I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Allu is a tactical genius
twitchquotes:
Allu is a tactical genius. He is best known for his signature tactic ”going B, but then benching AleksiB”. He also has a second little known tactic of ”going A, but then going home without any wins”. What an absolute legend. Top 3 IGL 4 sure.
twitch chat
CSGO
Is this chat filled with parrots?
twitchquotes:
Is this chat filled with parrots? All you guys do is copy what the person above you wrote. Please have some originality and contribute to a smarter chat.
twitch chat
I hate Twitch Chat
My SUSSY POWERS ARE AWAKENING
My SUSSY POWERS ARE AWAKENING 😱😎
Part 1. I just did my daily jackoff ☺️ to my impostor body pillow, 😱 but when I came, 👻 I started floating, 😱 and think I got teleported into the skeld. 😮 I swear for a second I felt the imposter's strong hands grip my asscheeks.🤤 🍑 🍑 I immediately was transported back to earth, 😭 and I instantly got on all fours on my bed naked, 🤪 as you would, and started screaming in my best efforts to summon the imposter 💪
“IM READY FUCK ME FUCK ME FUCK ME FUCK ME PLEASE DADDY IMPOSTER”
I was so close to feeling the imposters sweet cock fuck the shit out of me 🤤 but then my NAZI RACIST mother came in and beat the shit out of me. 😔😒🙁☹️
She then said I was going to a magical place called the “mental asylum” 
I’m not too sure where that dimension is located but it sounds EPIC 😮
I’m not too sure where that dimension is located but it sounds EPIC 😮
Among Us / Amogus
Teddy Roosevelt messages Kripp
twitchquotes:
Hi Kripp, This is Teddy Roosevelt calling! I am concerned that you have formed a monopoly on the hearthstone section of twitch dot telly. You must renounce this darkness immediately or I will SMITE YOU like I did Andre Carnegie and Nelson Rockemsockem. You must give up your monopolistic ways or face the mighty wrath of the White House and the US Judicial system. Much love to Rania and the baby. Regards, yo boi TD
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
$19 Fortnite card
Ok.. $19.00 Fortnite card.
Who wAnts it?
And yes, I'm giving it away.
Remember: SHARE. SHARE
SHARE.
..and Trolls... DON'T GET BLOCKED!