[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
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January 2024

69 is so funny

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April 2020

For 5 years this Braum subs to Sneaky

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August 2019
Sneaky

League of Legends

NA Test IF YOU TOUCH THE DORITOS

twitchquotes: [NA TEST] DoritosChip IF YOU TOUCH THE DORITOS U ARE FAT PogChamp
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March 2017

Chat Test

Hopefully the FBI can find Jack Ma

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January 2021

WallStreetBets

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