[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

R-Reynad-sama? Could you please roleplay?

twitchquotes: (»° _ °«) R-Reynad-sama? Could you please, um, roleplay, so when your hero takes damage... you um, p-pretend y-you take damage...! T-thank you... (>/////<)
twitch chat
January 2015
Reynad

Weebs

Classic

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as a Lamborghini

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as a LAMBORGHINI. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of DRIVing UP HERE IN THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS. People say to me that a person being a LAMBORGHINI is Impossible and I’m MATERIALISTIC but I don’t care, I’m this NEW LAMBORGHINI HERE. I’m having a plastic surgeon install , 7 NEW bookshelves and 2000 new books on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “NEW LAMBORGHINI HERE” and respect my right to DRIVE UP HERE IN THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS. If you can’t accept me you’re a LAMBOphobe and need to check your GNAWLIDGE. Thank you, and I'll see you on my website.
twitch chat
October 2016

I sexually Identify as

Forsen's face

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠛⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢘⣿ ⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⢀⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿ ⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠄⠄⢺⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⢸⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⢸⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠻⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠄⠉⠉⣻⣾⣿ ⡆⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⡟⢀⠔⠒⡀⠄⣸⣿⣷⡄⡈⢉⠁⣠⣿⣹⣿ ⣿⣀⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⡒⢚⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣟⢉⡵⣆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣼⣦⣿⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠩⠁⡄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠝⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢁⣀⡀⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣼⣿⣿⢻⣿ ⡿⠿⠛⠛⣷⠈⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⣿⣏⡀⢀⣹⣿⠙⠟⠄⣼⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣧⡀⠄⠈⠉⠛⠻⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⡟⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣷⣆⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣴⡇⠄⠄⠄⠈
April 2022
Forsen

Can I get my dick sucked by a tornado?

If you get pulled by a tornado, would the intense winds and stuff on your cock make you cum? And what would happen if that cum get thrown on something like a public park or near a school? Would you get registered if they found out it's your cum?
February 2021

Kripp needs to find a Romanian woman

twitchquotes: KRIPP! This is Papparian, your father! What is this I hear about marrying a Greek woman and making mini kripps with her??!! You need to find yourself a real full bodied Romanian woman, boy. One that can hand squeeze OJ and carry on our bloodline.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp
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