To the conservative suburban woman behind me in line at Subway yesterday:
I’m sorry I kept referring to Fred’s liberally mayo’d oven-roasted chicken sub as a “bukkake special”. I’m sorry that you kept demanding that your teenage son explain why he was laughing so hard. I’m extra sorry that this turn of events led you to practically yelling “ETHAN, WHAT IS A BUKKAKE SPECIAL?” in the middle of a crowded restaurant.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Yee
░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄███▄▄▄░░░░░░░
░░░░░░░░░▄▄▄██▀▀▀▀███▄░░░░░
░░░░░░░▄▀▀░░░░░░░░░░░▀█░░░░
░░░░▄▄▀░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▀█░░░
░░░█░░░░░▀▄░░▄▀░░░░░░░░█░░░
░░░▐██▄░░▀▄▀▀▄▀░░▄██▀░▐▌░░░
░░░█▀█░▀░░░▀▀░░░▀░█▀░░▐▌░░░
░░░█░░▀▐░░░░░░░░▌▀░░░░░█░░░
░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░░░
░░░░█░░▀▄░░░░▄▀░░░░░░░░█░░░
░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░▄▄░░░░█░░░░
░░░░░█▀██▀▀▀▀██▀░░░░░░█░░░░
░░░░░█░░▀████▀░░░░░░░█░░░░░
░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░▄█░░░░░░
░░░░░░░██░░░░░█▄▄▀▀░█░░░░░░
░░░░░░░░▀▀█▀▀▀▀░░░░░░█░░░░░
░░░░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░█░░░░
Why did you pick Hero at EVO?
twitchquotes:
Nairo, it's been weeks since EVO and I still don't understand why you didn't choose Hero and win the whole thing. It'll be a matter of time before we follow Australia's example and ban him, and you'll be sorry you didn't use his banworthy strength when you could. Also can you use Ganondorf again, he's rlly strong. Sorry for long message, but you should consider my advice. Good luck Nairo!
twitch chat
NairoMK
Super Smash Bros
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth JPOW The Wise?
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth JPOW The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Motley Fool would tell you. It’s a 🏳️🌈🐻 legend. Darth JPOW was a Dark Lord of the FED, so gay and such a bear he could use his money printer to influence the economy to create inflation… He had such a knowledge of the economy that he could even keep stonk prices from falling. The dark side of the economy is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be… transitory. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his tendies, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught Nancy Pelosi everything he knew, then she sold at the top. Ironic. He could save others from market corrections, but not himself.
WallStreetBets
Things are looking up for me (and down for you)
twitchquotes:
I don’t need you. There are a whole lot of other streamers that deserve my time and support. As they say there are plenty of other fish in the sea. Fish without husbands too... you liar skank. I will no longer be dedicating 1/3 of my day to moderating your chat. Let the wildebeests roam... and if you need me, I’ll be in STPeach’s chat from now on. You may not know this but I actually do watch her streams after yours are over. And I’ve been a 6 month subscriber as well... I donated her $30 the other day and said her outfit looked cute - she said I’m a sweetheart. Things are looking up for me (and down for you). This is where I bid farewell to you, have fun being a liar bitchface.
twitch chat
Simps
My best friend is racist
So I met him today and asked him: "Hello, my best friend, are you racist?"
And he replied with: "Yes, I'm racist"
I was shocked. So I asked him back: "You racist?"
He said: "Yes, I'm actually racist"
To comprehend him, I asked: "Why are you racist?"
He answered with: "Because I'm racist"
I made sure: "Racism?"
He replied: "Yeah, racism"
I shout out: "Oh no"
He just: "Yeah"
And I'm just: "That's so racist"
He: "Racism"