twitchquotes:
Imagine going to an online chat and spamming it with brainless text for no reason.
twitch chat
I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas
Le fedora has arrived
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
βββββββββββleββfedoraβββββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
ββββββββββhasββββarrivedββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
Classic
I am not receiving 328.2 million votes on my election
twitchquotes:
I have noticed that, although America has 328.2 million people, I am not receiving 328.2 million votes on my election. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to vote for me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to vote for me. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
twitch chat
2020 US Election
Classic
How do I get my husband to stop going βGoblin Modeβ during sex?
How do I get my husband to stop going βGoblin Modeβ during sex?
TLDR; My husband says βGoblin Mode activatedβ when we start to have sex, growls and acts like a caveman, and then says βGoblin Mode offβ when we stop, and then pretends not to remember afterward.
I really love my husband and heβs always been great in bed. But recently heβs been acting really weird. So, a couple of days ago, my son went on a rampage through our house and said he was in βGoblin Modeβ. We didnβt really know what to do with him, so we sent him to live with my parents so he can go to a special needs school. My husband a really great relationship with our son and loved him more than anything. Naturally, he was upset when he had to leave. Heβs an incredibly tough man, but this was the first time Iβve ever seen him cry. I think since then, heβs been a little emotionally unwell. Iβve heard him muttering, βGoblinβ repeatedly when he didnβt notice me, staring blankly into his food, and just going alone by himself to do who knows what. I feel awful for him, but we both agreed that this was for the best. Last night, the day after our son went away, we decided to have sex to relieve our stress. However, my husband said βGoblin Mode activatedβ, starting growling, and went wild having sex with me. Admittedly, it was some of the best and most experimental sex Iβve ever had, but Iβm worried that something might be going on with my husband. Any advice?
Edit: The problem isnβt the βGoblin Modeβ, itβs that he could be ill
Confessions
Classic
Born to be a Twitch channel mod
twitchquotes:
You can say that I was born to be a Twitch channel mod. I catch a glimpse of copypasta, the adrenaline starts pumping. A whiff of drama, I snap into duty. My streamer calls for a chat ban, I erase that motherfucker from the history books of this channel. There is no !command I wonβt code, no timeout I wonβt give, no Twitch laws I wonβt overlook, and no order I wonβt obey to make my streamer happy. And if you become his problem, well, Iβm sorry to say that Iβll become yours.
twitch chat
MODS
Classic
Hi Kripp, sleazy video game developer here
twitchquotes:
Hi Kripp, sleazy video game developer here. I understand you are willing to sell yourself out like a cheap Romanian hooker to any two-bit game development outfit as long as they dangle some shekels in front of your beady little eyes? Great! Because I have this brilliant game in beta testing right now called "Watching Paint Dry" and I am willing to pay you $5.00 USD to play it for 24 hours straight. Let me know what you think, you glorious sellout!
twitch chat
Kripp