[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

I, as a heterosexual man

twitchquotes: I, as a heterosexual man, would never feel attraction to another man. Not even a slim, supple young lad with hyper feminine features in the most endearing cat outfit you could possibly imagine. That doesn't seem attractive to me at all. If you find pictures of men like this, you can just send them to me so I know what to watch out for and avoid.
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November 2020

You are now breathing and blinking manually

twitchquotes: monkaS YOU ARE NOW BREATHING AND BLINKING MANUALLY monkaS
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June 2017

THIS CHATROOM IS TRULY BLESSED BY ME

twitchquotes: ◟(∗❛ัᴗ❛ั∗)◞I'M THE SPAM-FAIRY AND THIS CHATROOM IS TRULY BLESSED BY ME ◟(∗❛ัᴗ❛ั∗)◞
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November 2014
TheRace

Hello Miguel Santander, this is your cat, Mellow Cat

twitchquotes: Hello Miguel Santander, this is your cat, Mellow Cat, I heard that you were complaining about my excesive meowing. I dont complain about having to hear you talk to yourself for 8 hours while playing that stupid game so I expect the same. Come here and feed me scrub CoolCat
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October 2015
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing