[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Hello. My name is Inigo Dongtoya

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ ͠ ͠°〜 ͜ʖ〜 ͠ ͠° ༽ノ¤=[———— Hello. My name is Inigo Dongtoya. You killed my Kappa. Prepare to die.
twitch chat
March 2015

Classic

greekWC emote

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣤⣤⣄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣇ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠭⠿⢿⡛⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣆⣀⣠⣤⣀⣤⣀⡌⢿ ⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣆⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠉⠉⠉⠿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣀⣀⣀⣹⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢫⣶⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠈⠉⠄⠄⠈⠛⠿⣿⠟⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣶⣾⣿⣷⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠄⠄⢀⢀⣠⣴⣿⣀⡀⠈⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠘⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⣈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢻⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣦⣭⡉⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠈⢻⡷⠁⣤⣶⣦⣄⠄⠈⠙⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣄⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣄⠄⠄⠄⠽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣤⣤⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
May 2019
Greekgodx

Shane Dawson tweet - i didnt fuck my cat

i didnt fuck my cat. i didnt cum on my cat. i didnt put my dick anywhere near my cat. Ive never done anything weird with my cats. I promised myself i wasnt going to make apology videos after last years thing so im just trying to be as short and honest with this as possible. (1/?)
March 2019

Classic

Mister I'm-too-boosted-to-read-my-chat

twitchquotes: FeelsRageMan Dear mister I'm-too-boosted-to-read-my-chat FeelsRageMan This will be the last message I ever send your ass FeelsRageMan
twitch chat
September 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

2 games 1 stream

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparrian, this is Twitch Staff. We have noticed that you are trying to become a hardcore player again, since you broke the laws of physics and play 2 games on 1 stream, when the laws of physics clearly says: "How can there be 2 games, when only 1 channel?". We hope that you will stop this, and become a casual player again. Please don't repost this. Thank you.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing