twitchquotes:
π βοΈ πΌ ππππππ ππ πΎππ»πππ πππ, ππ½πππ πΎπ ππ πΈππΈπ πππ»π.
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Naughty fun
guys why when a woman gets a vibrator, its seen as a bit of naughty fun. BUT when a guy orders a 240 Volt FuckMaster Pro 5000 blowup latex doll with 6 speed pulsating ***, elasticized anus with non-drip semen collection tray, together with optional built in realistic orgasm scream surround sound system, hes called a pervert?
Classic
Alone in his heart, Reynard commits saltdoku
twitchquotes:
"Tides my player," say the Reynardino, "you are my slaverrino, why don't you make videos?" But the Tides don't respond. He elopes to C9 and runs his hand through his unshaven face scruff and say "Well met!" to the twisted Kolento. Alone in his heart, Reynard commits saltdoku at a Saltbucks in San Bernardino with Al Pacino, no cappucino.
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Reynad
Lenny face donger
Liberty Mutual Auto Insurance
twitchquotes:
πΆYou owned a car ππ for 4β°π
yearsβ°π. YouπΆ named itπ± Bradπ±. Youπβ€π lovedπBradππ. And then youπΆβ totaledβ π§ππ himπ¦. You two ππhad been through everything π¬togetherπ. π¬2 boyfriendsπ¬, π¨π§3 jobsπ«,β nothing βcould replaceπ± Bradππ. Then Liberty Mutualπππ calls, and you break into your πhappyπ πdanceπππ.
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80 billion dollars in twitch stocks
twitchquotes:
4 people broke into my house and held me hostage last night. Somehow they've heard I hold 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks and wanted me to withdraw it to a specific bank account. I had to explain for 2 hours how it's all fake money and that I've spent almost a week trading fake stocks just to gain nothing. They ended up calling me a fucking loser and left..
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