, he was yelling "OOEY-GOOEY CHEESE!" to some sandwich tier lists. What kind of master's degree do you need to understand the complexities of this person?!
January 2022
Jerma985

Shalom my fellow Twitchlings

twitchquotes: Shalom my fellow Twitchlings. My name is Herschel Goldstein, I hail from the ancient land of Israel. In this world there are two superior races: the valiant Japanese and the God-fearing Jews. When I met the great Kripp at Blizzcon 2013, he gave me a piece of advice that I will never forget: "Pentru a da oul omului, îl hrănești pentru o zi. Om învățat de ouă, îl va hrăni pentru o viață întreagă." Translated into foreign devil talk: I am coming Yankee scum. Get on board or get out of the way."
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

I want to be Kripp's knee

twitchquotes: Ｗｈｅｎ Ｉ ｓｅｅ Ｋｒｉｐｐ＇ｓ ｋｎｅｅ， Ｉ ｗａｎｔ ｔｏ ｌｉｃｋ ｔｈｅ ｋｎｅｅ． Ｉ ｗａｎｔ ｔｏ ｌｉｖｅ ｉｎ ｔｈｅ ｋｎｅｅ． Ｉ ｗａｎｔ ｔｏ ｂｅ ｔｈｅ ｋｎｅｅ． Ｉ ｗａｎｔ ｔｏ ｂｅ ｔｈｅ ｋｎｅｅ ｆｒｅｅ． Ｐｌｅａｓｅ ｎｏ ｃｏｐｙ ｐａｓｔｅｒｉｎｏ ｄｏｎｇｅｒｉｎｏ ｐｏｏｐｅｒｉｎｏ．
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

This channel needs to hire some proper mods

twitchquotes: This channel needs to hire some proper mods. Chat is just filled with idiotic people spamming mindless copy pastas who cant engage in intelligent conversation about the game being displayed. Its a step back in evolution in my opinionss
twitch chat
January 2019

I hate Twitch Chat

How to kill a geologist

Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy. I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.
January 2022
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