[Copypasta] To the conservative suburban woman behind me in line at Subway yesterday:

To the conservative suburban woman behind me in line at Subway yesterday: I’m sorry I kept referring to Fred’s liberally mayo’d oven-roasted chicken sub as a “bukkake special”. I’m sorry that you kept demanding that your teenage son explain why he was laughing so hard. I’m extra sorry that this turn of events led you to practically yelling “ETHAN, WHAT IS A BUKKAKE SPECIAL?” in the middle of a crowded restaurant.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Here you go again you simp

twitchquotes: Here you go again you simp. pokiYikes If youre so butthurt about poki being the cooler, swagger and more beautiful streamer then why dont you just stop and think about what she means to me. I give her my paycheck. I almost had to take a mortgage out just to buy food but you know what? It doesnt matter. Pokimane reads when I sub each month and she gives me a smile so its worth. Sorry for rambling I just cant deal with you pathetic simps ✋
twitch chat
November 2019
Pokimane

Simps

Great Thermo-War

twitchquotes: It is the year 2134. I am one of the last people on the planet. Nearly everyone was wiped out in the Great Thermo-War. Now there is no reason to live. I open my holodeck-transponder and go to "Twitch tv". I turn on Kripp's stream and see that he has made it to Rank 10. I succumb to my radiation poisoning.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Sometimes I sit alone in my bathroom with the light off and pretend to be you

twitchquotes: Kripp if you're here right now reading this I want you to know I dream of you. Sometimes I sit alone in my bathroom with the light off and pretend to be you. I'll say things like "hey guys how's it goin' Kripparrian here", and for a brief moment I feel you inside me...
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Classic

the best way to waste time

twitchquotes: imaqtpie's stream is undoubtedly the best way to waste time. Nothing of value happens here and you can study a real homeless man in preparation for when your life inevitably falls apart as a result
twitch chat
April 2018
imaqtpie

PepegaEZ

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⠶⠤⠄⠄⣶⣶⣤⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣰⣿⣿⣿⣶⣬⠝⠻⢯⣥⣶⣶⠄⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣫⠶⣚⣓⣒⠌⢛⡵⢋⣵⠶⢦⡀⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⢒⣉⣑⠢⣾⣿⣿⣿⡟⢩⣾⣿⡿⠛⢿⣮⠱⣿⣿⠠⡄⠹⡄⠠⠤ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣯⣶⣿⣿⣦⣙⠿⠿⠿⠆⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⢠⡄⠄⠉⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣏⣭⣭⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠼⣅⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠ ⠺⣿⣿⣿⢟⣵⡿⢿⣷⣮⡻⢿⣷⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣵⣿⣿⣿⣮⣻⡿⠶⣚⠔⠄ ⠄⠈⠻⣿⢸⣿⡕⣷⣬⡻⢿⣷⣬⣛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣛⣫⣥⠶⠛⠁⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠈⠁⠻⢿⣮⡉⠉⠓⠶⣮⣭⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠄⣰⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠓⠒⠠⣄⣉⣙⣛⣛⣋⣁⣠⠤⠴⠖⢟⡁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣨⣭⣭⠵⠶⠒⠉⠄⠄⠄⠈⠑⠢⡄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣷⣶⠶⣫⣼⣦⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡴⠋⠄⠄⠄
November 2021

Pepe

Text-to-Speech Playing