[Copypasta] Dear people who comment on porn

Dear people who comment on porn, why? Do you really think whoever the fuck you’re masturbating to will see “you are gorgeous I would love to tittyfuck you, it would be my pleasure😍😍😍” will fly over to your house have sex with your fatass and then fly back? No. If it ever actually does happen, I’d bet that pornstar does it a lot. Which means constant flying. Porn commenters are causing global warming.
September 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Art of Conquest is the best!

twitchquotes: (sponsored viewer): Hey Kripp! I just saw your Youtube video about Art of Conquest! It looks like such an amazing free game with a lot of wonderful content and replayablility. I was wondering you were going to play Art of Conquest on stream for us tonight? It would be a privilege to watch such a skilled gamer with a positive attitude such as yourself play this mind-bogglingly complex game. Thanks Kripp, you're the best - just like Art of Conquest!
twitch chat
September 2017
Kripp

sellout

OkaygeBusiness (fits twitch chat)

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⡕⠉⢠⣄⠈⠙⠁⢰⠄⠀⠈ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⡅⠀⣿⠅⠀⠀⢀⠘⠛⣀⣠ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⣠⠴⠶⣤⡀⢶⣦⣿⣦⣤⣀⣤⠴⠻⣿⣿⠿⠛ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⣿⠐⢶⣈⠛⠦⣬⣍⣉⣉⣉⣀⣀⣀⣨⡥⠖⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠙⢷⣄⠉⠓⠶⠤⢤⣬⣭⡭⠭⠭⠷⠖⣒⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⢀⡀⠠⡀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠓⠶⠶⠦⠤⠶⣶⣲⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⣀⣼⣿⡁⠀⢹⣷⣷⣶⣶⣶⡀⠀⡠⠋⡉⠁⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡟⢩⡍⠀⠀⠀⠀⣛⠓⣆⠀⠉⢉⣿⡿⠉⢶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⢧⣾⡛⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠛⢃⡘⠳⣄⣀⣀⠔⠻⣀⠛⠒⣶⣯⠛⢷⣤⡈⣷⠂⢀⡟⢁⠼⠟⠋⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⠐⠚⠓⠒⠒⠛⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⣾⣿⣿⠀⠀⠙⢿⣾⣷⣮⣴⠗⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⡏⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⢻⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿
October 2021

Pepe

I'm not gay but I want to live with Kanye West

I want to live in a log cabin in the woods with Kanye. We won't ever have sex, but there will be a simmering erotic undercurrent as I stand in the kitchen window watching him tighten his ass as he chops wood, shirtless, sweat pouring off his body. I'll run upstairs and masturbate, the entire time forcing myself to think of women while my thoughts drift back to Kanye. I won't be able to climax and I'll eventually go back downstairs, angry. Sometimes we will look across the table and catch each other's eyes, and in that second, anything is possible, but we both deny ourselves and go back to what we were doing. One day one of us will die, and the other will bury him outside the log cabin. Then they'll go inside, pen a brief missive to their departed friend, and commit suicide, never able to deal with life without their one true platonic love.
August 2021

Kanye West

NOW WE JEBAITED

twitchquotes: Jebaited KAPPA OUTDATED Jebaited POGCHAMP OVERRATED Jebaited LONG HAVE WE WAITED Jebaited NOW WE JEBAITED Jebaited
twitch chat
September 2016

Classic

Sir you have been found with Rocket League hacks

twitchquotes: Sir you have been found with Rocket League hacks. A SWAT team is on the way to your location. Make sure the door is open, otherwise they are ready to break it down. Don't destroy any evidence and don't contact your accomplices! Prepare disks, flash drives and any other multimedia devices containing illegal materials, proving your criminality. Be prepared to answer the questions during your interrogation! Cooperate and don't deny the charges against you.
twitch chat
June 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing