[Copypasta] Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Padoru

โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃ€โฃดโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃ„โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โข€โฃ€โฃ€โก€โ „โ „โ „โก โขฒโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโก€โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ ”โฃˆโฃ€โ „โข”โก’โ ณโกดโ Šโ „โ ธโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ ฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃงโ „โ „ โ „โขœโกดโข‘โ –โ Šโขโฃคโ žโฃฉโก‡โ „โ „โ „โ ™โขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃ†โ „โ โ ›โ ‹โ  โขธโ โฃทโ ˆโ „โฃฑโ ƒโ „โข โ ƒโ โก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ™โ ปโขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ ›โ ธโ „โ „โ „โ „ โ ˆโฃ…โ žโขโฃฟโขธโ ˜โก„โก†โ „โ „โ ˆโ ขโก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ‰โ ™โ ›โ ›โ ›โ ‰โ ‰โก€โ „โ กโข€โ „โฃ€ โ „โ ™โกŽโฃนโขธโ „โ †โข˜โ โ „โ „โ „โขธโ ˆโ ขโข„โก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ƒโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ ‘โขฟโ ˆโข†โ ˜โขผโ „โ „โ „โ „โ ธโขโขพโ „โก˜โกโ ฒโ †โ  โฃคโขคโขคโกคโ „โฃ–โก‡โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โฃดโฃถโฃฟโฃฟโฃฃโฃˆโฃขโฃธโ „โ „โ „โ „โกพโฃทโฃพโฃฎโฃคโกโ โ ˜โ Šโข โฃทโฃพโก›โกŸโ ˆโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ ‰โ ’โขฝโ „โ „โ „โ „โก‡โฃฟโฃŸโฃฟโก‡โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโฃปโกฟโก‡โก‡โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ ปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃ„โ ฐโขผโ „โ „โ „โก„โ โขปโฃโฃฏโ ƒโ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˆโขฟโฃปโ ƒโ ˆโก†โก„โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ ™โ ฟโ ฟโ ›โฃฟโฃถโฃคโก‡โ „โ „โขฃโ „โ „โ ˆโ „โข โ ‚โ „โ โ „โก€โ „โ „โฃ€โ ”โขโ ƒโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃพโ ขโฃ–โฃถโฃฆโฃคโฃคโฃฌโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃดโฃถโฃถโกโ  โขƒโ Œโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ฟโ ฟโ Ÿโ ›โกนโ ‰โ ›โ ›โ ฟโ ฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ ‚โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ  โ คโ คโ „โ „โฃ€โ „โ „โ „โ ‘โ  โฃคโฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โก˜โฃฟโ ฟโ ™โ ปโกโข€โกˆโ ‚โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ‘โ  โฃ โฃดโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃ‡โ ‰โ „โ ปโฃฟโฃทโฃ„โก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „
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