[Copypasta] I fell asleep masturbating with the curtains open and porn playing

I thought it would be nice to nut before i slept and before my sleeping pill kicked in and my room was dark so I figured why close the blinds. I was lubing up my cock with silicone lube, felt really good and got my cock really hard and was enjoying what I was watching. Next thing I realized, I wake up at 11am, dick in hand with lube, lube spilled all over my body and sheets and porn still playing and the neighbors can clearly see what happened. I live in an apartment area, and at the first floor so everybody next door saw everything. The neighbor right in front of me was having lunch and raised his glass to say cheers to me and smiled. Advice: cover all your bases before jerking off, and don't jerk under the influence.
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠴⠒⠛⠉⠙⠳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣴⣾⣿⣷⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀⡤⠟⠚⠛⠛⠓⡆⠀⢷⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠳⣄⠸⣇⡀⠀⣀⣀⣰⡇⠀⢸⠓⢲⡀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣤⣤⣼⠆⡟⠻⠿⠿⠿⠟⠁⠀⢸⡇⢰⡇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⢸⠇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣧⣸⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⢻⠀⢀⣀⣀⣴⠀⠀⠀⢹⠅⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⡏⠀⠀⢸⡇⣿⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣠⣼⣿⣦⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⡇⠀⠀⢸⡇⣿⠀⠀⠀⣼⠀⠀⠀ ⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⣿⠀⠀⢸⡇⢸⠀⠀⠀⡿⠀⠀⠀ ⠈⠉⠁⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢿⠀⠀⣸⠁⢸⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠀⠀⢸⡄⠀⣯⠀⣸⠀⠀⢰⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢯⠀⠘⡇⢹⡆⠀⠸⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⢠⡇⢸⡇⠀⢰⠇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⣼⠀⠀⡇⠀⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢶⣯⣭⠤⠿⣠⣖⣃⣀⣹⡄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⠹⠿⢿⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀
November 2021

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Copypasting tomfoolery

twitchquotes: Hello friends, I recently lost my job and am unemployed. Twitch chat has been my safe haven during this time. I come to this stream today and what do I see? Copypasting tomfoolery. Please, have respect for the intellectuals here and return to the days of glorious discussion in twitch chat.
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Text-to-Speech Playing