[Copypasta] Peeing with a boner is more difficult than giving birth

According to my scientific studies, Peeing with a boner is more difficult than giving birth. I am being 100 percent serious when I say this. This shouldn't even be an unpopular opinion, people just don't think about what the word "difficult" actually means. Peeing with a boner is more difficult than giving birth. Giving birth is definitely more painful, but pain by itself does not make something difficult. For example, putting my hand in a fire is not difficult, but it would hurt a lot. In order for something to be difficult, there has to be some chance of failure due to lack of skill, practice, or technique. Peeing with a boner often requires creative problem solving skills, especially in small spaces. There is no creative problem solving aspect of giving birth. Additionally, the way humans have evolved for these two actions supports my point. Giving birth is a natural process, which humans have evolved to be able to do. The female body is literally designed so that it can give birth with the lowest possible chance of error. The only real error that can happen is a miscarriage, which is also a natural occurrence, not a failure that occurs due to a lack of skill in giving birth. The male body, on the other hand, has evolved specifically so that peeing with a boner is very difficult. The only purpose for having a boner is to impregnate a woman, so the male body evolved to prevent urination during sex. On top of the difficulty in simply getting the pee to flow, there's the issue of actually positioning yourself so that the boner is pointing into the toilet bowl (urinals are much easier, but not always an option). In the past, I have had to give up and wait until my boner goes away because it was simply too difficult to actually pee in the toilet. There has never been a case where a woman has tried to give birth after being pregnant for nine months, not been able to do it, and said "fuck it" and waited 3 more months to try again because it would be easier the second try. Giving birth happens, every single time, because it's a natural process - peeing with a boner is the opposite.
May 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Please top switching the first 2 letters of words

twitchquotes: Dear chat, please top switching the first 2 letters of words; thereby forming a new or complety bogus word. For example in the two word sentence: "MIC MUTED". I and manny others have no idea what this means because you have switched the M with M and the M with the M. This confuses me to infinity. Thanks in advanced.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Ben Shapiro ordering pizza

Hello, is this Pizza Hut? Excellent. My name is Ben Shapiro. Conservative thought leader. Prominent white YouTuber. The Muggsy Bogues of the intellectual dark Web. And—look, it’s just a fact—I would like to order some pizza pie. If you are triggered by that request, I do not care. I truly do not. Now let’s discuss conditions. First, thank you for agreeing to debate me. Typically, in fora such as this, I am met with ad-hominem mudslinging, anything from “You racist creep” or “Is that your real voice?” to raucous schoolyard laughter and threats of the dreaded “toilet swirly.” However, your willingness to engage with me over the phone on the subject of pizza shows an intellectual fortitude and openness to dangerous ideas which reflects highly on your character. Huzzah, good sir. Huzzah. Second, any pizza I order will be male. None of this “Our pizza identifies as trans-fluid-pan-poly”—no. Pizza is a boy. With a penis. It’s that simple. It’s been true for all of human history, from Plato to Socrates to Mr. Mistoffelees, and any attempt to rewrite the pillars of Western thought will be met with a hearty “Fuh!” by yours truly. And, trust me, that is not a fate you wish to meet. Now. With regard to my topping preference. I have eaten from your pizzeria in times past, and it must be said: your pepperoni is embarrassingly spicy. Frankly, it boggles the mind. I mean, what kind of drugs are you inhaling over there? Pot?! One bite of that stuff and I had to take a shower. So tread lightly when it comes to spice, my good man. You do not want to see me at my most epic. Like the great white hero of Zack Snyder’s classic film “300,” I will kick you. Onions, peppers—no, thank you. If I wanted veggies, I’d go to a salad bar. I’m not some sort of vegan, Cory Booker weirdo. And your efforts to Michelle Obama-ize the great American pizza pie are, frankly, hilarious. Though not as funny as the impressively named P’Zone—when I finally figured out that genuinely creative pun, I laughed until I cried and peed. A true Spartan admits defeat, and I must admit that, in this instance, your Hut humor slayed me, Dennis Miller style. And, with that, you have earned my order. Congratulations. Ahem. Without further ado, I would like your smallest child pizza, no sauce, extra cheese. Hello? Aha. A hang-up. Another triggered lib, bested by logic. Damn it. I’m fucking starving.
August 2021

Ben Shapiro

xqcS

⡿⣝⢮⢯⢾⢽⢽⢯⣟⣿⣻⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡯⣺⢕⡏⣗⢽⢽⢽⢞⡗⢯⢛⠚⠟⠻⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣫⢺⣸⣪⡳⣝⢕⢕⢵⣱⣣⡧⣇⣦⣢⣀⠄⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡪⣓⢮⢾⡽⣮⢧⡣⡣⡑⠩⢙⣯⡃⠑⠙⠳⣆⡀⠈⠹⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡪⡮⡯⡯⣿⢽⣯⣿⣺⢼⢜⡴⣝⢇⢀⠄⡀⢠⢩⠪⡢⣀⢉⠻⡿⣿⣿⡿⡿⢡ ⡪⡺⡺⡽⣽⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⣳⣷⢷⣕⡕⣕⢕⡑⡜⡜⣵⣷⣿⣯⡳⣝⢰⣿ ⡪⣳⡫⡿⣽⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣽⣗⣯⣯⣾⡾⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⡅⢸⣿ ⢪⢒⢭⢯⣻⣻⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢃⣼⣿ ⢕⢱⠱⡕⡯⡷⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣟⢟⠏⠏⡏⣟⡽⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢉⣾⣿⣿ ⢕⢕⢱⢱⢱⡹⡕⡗⠯⡳⡫⡯⣎⢆⠄⢔⢝⣾⣿⣽⡳⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⠕⡌⡆⡧⣣⢧⡀⡨⣐⢈⠪⡚⢎⢗⢝⢌⢎⠯⢿⢿⡯⣷⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡱⢨⢪⢯⣞⣗⡷⣝⢜⣼⣿⣬⣦⣣⣕⣕⣆⡇⠅⡀⠉⠓⡯⣿⢿⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠨⢊⢮⢳⡳⡳⡯⡿⣽⢾⣝⢿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⣾⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠈⠠⢱⢱⢝⢝⢎⢯⡺⡽⣺⢽⢕⡏⡗⠕⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣀⣀⣀⣃⣃⣋⣓⣓⣑⣙⣊⣓⣙⣘⣊⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2019
xQcOW

Creeper

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September 2020

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February 2022
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