I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
This is exactly why I hate Twitch chat
twitchquotes:
This is exactly why I hate Twitch chat (Kripp specifically). This chat is pure, unadulterated, 100% stupidity. Nobody has a single unique, new thought, all spouting the latest meme after meme, that aren't even good. THIS is why I'm turning off chat and will just watch the professional gameplay. And I swear to god, if any of you copy and paste this, I'm deleting my account forever.
twitch chat
I hate Twitch Chat
President's Day Emoji Pasta
ITS PRESIDENTS DAY SLUTS!! ๐จ๐จ๐บ๐ธ๐บ๐ธ๐บ๐ธ๐บ๐ธtime to hop onto that founding father dick๐๐๐๐ด๐ป๐ด๐ป๐ด๐ป๐ด๐ปor should i say founding DADDIES!!!๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐๐๐
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๐ฆ๐ฆ out here tryna get rammed from behind ๐๐๐๐harder than the rock of MOUNT RUSHMOREโ๏ธโ๏ธโฐ๐๐george washington mightve been able to survive the harsh โ๏ธโ๏ธ๐ฌwinters๐ฌโ๏ธโ๏ธ of valley forge, but can he handle the conditions between the sheets๐ช๐โโโbe the monica Lewinsky ๐๐ปto my bill clinton๐โโ๏ธ baby and i wont deny i had ๐๐โ๏ธsexual relationsโ๏ธ๐๐ with you!!! crack the whip down harder on your bae than ronald Reagan did on welfare programs๐ธ๐ธ๐คท๐ผโโ๏ธ๐คท๐ผโโ๏ธ๐คท๐ผโโ๏ธโ๐ปsend this to FIVE of your baddest presidential PRINCESSES๐ธ๐ผ๐บ๐ธ๐บ๐ธ๐ธ๐ผwho will throw the nastiest neck๐๐๐ฉ๐ฉ๐๐๐ฌ๐ฆ on this AMERICAN BEAUT OF A DAY๐๐๐๐จโค๏ธ if you get 10 back, be prepared for the president to enter the oval office of you PUSSY tonight๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐บ๐ธ๐บ๐ธ๐บ๐ธ
Emoji Pasta
Holiday Emoji
President's Day
Together, we can save the universe
twitchquotes:
Hello Twitch, it is me, Goku. I need your help to create the ultimate Spirit Bomb so I can defeat Frieza, but I need your help. Raise your hands in the air and prove it by typing \o/. Together we can save the universe.
twitch chat
Forsen
All this mass market pasta is frankly embarrassing
twitchquotes:
All this mass market pasta is frankly embarrassing. Sure its easy to go grab a box of ready to cook ocean man emoji or witch mercy, but easy doesn't make it good. It honestly isn't that hard to make your own damn pasta at home, and with whatever quality ingredients you want. Want some ME SPAM? Just put it in there! Can anyone truly say they've participated in chat if they've never made their own pasta? I say no
twitch chat
HI FORSEN, IT'S YOUR FRIEND TRUMP HERE
twitchquotes:
HI FORSEN, ITS YOUR FRIEND TRUMP HERE. I NOTICE THAT YOU ARE NOT ABLE TO GET LEGENDARY ON HEARTHSTONE. I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW THAT FOR A LITTLE FEE OF $4.99 PER MONTH, YOU COULD LEARN TO BE GOOD AT HEARTHSTONE LIKE ME.
twitch chat
Forsen