Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
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More Copypastas
I heard-a you-a guys-a like-a da pasta!
twitchquotes:
(Β° ~ΝΚ~ Β°)I heard-a you-a guys-a like-a da pasta!(Β° ~ΝΚ~ Β°)
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Trick2g
God of War Kratos
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One time my mother called me a son of a bitch...
twitchquotes:
One time my mother called me a son of a bitch, so I hit her because no one talks trash about my mother, then I hit myself because no one hits my mother, she then hit me because no one hits her son and then hit herself because no one hits me, so I hit her because no one hits my mother. cant stop me
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Trump
EU COMING THROUGH v2
twitchquotes:
EU COMING THROUGH 
TRY AND EXTERMINATE A GROUP OF PEOPLE NEEDS AMERICA TO SAVE THEM STILL HAS A ROYAL FAMILY SOCIALISTS NO FREE SPEECH MARRY 16 YEAR OLDS STABBINGS IN EU
TRY AND EXTERMINATE A GROUP OF PEOPLE NEEDS AMERICA TO SAVE THEM STILL HAS A ROYAL FAMILY SOCIALISTS NO FREE SPEECH MARRY 16 YEAR OLDS STABBINGS IN EU
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Classic
EU vs NA
Called my overweight female friend a heckin chonker today and now she wonβt talk to me
My female friend was crying about how fat she was and I was trying to comfort her by telling her that she didnβt look that fat but she kept accusing me of lying to make her feel bad so I thought that saying βmaybe your just a heckin chonkerβ would cheer her up and lighten the mood but she just looked at me and left. I hope she realised that I was only being nice and that she is being irrational.