[Copypasta] If Apple opens super green tomorrow

If Apple opens super green tomorrow, I will buy a green Apple and cut a 1/4in hole in it and fuck it with my peen.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/kj17ga/what_are_your_moves_tomorrow_december_24_2020/gguwkak
I used to be a real ad
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Wallstreetbet's Christmas break

Gonna be checking the market every chance I get while pretending to think my brother-in-law's Cards Against Humanity answers are funny.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

I challenge you to ā€œTurtle Kingā€

Before my ban, someone challenged me to a duel with cocks. I challenge you to ā€œTurtle Kingā€ instead. We each dock our unhardened cocks into each other, then we put on clips of Yellen speaking during FOMC meetings. The first to effectively go from flaccid to erect and push the other out of the ā€œdockā€ is crowned Turtle šŸ¤“. Dual me, Iā€™m 4-0.
October 2021

WallStreetBets

I just fired out why they call them Brokers

I just figured out why they call them ā€˜Brokersā€™
March 2021

WallStreetBets

The real power of compounding

Remember, if you lose 10% a day over several days youā€™re actually losing less money as time passes. This is what people mean when they talk about the power of compounding
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Robinhood halts trading on President's Day

This is bullshit. Iā€™m disgusted and Iā€™m honestly on the verge of having a mental fucking breakdown. Robinhood has once again halted trading. But this time itā€™s halted on all stocks. This fine Monday morning I wake up to find that all orders arenā€™t going to be filled till tomorrow morning. My dadā€™s wifeā€™s girlfriend is a powerful lawyer in Boca Raton and Iā€™m seriously considering retaining her services and filing a class action lawsuit against these citadel dick munchers. This has happened to me too many times. Iā€™m low key spiraling into madness. Donate to me on onlyfans if you want to contribute towards the legal fees. Sheā€™s giving me a pretty kickass discount, but she estimates itā€™s still going to cost $150k. This happens to be the amount I lost on gme, but this is not relevant to the conversation here. Itā€™s time to rise up and take down robinhood once and for all. Also, yeah my stepmom has a girlfriend. Itā€™s 2021 you bigots.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

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