[Copypasta] Blue Lives Matter (Smurfs)

blue people don't exist. this is offensive. i have never in my life met a blue person. SMURFS ARENT REAL GUYS. IM TIRED OF SEEING THIS BLUE LIVES MATTER, SMURFS ARE NOT REAL THERE ARE NO BLUE PEOPLE. and even if they were real, they do not matter. i hate smurfs. theyre ugly and short. i could step on them. they have big noses. i just want to pick them up and bite their heads like laffy taffy. DO NOT STAN BLUE LIVES
October 2021
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More Copypastas

valorant is not csgo

twitchquotes: Valorant is not csgo Everywhere I go I see things like valorant vs csgo, which is harder, which is better, which is more competitive/fun, and its confusing, yes valorant is a tac shooter, and has similar mechanics, but this is just another example of what people did with overwatch vs tf2 especially on release, it was all pointless because overwatch ISNT tf2 and valorant ISNT csgo regardless of their similar mechanics, valorant requires immensly more teamwork, and has whacky tools csgo has never seen, like stim beacon, sage’s entire kit, cyphers entire kit, sovas entire kit, breach fault line and aftershock, and EVERYONES ultimate, its never been seen before in a tac shooter, valorant isnt better/worse, harder/easier, its different, and always will be
twitch chat
June 2021

Valorant

CSGO

Super Meat Boy v2

⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣦⣶⢶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠛⢿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡟⠡⠂⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠘⠁⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⢠⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣗⢴⣶⣷⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣴⣿⣗⣄⣼⣷⣶⡄⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⡅⠐⣶⣦⣶⠀⢰⣶⣴⣦⣦⣶⠴⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣼⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣷⣬⡛⠷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣭⣭⣥⣭⣵⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠙⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⢛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
October 2020

Infinite Cum Part 3

Your release had increased so much that they could no longer contain you. Your cum has consumed the entirety of the cosmos. Humanity is without a shred of doubt, gone. You are alone in the universe. If there were aliens, they are dead now. It’s over. In despair, you mourn the death of the scientists, of humanity, of everyone. You realize you'll never hear her sweet and calming voice, see her proud body. Your sad. Your terrified. Chronicles pass. The last stars in the universe eclipse. You silently watch as the last atoms break into protons, into quarks, into mere beams of weak energy that disperse along the vertical ropes. But the ropes no longer play their docile music. They have gonne silent. You watch, helplessly, as the Last mozon is engulfed into the ever expanding plane of Cum. Your own creation destroys the very own universe, defying the own plan of existence. You are alone. You scream, but nothing comes out of your mouth. You cry, but nothing descends from your eyes. Do you even have eyes? All you can see is the torrid Instotucional white across the whole of the Universe. Entire Gans eclipse before your eyes, but then you realize the horror: The Cum turned against you. With nothing more to consume, your sons turned against their father, and begin to consume you. You tremble. There's nothing to do. The huge weight impacts you like if whole planets fell onto your shoulders. Your alone. In your last moments, a odd sentiment of peace invades you for the first time since the early days of the universe. It's finally gonna end. You think about all the people that you've met during your stay in this universe. In the end, you think about the researcher. About her arms. Her breasts. You feel... good. For the first time in many hipereons. You jack off it. It's so.... good, you come at the right time, freeing the constrained cum from your menber. You open your eyes, and behold the bathroom door. You are Ok. You remember everything. It's all over. You exit the bathroom after jacking off again, going back to your old life. The cum stops.
April 2022

Infinite Cum

time for u to stop using this copypasta

what time is it? 12 11 ^ 1 10 | 2 time for u 9 ⊙————> to stop 8 4 using this 7 5 copypasta 6
January 2021

Classic

I am going to short the whole country of South Africa

I assure you, this ISN'T going to get political. Because by all accounts South Africa is screwed. My planned position is bottom paragraph. Under the current ANC government there has been a general degeneration of all aspects of South Africa. Due to systemic nepotism, there are math teachers that don't know what square roots are, army officers that can't read, and cops that have never fired a gun. The practice of fictitious employees that take checks but don't work there is widespread enough that the government has drove itself into insolvency already. Estimates are that some 80% of government funds are misused in some way, ranging from government subsidies given to businesses owned by government officials to simply going missing from accounts. The ANC solved this, against advise of wiser people, with quantitative easing. Which is a fancy term for printing money, and since they could never possibly reverse that printer they're inflating the South African Rand which is why they've had two bouts of inflation near 9% twice in the past 20 years. That is all besides how the largely defunct government doesn't prevent anything on the ground. Roaming bands of pirates (many affiliates of the Marxist Economic Freedom Fighter party) will poison guard dogs and torture and murder residents often for as little as car keys and groceries. Many communities are functionally independent and take the law in their own hands, and in many areas utilities are defunct (untreated sewage goes in the river, untreated tap water comes out and it smells as disgusting as it sounds). South Africans are more likely to have their asylum applications accepted than any other nation as there are so many tales of rape and murder and threats of ethnic cleansing. This equates to the most educated citizens leaving SA and most SA based businesses diversifying out of the country as literacy rates have been falling. These disillusioned departures are not new, as they include the most famous Afrikaner in history Elon Musk who is now a naturalized American. Edit: The Economic Freedom Fighter's usual acronym isn't used because it's also the ticker for a penny stock. I first thought about shorting South Africa over a year ago when I was researching the country (I'm a historian, I read much on the country for fun). I found the only index tracking SA (EZA) wasn't an accurate representation of SA economy and buying puts on it was useless. It tracked only the largest cap firms, which are the aforementioned companies diversifying out of SA (mostly to other parts of Africa). Which is why it's a volatile ETF that overall trades sideways. Buying puts on it wouldn't really capitalize on SA going full Rhodesia/Zimbabwe. Zimbabwe having experienced the general breakup of modern institutions and hyperinflation due to similar problems. My new broker, IBKR, allows negative currency positions as long you post 10% as collateral. Now my native currency are US dollars, where inflation in 2020 was 1.4% while the South African Rand's inflation was 4.12% in 2020. That equals a 26.8% return on investment per year from that simple short position. But I'm expecting US Dollar inflation to stay between 1-2% a year while the Rand (ticker ZAR) stays north of 4% with inflation spikes inevitable over the next decade. This position also reduces my market beta, much needed for me as I've got hugely leveraged positions on American ETFs. This isn't a short term swing trade, I'm waiting for SA to implode.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

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