Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Hello my fellow Trump subs
twitchquotes:
Hello my fellow Trump subs. Alone we are not much but together we are strong. You cannot touch us Forsen Boys, no matter if you tuck us. So trump subs, copy and paste this message so we can defeat the Forsen Boys.
twitch chat
Trump
I have to print out chat in order to read it
twitchquotes:
Hey guys, my monitor isn't working. I have to print out chat in order to read it. The paper and ink are really expensive, so please don't spam! Thank you.
twitch chat
Classic
Having a son might be more cucked than a daughter
Atleast by having a daughter you can guarantee your bloodline. Plus its a fact that daughters are more biologically inclined to love and respect their fathers. Those whores you see on the internet all suffer from daddy issues aka absent father. A daughter with a present father usually turns out ok.
I say its more cucked because biologically mothers are closest to their sons. Now imagine this. You and your wife are older and she thinks you can't satisfy her anymore, then she views pretty much a younger healthier version of you in their son. Now imagine being cucked by your own son, that shit has to be insanely brutal. Atleast wiith your daughter you can get some action, but with your son you cant plus you risk being cucked. Daughters in their younger years always prefer being around their dads. Which is why i say daughter>son. Plus daughters are usually more agreeable with their fathers unlike sons who want to bash heads to show who is the alpha in the household.
NSFW
The Moon isn't so great?
twitchquotes:
The Moon isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw an astronomical object with such an ability and movement within the celestial plane? The Moon puts the eclipse game to another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a planet with its skill and passion for moving in front of things again. The Sun breaks records. Earth breaks records. The Moon breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.
twitch chat
MY GREETINGS ResidentSleeper
twitchquotes:
MY GREETINGS 
SHAPESHIFT SHAPESHIFT THE CIRCLE OF LIFE IS OVER PLAGUE LORD MY WINGED CHILDREN FILL THE SKIES I AM THE ESSENCE OF MAGIC
SHAPESHIFT SHAPESHIFT THE CIRCLE OF LIFE IS OVER PLAGUE LORD MY WINGED CHILDREN FILL THE SKIES I AM THE ESSENCE OF MAGIC
twitch chat
Kripp