I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm *** retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
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More Classic Copypastas
Hi Kripp, sleazy video game developer here
twitchquotes:
Hi Kripp, sleazy video game developer here. I understand you are willing to sell yourself out like a cheap Romanian hooker to any two-bit game development outfit as long as they dangle some shekels in front of your beady little eyes? Great! Because I have this brilliant game in beta testing right now called "Watching Paint Dry" and I am willing to pay you $5.00 USD to play it for 24 hours straight. Let me know what you think, you glorious sellout!
twitch chat
Kripp
sellout
Classic
Mario poops mods
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ββββββMODSββββββββββββββββββ
MODS
Classic
If any of you copy and paste this you will be in serious trouble
twitchquotes:
αΆ¦ Λ’Κ·α΅α΅Κ³ α΅α΅ α΅α΅α΅ αΆ¦αΆ α΅αΆ°ΚΈ α΅αΆ ΚΈα΅α΅ α΅α΅α΅Κ°α΅Κ³Κ³αΆ α΅αΆα΅α΅Κ³Λ’ αΆα΅α΅ΚΈ α΅αΆ°α΅ α΅α΅Λ’α΅α΅ α΅Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ ΚΈα΅α΅ Κ·αΆ¦αΆ«αΆ« α΅α΅ αΆ¦αΆ° Λ’α΅Κ³αΆ¦α΅α΅Λ’ α΅Κ³α΅α΅α΅αΆ«α΅
twitch chat
Classic
You guessed it right, I'm from NA
twitchquotes:
MY BELLY IS HUGE MY BRAIN HAS DELAY YOU GUESSED IT RIGHT I'M FROM NA.
MY BELLY IS HUGE MY BRAIN HAS DELAY YOU GUESSED IT RIGHT I'M FROM NA.
twitch chat
Classic
EU vs NA
Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)
I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.