I thought it would be nice to nut before i slept and before my sleeping pill kicked in and my room was dark so I figured why close the blinds.
I was lubing up my cock with silicone lube, felt really good and got my cock really hard and was enjoying what I was watching.
Next thing I realized, I wake up at 11am, dick in hand with lube, lube spilled all over my body and sheets and porn still playing and the neighbors can clearly see what happened.
I live in an apartment area, and at the first floor so everybody next door saw everything. The neighbor right in front of me was having lunch and raised his glass to say cheers to me and smiled.
Advice: cover all your bases before jerking off, and don't jerk under the influence.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Sneaky goes 8th in TFT 8 times in a row
twitchquotes:
After going 8th 8 times in a row, "Patient 8" hits his head on the wall 8 times in quick succession. The patient only communicates to his "chat"; a bunch of random sentences strung together to find out what will make the patient communicate. The word "Meteos" seems to trigger some sort of erotic response in the patient.
twitch chat
Sneaky
Teamfight Tactics
Putin v3
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⠄⠄⠄⠄⡇⡇⡂⢢⢣⢣⠨⡂⡊⢔⢕⢱⡱⡝⣜⢝⡺⣜⡵⣝⢮⡳⡽⣵⣻⡺⣼⡺⡵⣳⢝⡮⡃⡕⡺⢄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
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⠄⠄⠄⣕⢵⢣⢣⢑⢅⢆⢃⠢⠡⡡⡱⡱⡹⡪⡯⣺⢕⡯⣫⢯⢾⢽⢽⣺⢯⣗⡯⣗⣗⢗⣝⢮⡫⣏⢮⢒⢅⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
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⠄⠄⢀⡃⡫⢔⢨⢕⢕⢔⢌⢌⠢⡑⡱⡘⢜⢜⢮⡳⣝⣞⢵⣫⢿⢽⣺⡽⡾⣾⢽⣳⢯⢮⡳⣝⣕⢗⢵⡑⡕⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠐⠢⡱⡐⢕⢵⣑⡑⢕⢐⠕⠸⠰⡑⠕⢕⢕⠽⡕⣏⢗⢽⢝⢽⠺⠽⠽⢽⢻⢽⢽⢵⢽⡸⣪⢳⢱⢱⡱⡽⡡⡀⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠨⠈⢆⢊⢎⢖⢂⠃⠡⠐⠈⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢑⢹⢘⣜⢕⠑⡈⠄⡈⣈⣐⠨⠘⡜⢕⡳⣝⢮⡳⡱⡱⡵⡯⡪⠂⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠅⢂⠑⡕⡕⠄⡢⢀⠄⠠⠄⠁⠁⡌⠠⢠⠄⠸⣸⣺⡪⣐⠅⢢⢈⠄⢬⢍⣆⢧⣳⡽⡮⣺⡪⡺⣘⢼⣝⠆⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠨⡢⡢⡣⡳⢑⢰⢐⠠⡊⡪⣢⡣⡪⡰⠑⡀⠨⣪⢷⣝⡮⡫⡪⣪⢾⢝⣯⢾⣝⣗⡯⣟⢮⡪⡯⡷⣗⡯⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⢕⠄⡇⡣⡑⠔⢅⠇⡇⡏⡖⡕⡕⣌⢂⠂⠌⢮⢷⡳⡯⡯⡾⡵⣫⢯⢞⣗⡷⡯⣯⡳⣱⢱⢝⡽⣺⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠡⡡⢱⢐⠨⠨⠐⡡⢃⢇⢇⡏⡞⡔⡐⠠⢑⢽⢽⢽⢽⢽⢽⣝⢗⡯⣟⢾⢽⢝⡞⣜⢜⢜⣽⣺⠎⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠊⠃⠂⡐⠄⠅⡐⡈⡢⡃⢇⠕⡢⠄⠨⢘⢮⢯⢯⣳⡫⡗⣗⢽⢝⡮⡯⡮⡣⡏⣎⢎⠞⠺⠊⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠂⡁⢂⠐⡈⡢⢑⠅⡕⡐⠈⠨⡨⢯⣻⢽⣺⢺⡺⡪⣏⢷⢽⢕⣯⡫⣞⢜⢜⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡁⠄⠄⠂⡂⠌⠄⢕⢐⠌⢄⠄⠨⠨⢘⢥⢅⡵⣝⣝⢮⡳⡽⣝⡮⣺⢪⢎⣗⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢂⢀⠡⠄⠌⠌⢂⢂⠪⠐⡌⢰⢰⢘⢼⢝⣞⢞⣞⡵⡯⣞⢵⣫⢮⡳⡣⡳⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠐⠄⠊⠄⠨⠐⠠⠈⠌⠘⠜⠵⡢⢳⢹⢜⢕⠕⠱⡹⡪⡳⣕⣳⢹⡸⠅⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
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⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣇⠄⠐⠠⠄⠁⠄⠡⢀⢂⢅⢔⢄⣆⣆⢕⢵⡹⣪⡳⣕⢵⢱⢕⢇⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠱⡿⣵⣀⠄⠄⠄⠈⠨⠨⡂⢇⢎⢕⢎⢞⡽⡵⣝⢮⢺⢸⠸⡘⣜⢼⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣺⣳⣧⣄⡀⠄⠄⡀⠂⠌⡂⠕⢌⠊⢎⠪⠪⠪⡊⡆⣕⣕⢧⣓⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
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⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠁⠠⠄⠄⠄⠈⠽⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
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Black Lives Matter logo
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⠀⠀⣴⣿⡟⠃⠀⠀⠀⣰⣶⣮⣝⡻⢡⣿⣿⣿⡆⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣦⠀⠀
⠀⣼⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣮⠹⢋⣾⣿⣷⡄⡀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣧⠀
⢰⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⡿⠎⣛⣿⣿⡟⣰⣿⣿⡿⢋⣼⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⡆
⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠨⣭⣘⡿⣿⢟⣵⣿⣿⠿⠋⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿
⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡘⣿⣿⣷⣝⢿⣿⣵⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡌⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿
⠸⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠎⢿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⠇
⠀⢻⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⣾⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⡟⠀
⠀⠀⠻⣿⣧⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢃⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣼⣿⠟⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣶⣀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣀⣾⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠻⣿⣿⣶⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⠟.
Bad at video games. Get good.
twitchquotes:
Hello Streamer. I would like to tell you a story. I am a 44 year old women from Colombia. My babby is 14 yaer old and has ligma so he cannot play vidya games. Everi day he must roll his wheelchair to school where he is bullied because of his condition. When he comes home he has no friends to play with, so the only thing he can do is to watch your stream. Because at least then he will feel good about his life since you are so fucking bad at video games. Fucking loser. Get good.
twitch chat
Shia LaBeouf "Just Do It"
DO IT, just DO IT! Don’t let your dreams be dreams. Yesterday, you said tomorrow. So just. DO IT! Make. your dreams. COME TRUE! Just… do it! Some people dream of success, while you’re gonna wake up and work HARD at it! NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE!You should get to the point where anyone else would quit, and you’re not gonna stop there. NO! What are you waiting for? … DO IT! Just… DO IT! Yes you can! Just do it! If you’re tired of starting over, stop. giving. up.