[Copypasta] your streams lately have really helped me

twitchquotes: hey [streamer], your streams lately have really helped me with my depression, bleakness, dejection, distress, sorrow, my car trouble, my 401k, my grades, my slimp dick, my underperforming AMD driver, the armenian genocide, the galloping campaign, the war in the vietnamese, oh god they are in the trees, the battle of antietam, the housing crisis of 2008, the bankruptcy of greece in 2015, the explosion of chernobyl, my late grandma denise
twitch chat
December 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

I want to bang Timmy Nook from Animal Crossing

Holy fucking shit. I want to bang Timmy Nook from Animal Crossing so goddamn bad. I can't stand it anymore. Every time I go to Nook’s Cranny I get a massive erection. I've seen literally every rule 34 post there is of him online. My dreams are nothing but constant fucking sex with Timmy Nook. I'm sick of waking up every morning with six nuts in my boxers and knowing that those are nuts that should've been busted inside of Timmy Nook’s tight tanuki asshole. I want him to have my mutant human/tanuki babies. Fuck, my fucking mom caught me with a raccoon I found in the trash. I'd dressed him in my dad’s Hawaiian shirt and went to fucking town. She hasn't said a word to me in 10 hours and I'm worried she's gonna take away my Nintendo Switch. I might not ever get to see Timmy Nook again.
July 2021

Shrek 2

⢋⣴⠒⡝⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⣥⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣍⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿ ⢾⣿⣀⣿⡘⢿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠻⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠈⠙⢿⣦⣉⡁⠄⠄⣴⣶⣿⣿⢷⡶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡛⠛⠻⠃⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⣀⣀⣴⡟⢩⠁⠩⣝⢂⢨⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⡛⣳⣶⣤⡘⠿⢋⣡ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⣈⣱⣮⣿⣷⡾⠟⠋ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠿⠛⠛⣻⣿⠉⠛⠋⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠸⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡠⠄⢒⣤⣟⠿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣀⣀⣉⣉⣠⣽⣿⣟⠻⣿⣿⡆⢻ ⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠋⠉⣿⣿⣶⣿⣟⣛⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣼⣿⡇⣸ ⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⢿ ⡋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠂⠠ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⡿⠄⢈ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠛⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⡿⠟⢋⣴⣿⢿⡋⠄⠄ ⣠⣴⠶⠖⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣴⣾⣿⡿⢫⠞⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣆⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⢿⣧⣶⠏⠄
September 2020

Shrek

Kripp thinks that milk is bad for you

twitchquotes: My dad drank milk his whole life. One day my mom told him "If u want to see ur children graduate, u have to stop" 3 years later he died of calcium deficiency. My mom told me "Dont drink milk; dont put your family through this" At 24, I have never touched a glass of milk. I must say, I feel a sense of regret, because watching Kripp play Hearthstone gave me calcium deficiency anyway.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Teaching him how to throw so well

twitchquotes: Hey xQc my son is a huge fan of yours. Anyway over the past few days of watching you play this game hes got much better at playing baseball (he plays in the 11-13 year old division). I just wanted to stop by and thank you for teaching him how to throw so well.
twitch chat
October 2018
xQcOW

Overwatch

Spooky story

twitchquotes: One day there was Man. He wake up in night time like 3 or 4 am in the morning, Much sweat from nightmare of skeletons!! He turns on his computer and waited for the screen to load. "I will watch Kripparrian to calm my fears" he Mumbled. As he click the URL the stream loads... but there is only skeletons... Plz no creepy pasta this spooky story
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing