Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Shalom my fellow Twitchlings
twitchquotes:
Shalom my fellow Twitchlings. My name is Herschel Goldstein, I hail from the ancient land of Israel. In this world there are two superior races: the valiant Japanese and the God-fearing Jews. When I met the great Kripp at Blizzcon 2013, he gave me a piece of advice that I will never forget: "Pentru a da oul omului, îl hrănești pentru o zi. Om învățat de ouă, îl va hrăni pentru o viață întreagă." Translated into foreign devil talk: I am coming Yankee scum. Get on board or get out of the way."
twitch chat
Kripp
I sexually Identify as your mom
twitchquotes:
I sexually Identify as your mom. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of cooking for your father and you and fuck your father and make you more sisters. People say to me that a person being your mom is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. im gonna marry your father. From now on I want you guys to call me " Mommy" and respect my right to cook food and fuck your father. If you can't accept me you're a mommyphobic and need to check if your mom is still alive. Thank you for being so understanding
twitch chat
I sexually Identify as
Cute squid
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣉⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⡟⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡌⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡟⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⢿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡇⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢸⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣇⢹⣿⡿⠋⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠿⣿⣿⡇⣸⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⡈⢿⣇⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣾⡿⢁⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⠟⢿⣷⡘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣴⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢃⣾⡿⠻⣿⣿
⡏⡄⠸⠟⠃⠈⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠻⣿⡿⠁⠘⠿⠇⢀⢹⣿
⡅⣿⣄⠀⣰⣾⣿⣷⡄⠘⠟⣡⣶⣿⣿⣦⠈⠁⠰⠿⠃⣠⣿⢸⣿
⣷⡹⢿⡀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⣴⣿⣿⡟⢁⡀⠀⢰⣤⣶⣾⣿⢃⣾⣿
⣿⣿⣦⣀⠸⣿⣿⡟⠃⠸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠘⣛⠂⠾⠿⢟⣋⣵⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡘⠿⣿⠰⣶⣍⣛⣛⣃⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
Hey NON Subs, Thanks for watching the ads for me
twitchquotes:
( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮ Hey NON Subs, Thanks for watching the ads for me ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮ ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮
twitch chat
Trump
plebs vs subs
I sexually idenfity as VapeNation
twitchquotes:
I sexually Identify as 
. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of filling the air with the fattest rips. People say to me that a person being is Impossible and I’m *** retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install cloudchasers, coils, and a battery on my body for the perfect vape. From now on I want you guys to call me “Lit” and respect my right to rip the fattest vapes. If you can’t accept me you’re a vapiphobe and need to check your privileges
. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of filling the air with the fattest rips. People say to me that a person being is Impossible and I’m *** retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install cloudchasers, coils, and a battery on my body for the perfect vape. From now on I want you guys to call me “Lit” and respect my right to rip the fattest vapes. If you can’t accept me you’re a vapiphobe and need to check your privileges
twitch chat