[Copypasta] Blue Lives Matter (Smurfs)

blue people don't exist. this is offensive. i have never in my life met a blue person. SMURFS ARENT REAL GUYS. IM TIRED OF SEEING THIS BLUE LIVES MATTER, SMURFS ARE NOT REAL THERE ARE NO BLUE PEOPLE. and even if they were real, they do not matter. i hate smurfs. theyre ugly and short. i could step on them. they have big noses. i just want to pick them up and bite their heads like laffy taffy. DO NOT STAN BLUE LIVES
October 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Flanders Diddly Spamly Doodly

โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„ โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„ โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–’DIDDLYโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’SPAMLYโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’DOODLYโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œ โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œ โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–€โ–’โ–ˆโ–Œ โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–Œ โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–Œโ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–
September 2016

Classic

A severe lack of cute emotes in chat

twitchquotes: Konichiwa Kripp-kun AYAYA . This is your kawaii kouhai Aya-chan, calling in from Nihon. I have noticed a severe lack of cute emotes in chat tonight, and instead all I see are baka dansgame and baka nammers. This is not very sugoi, and I would appreciate it if your chat showed more respect for Japanese culture by typing kawaii emotes like AYAYA and AstolfoSmile . Arigato gozaimasu <3
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Weebs

Classic

Nyan Cat

________โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„______ _______โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ_____ _______โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„_ __โ–„โ–„___โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆ_ โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–„_ _โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–“โ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆ_ _____โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ ______โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–“โ–„โ–€_ ____โ–„โ–€โ–“โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€___ ____โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€_โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€_______โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€_โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–ˆ_____
November 2014

Bear King Burry vs TSLA

Bear King Michael Burry in the ring, slappin TSLA with a metal chair. His glass eye open wide with rage as he batters TSLA relentlessly. "The valuation..." crunch "makes...." crunch "NO.... " crunch "SENSE!" he roars with maniacal autistic glee. TSLA struggles for the edge of the ring, but coughs blood as each hit lands, and eventually stops moving. Bear King Burry drops the chair. Bear King Burry turns to the crowd "Was this your champion!? Was TSLA supposed to be your chosen one!?" A child in the crowd turns his face into his mother's side and cries. On the side of the ring WSB can barely move. TSLA was supposed to tag them in, but couldn't make it to the side in time. "Get up TSLA" WSB whimpers hopelessly, a single tear rolling down their cheek. "Get up..." Bear King Burry turns to WSB "Now it is your portfolio's turn. Get in here you little bitch." "Excuse me." Someone replies from behind BKB. "I believe I can give you the fight you want." A robed figure is administering smelling salts to TSLA. The figure puts TSLA on its shoulder and carries TSLA gently out of the ring. "And just who the fuck do you think you are?" BKB rumbles ominously. BKB's fingers squeeze so tightly on the chair that metal bends. "Who am I?" the robed figure inquires. The robed figure stands straight and stretches to their full height. They must be at least 7' tall. The crowd stops crying and watches in stunned silence. "Who am I?" The figure repeats menacingly. The figure turns around to face BKB, ripping off his robe. A gleaming light fills the stadium. Before us stands a Golden deity, rippling with muscle. If there is an ounce of body fat it is currently in hiding, only to make way for seemingly endless coiled golden musculature. The figure looks directly into Bear King Burry's eyes. "I'm Goldman Sachs, and i'm here to kill you."
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Kripp play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go!

twitchquotes: Privyet, Komrade Kripp! Is your cousin Dmitri from Mother Russia! I am of hearing that you make much moneys by playing simplistic card game for toddlers and whining like little baby in front of thousands of simpletons! BLYAT! You should play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go! Already I am recruit by man with enormous forehead for professional team Tampon Storm and will be winning many tournaments, yes! Don't be a cyka, you capitalist pig, and stop crying like baby! Love, Dmitri.
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing