[Copypasta] I fell asleep masturbating with the curtains open and porn playing

I thought it would be nice to nut before i slept and before my sleeping pill kicked in and my room was dark so I figured why close the blinds. I was lubing up my cock with silicone lube, felt really good and got my cock really hard and was enjoying what I was watching. Next thing I realized, I wake up at 11am, dick in hand with lube, lube spilled all over my body and sheets and porn still playing and the neighbors can clearly see what happened. I live in an apartment area, and at the first floor so everybody next door saw everything. The neighbor right in front of me was having lunch and raised his glass to say cheers to me and smiled. Advice: cover all your bases before jerking off, and don't jerk under the influence.
April 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Kripp, this is the value-police

twitchquotes: (▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿) Kripp, this is the value-police. We are under the impression that you have 1 too many Priestesses of Elune in your deck, please fix this or come with us.(▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)
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November 2014
Kripp

VEGAN COPY PASTA

twitchquotes: One day I was watching Kripp and I wanted to be cool like everyone in chat, so I made my own copy pastaroni. Here it is guys. I tried my hardest to be witty, clever, and funny. This what I like to call VEGAN COPY PASTA. Please copy and paste as much as you like, as it is not only entertaining but also healthy for you!
twitch chat
January 2017
Kripp

I'M PIICCKKLEE RIIICKK

twitchquotes: 🥒 IM PIIICKLE 🥒 RIIIIIICK!!! 😂 👌 💯 🥒 IM PIIICKLE 🥒 RIIIIIICK!!! 😂 👌 💯 🥒 IM PIIICKLE 🥒 RIIIIIICK!!! 😂 👌 💯
twitch chat
March 2018

Rick and Morty

Dick Butt v2

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⠤⢤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠎⠀⠀⠀⠘⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⡖⢦⣰⣿⢲⠸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢨⠻⢷⣟⠙⠿⠞⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠦⠤⠷⠶⠶⠂⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡆⡄⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠃⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⡇⢸⣇⡀⠀⠀⡠⠁⢠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠃⢻⠈⠈⠉⢙⣳⣥⣄⣀⠔⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡆⠀⠀⠰⣧⣶⠌⠂⠀⠀⠉⠁⠀⠀⠉⠳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⢦⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢀⣀⡠⠚⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠉⡹⠉⠉⠉⠉⢉⠇⢠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⡉⠑⠁⢠⠃⠀⠀⣟⠓⠋⢠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠒⠁⠀⠀⠀⠈⠓⠒⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
July 2022

HeyGuys

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣶⣾⣿⣶⣦⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠻⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣅⣀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣹⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢽⠟⠁⠰⠿⠻⢾⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⠒⡌⠱⣀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣴⠊⠀⣤⡀⣼⣶⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⡇⠀⠀⠃⠀⠀ ⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠙⠉⠉⠁⠝⢹⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⠀⠃⠀⠀⢰⢠⢢ ⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣀⠈⠒⠒⢡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠈⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠆⠸ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠉⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡆ ⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⠀ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠁⠀ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠃⠃⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀
September 2020
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