twitchquotes:
📜 ✍️ 𝐼 𝓇𝑒𝑔𝓇𝑒𝓉 𝓉𝑜 𝒾𝓃𝒻𝑜𝓇𝓂 𝓎𝑜𝓊, 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇𝑒 𝒾𝓈 𝓃𝑜 𝒸𝑜𝒸𝓀 𝓁𝑒𝒻𝓉.
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What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Kripp and Arthus
twitchquotes:
Ｍｙ ｓｏｎ ｔｈｅ ｄａｙ ｙｏｕ ｗｅｒｅ ｂｏｒｎ， ｔｈｅ ｖｅｒｙ ｗｅｂｓｉｔｅｓ ｏｆ ｉｎｔｅｒｎｅｔ ｗｈｉｓｐｅｒｅｄ ｔｈｅ ｎａｍｅ： Ｋｒｉｐｐａｒｉａｎ．Ｍｙ ｃｈｉｌｄ， Ｉ ｗａｔｃｈｅｄ ｗｉｔｈ ｐｒｉｄｅ ａｓ ｙｏｕ ｇｒｅｗ ｉｎｔｏ ａ ｇａｍｅｒ ｏｆ ｈａｒｄｃｏｒｅｎｅｓｓ．Ｒｅｍｅｍｂｅｒ， ｏｕｒ ｆａｍｉｌｙ ａｌｗａｙｓ ｐｌａｙｅｄ ｈａｒｄｃｏｒｅ ｗｉｔｈ ｆｒｉｅｎｄｓ ａｎｄ Ｉ ｋｎｏｗ ｙｏｕ ｗｉｌｌ ｎｅｖｅｒ ｐｌａｙ ｃａｓｕａｌ ｓｃｒｕｂｃｏｒｅ ｓｈｉｔ， ｂｕｔ ｔｈｅ ｔｒｕｅｓｔ ｈａｒｄｃｏｒｅｎｅｓｓ ｉｓ ｍｙ ｓｏｎ ｉｓ ｔｈｅ ｅｎｔｅｒｔａｉｎｉｎｇ ｙｏｕｒ ｖｉｅｗｅｒｓ． Ｉ ｔｅｌｌ ｙｏｕ ｔｈｉｓ ｆｏｒ ｗｈｅｎ ｍｙ ｄａｙｓ ｃｏｍｅ ｔｏ ａｎ ｅｎｄ ｙｏｕ ｓｈａｌｌ ｎｏｔ ｂｅ ｃａｓｕａｌ．
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Kripp
Slap Chop commercial script
Now that I have your attention let me show you this handy new kitchen tool, the Slap Chop! You’re going to be in a great mood all day, because you’re going be slapping your troubles away with the Slap Chop. Now, look here’s a potato. One slap you got big chunks for stew, two slaps home fries in a second. And, look at this when you add a mushroom: the more you do it, the finer it gets you don’t have to switch any blades.
Now, you love salad -- you hate making it. You know you hate making salads -- that’s why you don’t have any salad in your diet. Watch this one slap... salad! I love Pizza too, but once in a while get the veggies in, at least throw it on top of the pizza.
You’re going to change your eating habits. Soup, Coleslaw, stuff we want, 5 seconds. 4 or 5 seconds, it's done. This thing, this tuna looks boring. Stop having a boring tuna, stop having a boring life. Add this tuna putting it in like this now you’re going to have a nice, tuna, salad. Look at this you’re going to have an exciting life now.
Look here’s a hard boiled egg. One chop, you add the pickle; you add the green onion. And what you can do is mix things together add the ham and you’re going to love this. You don’t have time to make breakfast, breakfast to go.
You’re going to love my nuts. Watch this: almonds, walnuts. Comes with a cover so you can do everything in the cover. Alright, or you can do it on the board, whatever you like. So easy, one finger, if I can do it with one finger you guys can do it with your whole hand. Kids can do it. You know what they charge at the ice cream store? A dollar for toppings at the ice cream store. Add a couple cookies if you want. So, you can make it for 10 cents. Stop throwing your money away. You know not only nuts what about fruit? Put a mango, look at that isn’t that beautiful on your ice cream.
Hello Kripp, Sandown's mother here, Sandup
twitchquotes:
Hello Kripp, Sandown's mother here, Sandup. I don't appreciate the excessive amount of brofisting you've been doing to my son's rectum. When he sleeps at night all he can dream about is you welcoming him to the "5 dolla club" as you tear his anus apart and cause it to profusely bleed with your fist and it's all your fault that he's so butthurt!
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Kripp
do u think that yoshi gets embarrassed
do u think that yoshi gets embarrassed when he poos out eggs in front of mario??? sorry if this ofends anyone but i thought it was a funny thing haha. and i would like to know if any of you have any pics of yoshi pooping an egg while he looks nervous or embarrassed i just want to see it for a few laughs haha. another thing i am wondering is what do you think the eggs smell like haha im just curious for laughs haha i would like to smell them
Super Smash Bros
Classic
Worry about a tree, miss the entire forest
twitchquotes:
ヽ( ͡°╭͜ʖ╮͡° )ﾉ And if you only worry about a tree, you'll miss the entire forest around it ヽ( ͡°╭͜ʖ╮͡° )ﾉ-Sage Dong
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Trump