[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
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KRUSTY KRAB IS UNFAIR

twitchquotes: SwiftRage :loudspeaker: KRUSTY KRAB IS UNFAIR! SwiftRage :loudspeaker: MR. KRABS IS IN THERE! SwiftRage :loudspeaker: STANDING AT THE CONCESSION! SwiftRage :loudspeaker: PLOTTING HIS OPPRESSION! SwiftRage :loudspeaker:
twitch chat
November 2016

Classic

Anime girl excited

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠉⠉⠛⠻⢿⣿⠿⠛⠋⠁⠈⠙ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠴⣿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠈⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢁⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⣀⣿⠿⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣾⣿⠀⠀⠐⢦⡀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⣠⡾⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠻⠿⠿⠟⠛⠋⢷⣄⠀⠀⠹⣦ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠯⠶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣷⣤⡀⠘ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠑⠢⣀⠈⠢⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⣷ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⣀⠄⠒⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠢⡙⡳⣄⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡆⠀⠃⢀⡴⠚⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠱⠈⠳⡄⠀⠀⠀⢂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣾⡀⢐⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣴⡀⠁⠀⠙⢦⠀⠀⠈⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡏⠳⡈⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⣿⡿⠿⠽⠿⠿⣿⣷⣶⣌⡳⡀⠀⢹⣷⡄⠀⠀ ⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠑⢥⠀⠀⡾⠋⣰⡿⡟⠊⠀⠚⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⠀⠉⢹⠀⢳⠀⢸⣿⣿⡄⠀ ⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣇⠀⠀⠀⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡄⠀⠈⠀⠈⠀⠰⢻⠋⠀⣀⣀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠈⠀⠀⢃⢘⡏⢿⣿⡄ ⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠈⠣⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠋⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣼⡇⠈⢿⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⡆⠀⣿⠀⠀⡨⠂⠄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣀⠀⠀⠘⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⠿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠈⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⣐⠊⠀⠀⠀⢉⠶⠶⢂⠈⠙⠒⠂⠠⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠸ ⠀⣀⠂⢣⡀⠀⠀⠘⣠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣾⠷⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡀⡙⠀⠈⢧⠀⠡⡀⢉⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⡫⣋⣥⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡗⠃⠐⠀⠈⣷⡀⢳⡄⠂⠀⠀⣸⣿⡛⠑⠛⢿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡇⡀⠂⡀⠀⣸⢱⡈⠇⠐⠄⡠⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⡐⡀⠀⢠⠏⠀⢳⡘⡄⠈⠀⢿⡿⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣧⠐⢀⡏⠀⠀⠀⢳⡴⡀⠀⢸⣿⡄⠀⠉⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣶⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣆⠀⠐⡀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣷⡀⠀⠃⠙⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⠙⣄⠀⠀⠀⠱⣕⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠘⢦⡀⠀⠀⠈⢢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢄⠈⠻⣆⠀⠀⠀⠑⢄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿
May 2021

Weebs

GabeN says James is an ass

twitchquotes: James. We've had issues with James at previous events. Some Valve people lobbied to bring him back for Shanghai, feeling that he deserved another chance. That was a mistake. James is an ass, and we won't be working with him again.
twitch chat
June 2019

Classic

Dota 2

Haha Jonathan, You Are Banging My Daughter

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣤⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣴⣤⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠾⢿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠁⠤⣬⣽⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡄⠄⠄⢀⣽⣦⡎⠁⠒⠒⢻⣿⣿⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣧⡀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣧⣦⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⣠⣴⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⢸⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣝⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⣄⢺⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⠄⡀⠄⣸⣿⡿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⡆⠄⣀⣛⣫⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠇⠄⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠿⠽⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
May 2021

That's an extremely unfortunate loss Kripp

twitchquotes: That's an extremely unfortunate loss Kripp, even though you outplayed him on every possible level he still beat you, i've never seen anyone as unlucky as you that match, nor anyone as lucky as he was that match. It shouldn't even be legal for someone as bad as him to beat someone as amazing as you are at this game
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Classic

salty

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