I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Trying to study the psyche of Twitch Chat
twitchquotes:
I Stayed up for months, trying to study the psyche of twitch chat, i reached insanity and couldnt come up with anything, but along the road i stumbled upon a far greater discovery, i found out that indeed, Kripp, IS 
Never Lucky
Never Lucky
twitch chat
Kripp
neverlucky
Dont believe me? watch me post this on my other accounts
twitchquotes:
I like how [insert streamer name] doesn't realize that all his viewers are me on different accounts. Dont believe me? watch me post this on my other accounts
twitch chat
Classic
Ameng be thy name
twitchquotes:
Our father who rolls in heaven, Ameng be thy name. thy goats may come, thy will be shattered, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily cheese, and forgive us our throwing, as we forgive those who throw against us, and lead us not into Mayhem, but deliver us from Justice.
twitch chat
OverwatchLeague
Overwatch
The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza
The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza. Foolish mistake. Anyone should know that there is no "when". As parmesan fills the restaurant, the pizza only gets better. After only an hour, the restaurants interior its completely filled with parmesan, killing twenty. But the resuraunt is only the beginning. Next the USA will be taken by parmesan, a force stronger than anyone could have anticipated. After that comes the world. Consider this a warning, to get to a foreign planet immediately. At least that will provide temporary safety, until the parmesan rises to mars. At that point, there will be enough cheese on my pizza, and I will be ready to eat.
lul EU.... I guess
twitchquotes:
Lost to EU in Twitch Rivals 
Lost to EU at Worlds Lost to EU at MSI Only 1 NA mid next season lul EU.... I guess
Lost to EU at Worlds Lost to EU at MSI Only 1 NA mid next season lul EU.... I guess
twitch chat
Riot Games