I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm *** retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
I used to be a real ad
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Shrek is love. Shrek is life
I was only nine years old. I loved Shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies. I'd pray to Shrek every night before I go to bed, thanking for the life I've been given. "Shrek is love", I would say, "Shrek is life". My dad hears me and calls me a faggot. I knew he was just jealous for my devotion of Shrek. I called him a cunt. He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep. I'm crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed and it's really cold. A warmth is moving towards me. I feel something touch me. It's Shrek. I'm so happy. He whispers in my ear, "This is my swamp". He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I spread my ass-cheeks for Shrek. He penetrates my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for Shrek. I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water. I push against his force. I want to please Shrek. He roars a mighty roar, as he fills my butt with his love. My dad walks in. Shrek looks him straight in the eye, and says, "It's all ogre now". Shrek leaves through my window. Shrek is love. Shrek is life.๏ปฟ
Shrek
Classic
ALERT INCOMING DANK MEME
twitchquotes:
๐๐๐จ๐จWARNING๐๐จ๐จWARNING๐จ๐จ๐THIS IS A ๐ธDANK ๐ฝMEMEโโ ๐ธALERT. INCOMING ๐ธDANK ๐ฝMEME๐ธ ๐๐HEADING STRAIGHT ๐๐YOUR WAY. ๐๐๐๐PLEASE TAKE ANY PRECAUTIONS๐ง๐ง NECESSARY TO PREPARE YOURSELF FOR THIS ๐ธDANK ๐ฝMEMEโโ ๐ธ ๐๐๐ .BUCKLE UPโฟโฟโฟ THEM SEATBELTS๐ฎ๐ฎ,PUT THEM CELLPHONES ON SILENT๐ต๐ต AND LOOSEN THAT ANUS๐
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๐๐๐๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ CUZ THIS MEME JUST CAME STRAIGHT OUT OF THE ๐ฌ๐ฌ ๐๐ญ๐๐ญ๐๐ฌ๐ฌDANK FACTORY.
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Emoji Pasta
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Grammarly ad script
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Classic
Start with something small like your intelligence
twitchquotes:
I've heard shoving things up your ass is quite painful so you might want to start with something small like your intelligence and build up to bigger things like your ego
twitch chat
Classic
Trevor from ChatBotsForTwitch.com
twitchquotes:
Hi [insert streamer name], this is Trevor from ChAtBotsForTwitch,com. We kindly request that if you're going to pay the extra to have our employees interact with your chat, you don't make fun of them. We know you have difficulty getting real viewers and it frustrates you, but please don't take it out on my employees. Thank you, Trevor.
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