[Copypasta] I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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And you thought there wouldn't be any bees in chat

twitchquotes: โ–‘Aโ–‘nโ–‘dโ–‘ โ–‘yโ–‘oโ–‘uโ–‘ โ–‘tโ–‘hโ–‘oโ–‘uโ–‘gโ–‘hโ–‘tโ–‘ โ–‘tโ–‘hโ–‘eโ–‘rโ–‘eโ–‘ โ–‘wโ–‘oโ–‘uโ–‘lโ–‘dโ–‘nโ–‘tโ–‘ โ–‘bโ–‘eโ–‘ โ–‘aโ–‘nโ–‘yโ–‘ โ–‘bโ–‘eโ–‘eโ–‘sโ–‘ โ–‘iโ–‘nโ–‘ โ–‘tโ–‘hโ–‘iโ–‘sโ–‘ โ–‘cโ–‘hโ–‘aโ–‘tโ–‘ bUrself
twitch chat
May 2016
Forsen

If the human body is 75% water...

twitchquotes: If the human body is 75% water, how can you be 100% salt? Kappa
twitch chat
September 2015
Reynad

salty

Yeah I'm a big deal, I start memes in chat

twitchquotes: WTF DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME YOU LITTLE SHIT?! I'll have you know i've started more memes in this chat than any man living. You think you got what it takes to go toe to toe with me? You don't. You're nothing. Your just a little Pleb in the wind, less than insignificant. I scrape more important shits of my sheets in the morning. Yeah i'm a big deal, i start memes in Twitch chat, so copy my pasta or step off, kid.
twitch chat
November 2016

I'm Tanner jr. btw!

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, I just turned 5 years old! My dad says I'm pretty good at this game at that I should watch your stream to learn how not to play bad. He says he stole your high school girlfriend. Oh yeah, I'm Tanner Jr. btw! Nice to meet you!
twitch chat
May 2019
Kripp

Tanner from High School

My friend Kappa needs your help

twitchquotes: Hello, my name is Keepo and I want to ask you something. My friend Kappa needs your help. He wants to find some more Kappa friends. So please, spam Kappa as much as possible in the chat, so that my friend Kappa could find more of his Kappa friends. It makes a big difference, thank you!
twitch chat
August 2014
Pokimane
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