[Copypasta] WSB Buy $COCK

Buy $COCK. I heard WSB is buying $COCK and $COCK IS THE NEXT BIG THING. $COCK IS RISING TODAY. Do your own DD on $COCK and let me know how much you like $COCK. ๐Ÿ’ŽโœŠ your ๐Ÿš€๐Ÿš€๐Ÿš€ $COCK to the ๐ŸŒ‘
February 2021

WallStreetBets

(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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WSB Choose your fighter

Choose your fighter Alex Magikarp ๐ŸŸ Elon TechnoCuckLord ๐Ÿค–+๐Ÿคด Jeff Divorcedzos ๐Ÿ’” Salmonella ๐Ÿ” Nutella ๐Ÿซ Bill "HELL Giga GUH is coming" Clownman ๐Ÿคก Chamath, "I'm abouta fuck shit up" Papaya ๐Ÿˆ Ryan Cocken your butthole ๐Ÿฅ’๐Ÿ’ฆ ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ˜ณ ๐Ÿฅ’ Z ๐Ÿฅ’ U ๐Ÿฅ’ C ๐Ÿฅ’ C ๐Ÿฅ’ Tim ๐ŸŽ Bottom ๐Ÿ…ฑ๏ธENIS Jack Ma MIA ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™‚๏ธ Cathie "A prayer a day keeps the ๐Ÿปs' away" or "Jesus, take my buying power" Woods ๐Ÿ™โœ๏ธ
March 2021

WallStreetBets

Stimulus talks going well in 2946

The year is 2946, Robot Mitch McConnel and Cyborg Nancy Pelosi report stimulus talks going well. The Dow rewards them and hits 6.02 x 1023.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Daily WSB trader routine

1. Wake up 2. Check memfolio, buy more PLTR calls 3. Shit while looking at charts, donโ€™t wipe 4. Fomo and buy the top 5. Watch stock Plummet 6. Sell, watch stock go up 7. Go to WSB and downvote everything 8. Jerk off, nut, realize how empty you are 9. Stare at futures for 3 hours 10. Sleep & repeat
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Christmas for a wsb trader

As the tree blinks from white to red to green, you look at the void under the tree that previously held presents. Fewer this year than usual, but some. How did you get here? Boredom? In March, you felt trapped with your wife and infant. You needed something to pass the time. Something you could throw yourself into fully. โ€œAre you coming to bed?โ€ your wife yells down the stairs. It seemed harmless at first, but as the pandemic drew on, so did your investment. Youโ€™ll stop soon, though. โ€œSoon!โ€ you reply, and you hear her feet climb the steps. The lights start to blink chaotically. You cringe because you could only afford the junk strands at CVS. Suddenly they haltโ€”the alternation feature brokenโ€”on red. The red fills the room and covers your flesh. You look down at your hands, and they look like theyโ€™re bleeding. Like your calls. After a timeโ€”hours?โ€”you realize youโ€™re sitting in complete darkness. Your lights have expired, worthless.
December 2020

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My wife told me to talk dirty to her

So the wife and I were getting into it and she told me to talk dirty to her. So I called her a filthy slut. She said โ€œdirtier!โ€ So I smacked her around and told her I was going to use her like the cheap whore she is. She said โ€œdirtier!โ€ So I said โ€œIโ€™m gonna stick some SQQQ in your portfolio. Iโ€™m gonna put it in long and deep. Iโ€™m gonna fill you up with way OTM SPY puts.โ€ She then slapped me, packed a bag and took the kids. I think weโ€™re getting a divorce.
April 2021

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