[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
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More Copypastas

Hospitals

twitchquotes: If 700,000 people die in hospitals every year. Why don't we close down these hospitals and prevent those deaths? (つ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)つ
twitch chat
April 2015
imaqtpie

Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?

twitchquotes: Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He pasta way. He just ran out of thyme. Here today, gone tomato. His wife is still upset, cheese still not over it. We never sausage a tragedy coming. Ashes to ashes, crust to crust. There’s just not mushroom for Italian chefs in today’s world. Want to know what the rough parts of Italy are called? The spaghetto. Don’t call yourself Italian if you weren’t baptized in marinara sauce. You are literally too stupid to insult.
twitch chat
November 2019

4House

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⢀⣀⡄⡀⠙⠿⣿⣿⡏⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⡁⠄⡓⡩⠐⠚⠲⣈⡢⣈⠛⢷⠄⠄⠄⠄⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠊⣴⠖⠂⣠⣶⣷⣄⡉⠸⠧⡵⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠋⡁⠐⢥⡚⠑⣁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠙⠉⣳⡀⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠟⠉⠠⣂⠔⠌⢀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡈⠣⠍⣶⠄⠉⠻⣿⣿ ⡂⢄⠒⠈⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠙⠒⡃⢀⠄⠙ ⠔⠄⠄⠈⠁⠄⠈⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠳⠄⠈⠉⠤⢳ ⣄⣤⣤⠘⠛⠛⠓⠄⣀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣤⡶⠿⠿⣷⣶⣤⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀ ⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⢠⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣠⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠈⠙⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⣸⣿⣿ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿ ⣤⣿⣿⣿⣯⣀⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠁⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⣆⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
February 2019

To protect the world from ad-vestation

twitchquotes: To protect the world from ad-vestation. TableHere To unite all adblockers within our nation. TableHere Jesse TableHere James TableHere Meowth's the name TableHere Team AdBlock blasts off at the speed of light! TableHere Surrender your revenue now or prepare to fight! TableHere
twitch chat
September 2018

Pokemon Marathon 2018

This is your long lost brother, Jokerc

twitchquotes: Hello Jokerd, this is your long lost brother, Jokerc. I have missed you so much, I hope you don't mind that I played your mage while you were sleeping? Also I told method that we shared the account lmao!
twitch chat
August 2019
JokerdTV
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