twitchquotes:
π βοΈ πΌ ππππππ ππ πΎππ»πππ πππ, ππ½πππ πΎπ ππ πΈππΈπ πππ»π.
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I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
xQc trolls Among Us
twitchquotes:
Hey Chat, I am pretty sad that xQc trolls this game. He was such a good Crewmate before and now he is just ruining the game. If he don't want to play correctly he just should leave the lobby. I am actual really mad right now, maybe I even close the stream. I am very concerd that he is developing into a toxic Troll.
twitch chat
xQcOW
Among Us / Amogus
Tell us what's in the sandwich
twitchquotes:
ΜΏ ΜΏ'ΜΏ'Μ΅Π·=ΰΌΌ βΜΏΔΉΜ―βΜΏ ΜΏ ΰΌ½=Ξ΅/Μ΅/βΜΏβΜΏ ΜΏ ΜΏ[} ΜΏ ΜΏ ΜΏ ΜΏ^ tell us what's in the sandwich and nobody gets hurt kripp ΜΏ ΜΏ'ΜΏ'Μ΅Π·=ΰΌΌ βΜΏΔΉΜ―βΜΏ ΜΏ ΰΌ½=Ξ΅/Μ΅/βΜΏβΜΏ ΜΏ ΜΏ[} ΜΏ ΜΏ ΜΏ ΜΏ^
twitch chat
Kripp
Iβve been wondering if I might be a gay
Recently, Iβve been wondering if I might be a gay. It all started a week ago. I was sitting on the toilet, pooping, when all of a sudden, a big shit turd comes out of my ass. It was huge. Big big. Itβs so fucking big, I gotta look down into the toilet to check for blood. No blood, but the turd is fucking massive. I notice something strange about it. The end of the turd, sticking out of the water, looks like a dick head. A penis head. Needless to say, I was concerned. How could this be? I picked it up from the water, and put it back up my ass. To my surprise, it felt good. I then shit it back into the water. Splash. I then repeated this a few more times, moaning out βOscar Winning actor Anthony Hopkinsβ each time. I am not sure if I am now gay. My boyfriend says itβs completely normal, but heβs gay, so I canβt trust him.
I fucking hate gaming laptops
I fucking hate gaming laptops.
Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer's thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.
Foreign volunteers in Ukraine (variation of original chicken nuggets copypasta)
Holy shit. My commanding officer came into my barracks to bring me an MRE and I literally screamed at her and hit the plate of rations out of her hand. She started yelling and swearing at me in Ukrainian which I didn't understand and I slammed the door on her. I'm so distressed right now I don't know what to do. I didn't mean to do that to my superior officer but I'm literally in shock from the cruise missile strike. I feel like I'm going to explode. Why the fucking fuck is Zelenskyy losing? This can't be happening. I'm having a fucking breakdown. I don't want to believe the world is so corrupt that nato won't impose a no fly zone. I want a future to believe in. I want Zelenskyy to be president of a united Ukraine and fix this broken country. I cannot fucking deal with this right now. It wasn't supposed to be like this, I thought we had anti air coverage in western Ukraine???? This is so fucked.