[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

So you're going by "Activision-Blizzard" now nerd?

twitchquotes: So you're going by "Activision-Blizzard" now nerd? Haha whats up douche bag, it's Riot from Highschool. Remember me? Me and Gaben used to give you a hard time in school. Sorry you were just an easy target lol. I can see not much has changed. Remember Hearthstone the game you had a crush on? Yeah, I have the better card game now. I make over 200 billion a year selling skins and I drive a Boeing 787. I guess some things never change huh loser? Good luck at 'Blizzcon' lol. Pathetic.."
twitch chat
October 2019

SUS

⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄πŸ”΄πŸ”΄πŸ”΄β¬›πŸ”΄β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄β¬›πŸ”΄πŸ”΄πŸ”΄πŸ”΄β¬›β¬› β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄β¬›πŸ”΄β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬› β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄πŸ”΄πŸ”΄πŸ”΄β¬›πŸ”΄β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄β¬›πŸ”΄πŸ”΄πŸ”΄πŸ”΄β¬›β¬› β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄β¬›πŸ”΄β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄β¬›β¬› β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄πŸ”΄πŸ”΄πŸ”΄β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄πŸ”΄β¬›β¬›πŸ”΄πŸ”΄πŸ”΄πŸ”΄β¬›β¬› ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
August 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Florida Mayhem McDonald's

twitchquotes: Guys, the color scheme of McDonald's consists of red, yellow, and white. It does not include blac k like Florida Mayhem. Stop spamming about how they are McDonald's already. It's untrue and unfunny.
twitch chat
March 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

MAURICIO HONORATO

twitchquotes: I have never seen a team with MAURICIO HONORATO lose a game.... I mean, he's perfect, incredible, good aim, intelligent, handsome... I honestly don't see MAURICIO HONORATO losing this game.
twitch chat
September 2018

Overwatch

The year is 2043 Covid variant phi beta epsilon is ravaging 0.0026% of the population

The year is 2043 Covid variant phi beta epsilon is ravaging 0.0026% of the population, you go outside for your government mandated 30 minute exercise, it's 1 a.m. not the best time, but they alternate your schedule so eventually everyone does get some sunlight. You quadruple mask and put on your plastic helmet. You gaze longingly at the sky. A man riding his bicycle points his flashlight at you "Why aren't you doing your stretches and cardio?" He asks, you recognize him as your neighbor (maybe, it's been some time since you last saw anyone). "It's because of people like you not obeying that the lockdowns have been extended another 4 years." He mumbles through his layers of masks. He reports you to AlphabetGoogle and your social credit score drops 5 points, good luck buying bread this week.
August 2021

COVID

Coronavirus

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