[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
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More Copypastas

Reynad was getting ready for his first HTC cast

twitchquotes: Reynad was getting ready for his first HTC cast. His palms were sweaty. Frodan sits next to him, "are you nervous Andrey?" Reynad wipes away his tears and says, "not anymore". They both smile and place their hands on each other's crotch under the desk. Reynad closes his eyes. KappaPride
twitch chat
March 2016
Reynad

Hearthstone

KappaPride

It's fucking astonishing Resident Evil was a successful franchise

twitchquotes: It's fucking astonishing Resident Evil was a successful franchise. Most of the series is mediocre or terrible. Out of the entire series 1/2/3/4/REmake/RER2 are classics. 5/7/Revelations 2 are really good. Revelations and the Outbreaks are cool. The rest are middling to trash. That includes all 3 Gun Survivor Games, Operation Raccoon City and Umbrella Corps, RE6, Resident Evil Gaiden, Code Veronica, Zero, and both Chronicles games. Plus all the phone garbage and the terrible films. Something having Resident Evil on it is like a 50/50 shot for quality.
twitch chat
February 2020

Among Us mini crewmate sitting

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣶⣿⣿⣷⣶⣄⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣾⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⡟⠁⣰⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⠏⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣼⣿⣿⡏⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣸⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠁⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢰⣿⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⠛⠉⢉⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⣿⣇⠀⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣤⣤⡀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠉⠉⠻⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠹⣿⣿⣇⣀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠉⠛⠋⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
November 2020

Among Us / Amogus

Chungus has no beginning. Chungus has no end

Chungus has no beginning. Chungus has no end. Chungus is infinite. Millions of years after our civilization has been eradicated and forgotten, Chungus will endure. Chungus is eternal. The pinnacle of evolution and existence. We are but rudimentary creatures of blood and flesh. We touch Chungus' mind, fumbling in ignorance, incapable of understanding. Organic life is nothing but a genetic mutation, an accident. Our lives are measured in years and decades. We wither and die. Chungus is eternal. Before it, we are nothing. Chungus imposes order on the chaos of organic life. We exist because Chungus allows it, and we will end because Chungus demands it. Chungus transcends our very understanding. We cannot grasp the nature of Chungus' existence.
March 2021
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