I thought it would be nice to nut before i slept and before my sleeping pill kicked in and my room was dark so I figured why close the blinds.
I was lubing up my cock with silicone lube, felt really good and got my cock really hard and was enjoying what I was watching.
Next thing I realized, I wake up at 11am, dick in hand with lube, lube spilled all over my body and sheets and porn still playing and the neighbors can clearly see what happened.
I live in an apartment area, and at the first floor so everybody next door saw everything. The neighbor right in front of me was having lunch and raised his glass to say cheers to me and smiled.
Advice: cover all your bases before jerking off, and don't jerk under the influence.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Qtpie, this is your dad here
twitchquotes:
qtpie, this is your dad here. i just wanted to say how proud of you i am son, always hiding in your room playing your video games, talking to your internet friends. your mom and i think that's swell and we just wanted to let you know we love you. pls no copy dadderino
twitch chat
imaqtpie
League of Legends
You need a high IQ to understand Rick and Morty
To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Rick and Morty truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rick's existencial catchphrase "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Harmon's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. ๐ And yes by the way, I DO have a Rick and Morty tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
Rick and Morty
Classic
Empirical data suggests this is a QTpie stream
twitchquotes:
AH! White shirt! Gray screen! Empirical data suggests this is a QTpie stream.
AH! White shirt! Gray screen! Empirical data suggests this is a QTpie stream.
twitch chat
imaqtpie
League of Legends
This is my very first copy pasta
twitchquotes:
Hey guys. This is my very first copy pasta and I am really nervous about pasting it because if it does not get copy pasta then I will have much embarrassment. I've have thinking about it for a couple of nights now, but here it is!.
twitch chat
Classic
LS aka "Leaked Script"
twitchquotes:
LS aka "Leaked Script" is a genius caster/commentator in the LCK and self-declared coach, who is specifically known for predicting picks during draft and his spot-on analysis, all thanks to his ability to read the script.
twitch chat
imls