[Copypasta] Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
December 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

I am like a boomerang, I will always return

twitchquotes: Dear nazi mods. you may have permabanned my other account, but shitposting will always find a way. I will lie about how to make faces. I will accuse teams of 322. I will raise my dongers. So don't even waste your time banning me, because I am like a boomerang. I will always return. Pls no copy pasterino dongerino cappucino.
twitch chat
March 2014

MODS

YOU CAME TO THE WRONG CIRCUS

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜◯ ( ͡° ͜◯ ( ͡° ͜◯ ͡°) YOU CAME TO THE WRONG CIRCUS ( ͡° ͜◯ ( ͡° ͜◯ ( ͡° ͜◯ ͡°)
twitch chat
June 2015
Forsen

Die spider!

twitchquotes: ༼ ಠل͟ಠ༽︻デ=一 DIE SPIDER /ก็็็็็็็็็็็็็╲/\╭(▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)╮/\╱ก็็็็็็็็็็็็็\
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

CEO of Campbells Tomato Paste

twitchquotes: (▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿) Hello Kripp i am CEO of Campbells Tomato Paste. This stream is now under my control i bought all rights to paste and pastarino products if anyone copy and pastes again i will sue you so dont copy and paste (▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Tricky the Clown (Expurgation)

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⢻⠟⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⢿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠜⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠠⠒⠒⠒⠄⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠺⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠃⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣀⡴⠒⢺⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠩⠛⠒⠚⣲⠃⠂⠠⠐⠠⠐⡀⠈⡄⠀⠀⣀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢡⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠲⠠⢠⠀⠀⢀⠁⢀⠁⠈⠁⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⢶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⡐⠀⠀⠈⠑⠚⠄⡄⣄⣄⣶⣿⣿⠟⠛⠋⠉⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡆⠀⢀⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢙⣻⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣧⠀⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠤⣀⠀⠉⠙⢢⡀⠀⣹ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠓⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣷⠠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢣⡀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⢀⣶⣶⣦⠀⠀⠀⡇⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿ ⡿⠀⢀⡴⠺⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⠀⢸⣷⣾⠁⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⣶⣿⣷⣄⡀⠀⢈⡇⢂⠀⠒⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠈⠉⢙⣇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⣸⡇⠀⠈⠁⠂⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⡀⠀⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣰⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⡴⠶⠒⣿⠛⢻⠉⠁⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⡉⠁⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠘⢀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠒⣲⣿⠀⠀⠀⣀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
June 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing