[Copypasta] ⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my penis was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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Dr DisRespect

⣿⠄⡇⢸⣟⠄⠁⢸⡽⠖⠛⠈⡉⣉⠉⠋⣁⢘⠉⢉⠛⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣷⣶⣷⣤⠄⣠⠖⠁⠄⠂⠁⠄⠄⠉⠄⠄⠎⠄⠠⠎⢐⠄⢑⣛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠓⠨⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠐⠅⠄⠉⠄⠗⠆⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡣⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣤⣦⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⡙⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠔⠿⡿⠿⠒⠄⠠⢤⡀⡀⠄⠁⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⡖⠄⠁⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣽⠟⡖⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣠⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⣧⠄⠂⠸⣈⡏⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡞⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⡿⢻⡿⣻⣶⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡷⡂⠄⠄⠁⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠉⠉⠙⠛⢿⣿⡇⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣶⣶⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⡿⠁⣀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣄⢈⣿⡇⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣯⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣥⣬⣿⣿⣟⣿⠃⠄⠨⠺⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⠱⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣬⣸⡝⠿⢿⣿⡿⣿⠻⠟⠻⢫⡁⠄⠄⠄⡐⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⡜⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠆⡐⡇⢿⣽⣻⣷⣦⣧⡀⡀⠄⠄⣴⣺⡇⠄⠁⠄⢣⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠡⠱⠄⠄⠡⠄⢠⣷⠆⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣾⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠠⠁⠿⣿⣿⣿ ⢀⣲⣧⣷⣿⢂⣄⡉⠄⠘⠿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣻⣯⠿⠟⠋⠉⢰⢦⠄⠊⢾⣷⣮⣽⣛
November 2018
DrDisRespectLIVE

Salt mines are now Greece's #1 export

twitchquotes: Hello Mr. Kripp, on behalf of the entire Greek country, I would like to thank you for single handedly restoring our economy with your endless supplies of salt. Salt mines are now Greece's #1 export. Most excellent, all hail Kripperino!
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Keep spamming, while I succeed in life

twitchquotes: Since my IQ is quite above the average, I will not be joining this spamming festival. I know you would not understand it, just like you dont understand why I have a good job, and big library. Keep spamming, while I succeed in life
twitch chat
October 2020

Imposter broke into my house!

So yesterday I was eating with my family when all of a sudden a “crew mate” broke in through the front door. He had a ski mask on and a gun which was sus, but he a good skin. My father told us all to hide so we don’t get killed by the obvious imposter. I could see him from my hiding spot under the table and he looked sus. So I told my dad “DAD YOU THINK HE IS THE IMPOSTER? HE IS SUS!” I yelled as loud as I could. The imposter found us hiding and shot my father five times. The imposter was so dumb, who kills someone in front of crew mates? I ran to call the emergency meeting by grabbing my phone off the table when I heard my mother get shot and scream for me. Lol she was so bad at among us. My teammates sucked and were dying to the worst Imposter. So I called the emergency meeting and for some reason a S.W.A.T team rammed down the door and killed the imposter. Lol that’s not how the game goes, I think they were hacking.
April 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Spider

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⡙⢿⣿⣦⡙⠻⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡉⠛⠓⠢⡈⢿⡿⠁⣸⣿⡿⠿⢋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣍⣙⡋⠠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠘⠁⠄⠴⠚⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡴⠖⠒⠄⠁⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⣩⣴⣶⣿⣿⣶⡞⠉⣠⣇⠄⣿⣶⣦⣄⡀⠲⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢠⣿⣿⣿⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣌⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢡⣿⣿⣿⡏⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
January 2019
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