[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Fortnite that's how Mafia works

twitchquotes: Fortnite. Fortnite. Fortnite. It was all my two kids talked about. They were utterly devoted to it. I had to make a change. I took the controllers and told them they couldn't play until they downloaded Mafia City. They whined and whined, but soon became engrossed in this amazing and educational game. Fortnite soon forgotten, their grades improved rapidly, much like their levels in game. The teachers were amazed, "how do they do it?" they asked me, I simply replied "that's how Mafia works."
twitch chat
January 2019

Ben Shapiro Olive Garden breadsticks

Let’s say that, hypothetically, you really did have unlimited breadsticks. Now, since they are unlimited, that means that you will never run out. However, on Earth there is a limited supply of the materials required to make breadsticks. Thus, if I were to attempt to eat as many breadsticks as possible, I would not be able to as eventually you would sell out, am I correct? Now that we have established that there are infinite breadsticks but finite supplies to make them, would it not be reasonable to conclude that you are either breaking the laws of physics, or are lying to me? And since one cannot break the laws of physics, logically you must be lying to me. Facts don’t care about your feelings liberals, you have committed the crime of false advertising and must give me free food or I will inform the authorities.
September 2020

Ben Shapiro

agontfHi emote

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠛⣉⣥⣤⣤⣶⣶⣶⣤ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢋⣡⣤⣶⣶⣶⣷⣶⣶⣭⣽⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠟⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣠⡿⠋⣉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟ ⢸⣿⣦⣝⢿⣿⢏⣴⣿⣄⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⡦⢩⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠈⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢙⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⠟⢠ ⠸⣿⣿⣿⣧⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡈⠄⢀⣀⣀⣙⣛⣛⡛⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢠⣿ ⡆⢿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠹⣿⣿⣿⣷⡸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣘⣵⣿⣿⢿⠹⣿⣿⡏⣼⣿ ⣧⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⠈⠙⣿⣿⣿⣮⣭⣭⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣃⣼⣾⣿⣿⡇⢻⣿ ⣿⣧⠉⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠈⢿ ⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠈ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄⢠⣿▄▄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⡻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄
March 2021
AgonTFT

Teamfight Tactics

Female Amogus Crewmate v2

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡴⠖⠛⠓⠲⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣏⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠘⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡿⠋⠉⠀⠈⠉⠻⣄⢹⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢧⣀⣀⡀⢀⣀⣤⣿⣿⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣉⠉⣉⢉⣠⣾⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠳⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⡠⠴⢿⣿⠋⠉⣹⠻⢿⣿⣿⣤⣴⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⡀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⡾⠛⠋⠀⢀⡞⠀⠀⠀⠛⠀⠀⢹⡟⠻⣿⣿⣧⣄⡀⠀⣶⣤⣤⠀ ⢠⣿⣷⣿⣿⠟⣛⣇⠀⠀⠀⣈⡷⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⡟⠉⠉⠉⠉⢉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⠛⠁⠈⠙⢷⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢉⠋⢁⣼⣏⣡⣤⣤⢐⣺⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁ ⠀⠙⠿⣿⣷⢤⣀⡀⢸⢿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠒⣄⠈⢡⣾⣉⡤⠚⣩⢴⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣷⣈⡙⠻⢿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡀⠈⠻⣯⡴⠋⣠⣾⡿⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢷⣿⢶⣤⣿⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠳⡄⠀⠙⢻⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠽⣿⣽⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠻⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣸⣿⡿⢻⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⠿⠀⠈⠻⣷⣿⣿⡇⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⡰⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
May 2022

Among Us / Amogus

Spending New Year on Twitch Chat

twitchquotes: No Friends BibleThump 👍 No Girlfriend BibleThump 👍 Spending New Year on Twitch Chat BibleThump 👍 Must be us chat BibleThump
twitch chat
January 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing