[Copypasta] I fell asleep masturbating with the curtains open and porn playing

I thought it would be nice to nut before i slept and before my sleeping pill kicked in and my room was dark so I figured why close the blinds. I was lubing up my cock with silicone lube, felt really good and got my cock really hard and was enjoying what I was watching. Next thing I realized, I wake up at 11am, dick in hand with lube, lube spilled all over my body and sheets and porn still playing and the neighbors can clearly see what happened. I live in an apartment area, and at the first floor so everybody next door saw everything. The neighbor right in front of me was having lunch and raised his glass to say cheers to me and smiled. Advice: cover all your bases before jerking off, and don't jerk under the influence.
April 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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monkaHmm

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Lucina is a deep, complex, and intricate

twitchquotes: Lucina is one of the most deep, complex, and intricate characters in fighting game history and Zackray is an absolute hero for gracing us with his iteration of her
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Super Smash Bros

A baby to listen to every night

twitchquotes: I sleep with your stream on every night. I used to be married, you know? She left because she can't stand your voice. I chose you. I'll always choose you, because if I can't have kids with the love of my life, at least I'll have a baby to listen to every night. BabyRage
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⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣷⡤⠈⠉⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠁⢤⣾⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠻⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
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Kripp's stream is like watching paint dry

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Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing