Ok, this is ABSOLUTE fucking bullshit. I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday, and when Lightning McQueen got HOT with Sally in Radiator Springs, my boner engaged. When Lightning McQueen said "Ka-Chow!", I couldn't help it!!! I closed my eyes, and I TORE my dick to shreds, using whip like motions and pulled with great force. That was one of the best nuts I ever had, just thinking about it now gets me riled up. Thing is, I nutted all over the kid sitting right next to me, and his mom got all pissed at me, screaming at me for jacking off on her son. I told that bitch to shut the fuck up, and that jacking off is a natural, artistic, and beautiful process. You should BE HAPPY that my semen is all over your son, maybe he can learn a lesson or two about the culture and art of jacking off. HOWEVER, the movie theater managers didn't agree with me. They KICKED ME OUT of the movie theater, and I didn't even finish watching the Cars movie. Not only THAT, but they made me clean up my semen after it already dried out and solidified on the seats. THATS TORTURE!! Do you know how hard it is to clean semen after its dried out? You CLEAN semen after its FRESH out of your cock, not an hour after you fucking nutted. This is a fucking OUTRAGE. Do you really expect me to not whip out my cock and jack off when i see a HOT sex scene in a movie? Either don't ban sex scenes in movies, or LET ME jack off in your theater, assholes.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Dunning-Kruger effect
twitchquotes:
The Dunning–Kruger effect is a cognitive bias wherein unskilled individuals suffer from illusory superiority, mistakenly assessing their ability to be much higher than is accurate. This bias is attributed to a metacognitive inability of the unskilled to recognize their ineptitude.
twitch chat
Kripp
There is no "random number generator" in any games
twitchquotes:
I have a REQUEST: could you please stop saying "RNG"? There is no "random number generator" in any games. It's all PSEUDO-random number generator. So therefore it should be PNG or PRNG and not RNG. I am a mathematician, this is important to me, thank you. Using incorrect terms make you lose unprofessional and amateurish and make you lose credibility
twitch chat
OJ warriors
twitchquotes:
Wᴇ ᴀʀᴇ ɪɴ ᴀ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ᴏғ ɢʀᴇᴀᴛ ᴅᴇᴘᴇʀᴇssɪᴏɴ ᴍʏ ғʀɪᴇɴᴅs. Kʀɪᴘᴘ ɪs ᴛᴇsᴛɪɴɢ ᴏᴜʀ ғᴀɪᴛʜ ʙʏ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ ʙᴀᴅ ᴄᴀsᴜᴀʟ ɢᴀᴍᴇs ᴀs ᴀ ᴅɪʀᴇᴄᴛ ʀᴇsᴜʟᴛ ᴏғ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴜɴʜᴏʟʏ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴs ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴀɴ ᴇᴠɪʟ ᴡɪᴛᴄʜ. Iᴛ ɪs ᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴇsᴛɪɴʏ ᴀs OJ ᴡᴀʀʀɪᴏʀs ᴛᴏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀᴘᴜᴄɪɴᴏ ᴜɴᴛɪʟ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ɴᴏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʟᴇғᴛ ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ sᴀʟᴠᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴡᴇ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴀɴᴅ ᴅᴇsᴇʀᴠᴇ
twitch chat
Kripp
How can these trash players be considered pros
twitchquotes:
How can these trash players be considered pros when they are always falling off the map?? Even I in Silver can at least not just walk of the map lol...
twitch chat
OverwatchLeague
Overwatch
Gotta love making jokes with my friends bro
I was driving with a friend
I grab his leg instead of the gearstick
We both laugh and I unzip his pants
I park the car while fondling with his balls, my friend is laughing because he knows it's a joke and we're just friends
I start sucking his dick and was about to choke on it because I'm laughing so hard
My friend is also laughing his ass off, he starts making train noise while yelling "BROJOB BROJOB CHOO CHOO"
He then cums and then I swallow it all and kiss him while both laughing cuz we know it's a joke.
Gotta love making jokes with my friends bro.