[Copypasta] Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Sneakily squeak until light of dawn

twitchquotes: When I fart Kripp feel the fart. He hard press A and D and try to avoid the fart. But Kripp smell the fart. My viscosity meter is always highest when Kripp in the room. We sneakily squeak until light of dawn. All becoming well met.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

STOP POSTING ABOUT SQUID GAME!

STOP POSTING ABOUT SQUID GAME! I'M TIRED OF SEEING IT, MY FRIENDS ON TIK TOK SEND ME MEMES, ON DISCORD ITS FUCKING MEMES. I was in a server, right? AND ALL OF THE CHANNELS ARE JUST SQUID GAME STUFF. I SHOWED MY NEW TRACKSUIT TO MY GIRLFRIEND AND I SAID "hey babe, I'm on squid game." HAHA MUGUNGHWA KKOCHI PIOTASEUMNIDA, I FUCKING LOOKED AT A MAN GETTING SHOT AND SAID, "Uh oh, he failed this game!" I LOOKED AT THE HEAD OF MY PENIS, I THINK OF THE SUPERVISOR'S MASK AND I GO "PENIS? MORE LIKE PENSUPERVISOR," AAAAAAAAA
November 2021

Squid Game

bro i’m more japan than you

twitchquotes: bro are you disrespecting my japanese culture bro i’m more japan than all of you because i watch anime and you don’t, i bet you don’t even know what Naruto is you degenerate. So before you message me acting like you know my culture maybe check yourself first
twitch chat
June 2019

Weebs

By the order of Donald of the house Trump

twitchquotes: SMOrc By the order of Donald of the house Trump SMOrc First of his name SMOrc True heir of these United States SMOrc Builder of Walls, Protector of the Border SMOrc I deport you from this chat
twitch chat
October 2016

Type !sellout to receive your free brofist

twitchquotes: Kripparrian is giving away TWO BROFISTS during this week’s Hyper X giveaway! Type !sellout to receive your free brofist or some RAM or whatever. Remember to subscribe, follow and no copypasta focaccia lasagna
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

sellout

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