So the wife and I were getting into it and she told me to talk dirty to her. So I called her a filthy slut.
She said “dirtier!” So I smacked her around and told her I was going to use her like the cheap whore she is.
She said “dirtier!” So I said “I’m gonna stick some SQQQ in your portfolio. I’m gonna put it in long and deep. I’m gonna fill you up with way OTM SPY puts.”
She then slapped me, packed a bag and took the kids. I think we’re getting a divorce.
I used to be a real ad
More WallStreetBets Copypastas
Daily stock prayer
Time for our daily prayer:
Our calls, Who art in PLTR,
Perfect be Thy Timing.
Thy tendies come.
Thy expirations be done,
on earth as it is in Wall Street.
Give us this day our daily Lambos.
And forgive us of our puts,
as we forgive those who buy puts against us.
And lead us not into Debt,
but deliver us unto tendies. Amen
WallStreetBets
GME revamp
GME should keep their retail stores but make it more of an experience like Hooters. Workers should be hot big tiddy goth girls or whatever other fetish gamers have. Bonuses if they have active social media (Instagram, Tik Tok, Only Fans, etc.) and extra bonus if they also stream on Twitch. 100% guaranteed increase traffic and sales in stores (simp farms). Literally cannot go tits up.
WallStreetBets
I just smashed my TV because of the SPY
I just smashed my TV in front of 30 guests at my house because of the SPY. My wife just took our crying kids and said they’re all spending the week at a hotel. This sub has ruined my life and my party. I can’t handle this anymore. Goodbye Powell. I am no longer a fan.
WallStreetBets
Ape rocket
💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎
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💎💎💎💎💎💎🚀🚀🚀💎💎💎💎💎💎
💎💎💎💎💎🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀💎💎💎💎💎
💎💎💎💎💎🚀🚀🐵🚀🚀💎💎💎💎💎
💎💎💎💎💎🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀💎💎💎💎💎
💎💎💎💎💎🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀💎💎💎💎💎
💎💎💎💎🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀💎💎💎💎
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💎💎💎💎💎💎🚀🚀🚀💎 💎💎💎💎💎
💎💎💎💎💎🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌💎💎💎💎💎
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WallStreetBets
I want JPow to use his full range of tools on me 😫
I want JPow to use his full range of tools on me 😫