[Copypasta] I sexually identify as an Attack Helicopter

I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm *** retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
November 2014

Classic

I sexually Identify as

I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas

Auto-Pay feature

twitchquotes: Hello Octavian Kripparrian, Marvel Future Fight devs here. We have noticed you have used our "Auto-Play" functionality extensively today, with much better results than when you played the game yourself. Because of this success, we are happy to announce another brand-new feature: "Auto-Pay". We have seen you spend a large amount of time inefficiently upgrading your character, and this time is better spent Auto-Playing. Please click the "Auto-Pay" button, and let your Credit Card do the work!
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

sellout

Classic

Saitama says OK

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⡾⠏⠉⠙⠳⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠞⠉⠙⠲⡀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣴⠿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢳⡀⠀⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢷ ⠀⠀⢠⣟⣋⡀⢀⣀⣀⡀⠀⣀⡀⣧⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡇ ⠀⠀⢸⣯⡭⠁⠸⣛⣟⠆⡴⣻⡲⣿⠀⣸⠀⠀OK⠀ ⡇ ⠀⠀⣟⣿⡭⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢱⠀⠀⣿⠀⢹⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡇ ⠀⠀⠙⢿⣯⠄⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⡿⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⡼ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣶⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠃⠀⠀⠘⠤⣄⣠⠞⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣷⡦⢤⡤⢤⣞⣁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣤⣴⣿⣏⠁⠀⠀⠸⣏⢯⣷⣖⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⣾⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⢲⣶⣾⢉⡷⣿⣿⠵⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⣿⠍⠉⣿⡭⠉⠙⢺⣇⣼⡏⠀⠀⠀⣄⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣧⣀⣿.........⣀⣰⣏⣘⣆⣀⠀⠀
June 2019

Classic

Do not fear a man that spams 1000 memes

twitchquotes: MingLee Do not fear a man that spams 1000 memes, instead fear a man that spams a meme 1000 times MingLee
twitch chat
June 2016

Classic

I hope Zoe wins xD

twitchquotes: I hope Zoe wins xD. I’m a Zoe main and she’s just so fun!! People get so trolled by the bubble, and her voice lines are so cute like when she sings about chocolate cake LOL! She’s super random but also smarter than she looks, just like me xD
twitch chat
February 2020

Classic

League of Legends

Malta vs Penguins

This does not change the fact that in Antarctica there are 21 million penguins and in Malta there are 502,653 inhabitants. So if the penguins decide to invade Malta, each Maltese will have to fight 42 penguins.
May 2021

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing