[Copypasta] Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
December 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

The mods are doing a good job

twitchquotes: The mods are doing a good job of stopping the copying and pasting trolls. It's a shame that people ruin an entire chat with their immature behavior. Go mods, keep up the good work!
twitch chat
March 2018

MODS

SPAM THIS COKE TO MAKE DYNASTY CHOKE

twitchquotes: SPAM DrinkPurple THIS DrinkPurple COKE DrinkPurple TO DrinkPurple MAKE DrinkPurple DYNASTY DrinkPurple CHOKE DrinkPurple
twitch chat
March 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

Sense of pride and accomplishment

twitchquotes: The 💰 intent 💰 is 💰 to 💰 provide 💰 players 💰 with 💰 a 💰 sense 💰 of 💰 pride 💰 and 💰 accomplishment 💰 for 💰 unlocking 💰 different 💰 heroes. 💰 As 💰 for 💰 cost, 💰 we 💰 selected 💰 initial 💰 values 💰 based 💰 upon 💰 data 💰 from 💰 the 💰 Open 💰 Beta 💰 and 💰 other 💰 adjustments 💰 made 💰 to 💰 milestone 💰 rewards 💰 before 💰 launch. 💰 Among 💰 other 💰 things, 💰 we're 💰 looking 💰 at 💰 average 💰 per-player 💰 credit 💰 earn 💰 rates 💰 on 💰 a 💰 daily 💰 basis, 💰 and 💰 we'll 💰 be 💰 making 💰 constant 💰 adjustments 💰 to 💰 ensure 💰 that 💰 players 💰 have 💰 challenges 💰 that 💰 are 💰 compelling, 💰 rewarding, 💰 and 💰 of 💰 course 💰 attainable 💰 via 💰 gameplay. We 💰 appreciate 💰 the 💰 candid 💰 feedback, 💰 and 💰 the 💰 passion 💰 the 💰 community 💰 has 💰 put 💰 forth 💰 around 💰 the 💰 current 💰 topics 💰 here 💰 on 💰 Reddit, 💰 our 💰 forums 💰 and 💰 across 💰 numerous 💰 social 💰 media 💰 outlets. Our 💰 team 💰 will 💰 continue 💰 to 💰 make 💰 changes 💰 and 💰 monitor 💰 community 💰 feedback 💰 and 💰 update 💰 everyone 💰 as 💰 soon 💰 and 💰 as 💰 often 💰 as 💰 we 💰 can. 💰
twitch chat
November 2017

2 wins 3 losses in promo placements PepeLaugh

twitchquotes: PepeLaugh 👉 ✅ ✅ ❌ ❌ ❌
twitch chat
February 2020

League of Legends

Goblin

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⠤⢶⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠛⢻⣷⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⠶⣏⣀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣀⣈⣿⡿⢷⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢠⠤⠤⠤⠠⠾⠷⠾⠿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⣛⣋⣉⣁⡀⢳⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⡀⢰⡆⢀⡤⠄⢰⡂⠉⠛⠁⢹⣿⠿⠛⢩⣥⣶⣿⠃⢸⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⡄ ⠄⠄⠄⣧⡄⡇⢸⠁⣶⣧⠄⣤⣿⣧⠈⠁⣶⣷⠄⢸⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⣼⡇ ⠄⠄⢶⣌⡁⠉⠘⠄⠈⢁⣔⠉⢹⣿⢆⢠⣬⣥⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣿⠟⣠⠶⢋⡽⠁ ⠄⠄⢠⠛⠃⣤⢾⣿⠃⣎⣹⣿⣿⣷⠿⢆⣿⠿⠿⠟⣛⡛⠿⣿⣼⠃⣶⡞⠃⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢠⣼⢱⠖⡀⡀⢿⣿⠿⠛⣁⣋⣭⠖⣌⠻⢿⣿⠟⡆⣹⣥⡏⣀⡄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢿⡈⢹⡎⣾⡇⠱⠈⡁⠄⣶⠉⣉⢁⢸⣿⡀⠈⠁⣆⣰⣿⠏⣰⣿⡇⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣓⠘⠃⢛⣠⣥⣤⣶⡶⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣴⠾⢋⣌⠻⠂⣉⣉⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⣴⡃⣿⡿⢡⣆⢉⣛⣩⣭⣤⣶⣶⣦⣬⣭⣥⣶⡶⠇⣿⡟⢰⣷⡌⣿⣷⡀⠄ ⢀⠻⡇⠛⢃⡟⣿⢰⣌⢙⠻⠿⢿⣿⡿⢻⠟⣁⠉⢡⡆⠋⠞⣸⠟⡁⠉⣿⣧⠄ ⠘⢧⡄⣤⣤⢠⡟⣸⣿⣿⣧⣀⣠⣜⣠⣤⣼⣿⡇⠸⢃⣼⡄⢃⣼⠃⣤⣿⣿⠄ ⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠛⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
November 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing