[Copypasta] I fell asleep masturbating with the curtains open and porn playing

Wife wants to leave me because of an NFT diamond ring

My wife loves new technology and is into cryptocurrency and so I thought it would be thoughtful to buy her a diamond ring as a NFT. I spent about 3 ETH which is like $12000 CAD. So when she got home from work I told her I had a surprise for her. I put a blindfold on my wife and guided her into our room where our computer is set up. Soon as she opened her eyes and saw what it was, she absolutely exploded with rage saying I was an asshole and was only thinking about myself. She then accused me of spending money on stupid thing and said she’s going to go find a boyfriend. I don’t know what to do in this situation. I was only thinking about HER interests and how happy she would be to receive this new technology. Plus the price of her ring will only appreciate. Stupid real diamonds only depreciate. We have now signed up for NFT relationship counselling. I have been seeking relationship advice but everyone says to buy her NFT flowers or NFT chocolates. And when I did that, that was the last straw. Wife sent me divorce papers and I converted it into NFT. I know in the long run when all these NFT’s moon. She will come crawling back.

February 2022

I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said

Hi there! My name is Michael Grover, and I am an explorer. Ever since I’ve been little, I’ve loved searching for new things. As a baby, my parents kept finding me in nooks and crannies around the house. “On the search” as they would say. By the age of 5, I had been to every continent on the planet, barring Antarctica. For my 12th birthday, my parents got me diving lessons, and by the time I was 13, I could scuba dive to a depth of 40 meters, as well as go cave diving. I got a pilot’s license by the age of 17, and I learned to sail just before my 18th birthday. Instead of going to university, I decided to travel around South America, exploring its rich jungles and beautiful landscapes. During my trip, I met my now wife who was also an explorer. For our honeymoon, we sailed around the Caribbean and we discovered 3 new islands which we named after the cats that I had growing up. Over the course of my life, I have come across great treasures and wondrous experiences. But in all my life, and in all my travels, I’m afraid I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said.

April 2021

Response to Sadge brother letter

twitchquotes: 📜 ✍ ️ Okayge

𝓑𝓻𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻 𝓘 𝓻𝓮𝓬𝓮𝓲𝓿𝓮𝓭 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓶𝓮𝓼𝓼𝓪𝓰𝓮 𝔀𝓮𝓵𝓵. 𝓘𝓽 𝓮𝔁𝓬𝓲𝓽𝓮𝓼 𝓶𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓲𝓷𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓶 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓪𝓫𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓪 𝓬𝓸𝓬𝓴 𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓮𝓻𝓿𝓮, 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓽 𝓷𝓸𝓽, 𝓬𝓸𝓬𝓴 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓫𝓮 𝓼𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝔀𝓪𝔂 𝓼𝓸𝓸𝓷.

twitch chat

August 2020

Forsen

NA REJOICE! UMA JAN IS HERE!

twitchquotes: NA REJOICE! UMA JAN has crossed the ocean to show you the light! UMA JAN will teach you that sidelanes exist! UMA JAN will teach you that you can win a game before 40 minutes! NA REJOICE! UMA JAN IS HERE!

twitch chat

July 2019

Riot Games

League of Legends

My donger is half my age

twitchquotes: ◕ ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡◕ ɪ ᴍ**ᴛᴜʀʙᴀᴛᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ɴɪᴠᴇᴀ ᴄʀᴇᴀᴍ ɴᴏᴡ ᴍʏ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀ ɪs ʜᴀʟғ ᴍʏ ᴀɢᴇ ͡◕ ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡◕

twitch chat

November 2014

Kripp

[Copypasta] I fell asleep masturbating with the curtains open and porn playing

Wife wants to leave me because of an NFT diamond ring

I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said

Response to Sadge brother letter

NA REJOICE! UMA JAN IS HERE!

League of Legends

My donger is half my age

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