[Copypasta] I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday

Ok, this is ABSOLUTE fucking bullshit. I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday, and when Lightning McQueen got HOT with Sally in Radiator Springs, my boner engaged. When Lightning McQueen said "Ka-Chow!", I couldn't help it!!! I closed my eyes, and I TORE my dick to shreds, using whip like motions and pulled with great force. That was one of the best nuts I ever had, just thinking about it now gets me riled up. Thing is, I nutted all over the kid sitting right next to me, and his mom got all pissed at me, screaming at me for jacking off on her son. I told that bitch to shut the fuck up, and that jacking off is a natural, artistic, and beautiful process. You should BE HAPPY that my semen is all over your son, maybe he can learn a lesson or two about the culture and art of jacking off. HOWEVER, the movie theater managers didn't agree with me. They KICKED ME OUT of the movie theater, and I didn't even finish watching the Cars movie. Not only THAT, but they made me clean up my semen after it already dried out and solidified on the seats. THATS TORTURE!! Do you know how hard it is to clean semen after its dried out? You CLEAN semen after its FRESH out of your cock, not an hour after you fucking nutted. This is a fucking OUTRAGE. Do you really expect me to not whip out my cock and jack off when i see a HOT sex scene in a movie? Either don't ban sex scenes in movies, or LET ME jack off in your theater, assholes.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
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i play fortnite everyday, all day

twitchquotes: i play fortnite everyday, all day. without it, i wouldnโ€™t be who i am today. fortnite is by far the best game ever in existence. if you donโ€™t play it, then your obviously some broke, stupid piece of shit who doesnโ€™t have a life. i am level 100 and have bought all the skins available at the moment. stop making fun of fortnite you assholes. i bet that you donโ€™t even have a good skin or pickaxe you sad little cunt. you need to step your game the fuck up or else ill block you on every social media app my parents will allow me to have.
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November 2018

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IS THAT A MOTHERFUCKING ***SQUID GAME REFERENCE***??????!!!!!!!!!!11!1!1!1!1!1!1! ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ

๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ HOLY FUCKING SHITโ€ผ๏ธโ€ผ๏ธโ€ผ๏ธโ€ผ๏ธ IS THAT A MOTHERFUCKING SQUID GAME REFERENCE??????!!!!!!!!!!11!1!1!1!1!1!1! ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ SQUID GAME IS THE BEST FUCKING SHOW ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ’ฏ GI-HUN IS SO HOTTTTT ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿฅต๐Ÿฅต๐Ÿฅต๐Ÿฅต๐Ÿฅต COME PLAY DDJAKI WITH ME ๐ŸŸฅ๐ŸŸฆ๐ŸŸฅ๐ŸŸฆ๐ŸŸฅ๐ŸŸฆ๐ŸŸฅ๐ŸŸฆ๐ŸŸฅ๐ŸŸฆ๐ŸŸฅ๐ŸŸฆ YOU CAN PAY WITH YOUR BODY ๐Ÿ–๐Ÿ˜Ÿ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿ˜Ÿ๐Ÿ–๐Ÿ˜Ÿ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿ˜Ÿ๐Ÿ–๐Ÿ˜Ÿ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿ˜Ÿ MUGUNGHWA KKOCI PIEOT SEUMNIDA ๐Ÿ”ซ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ”ซ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ”ซ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ”ซ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ”ซ๐Ÿ˜  Whatโ€™s the gameโ“ Whatโ€™s the game!โ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game!โ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game! Whatโ€™s the game!โ“ Whatโ€™s the game! โ“ Whatโ€™s the game!โ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game! โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game!Whatโ€™s the game!Whatโ€™s the game! Whatโ€™s the game!Whatโ€™s the game!Whatโ€™s the game Whatโ€™s the game!โ“ Whatโ€™s the game! โ“ Whatโ€™s the game!Whatโ€™s the gameโ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game! โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game! โ“ Whatโ€™s the game! โ“ Whatโ€™s the game!โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game! โ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game!โ“ Whatโ€™s the game! โ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game!โ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game! โ“ Whatโ€™s the game!Whatโ€™s the game! โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game!โ“ โ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game!โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ Whatโ€™s the game! โ“ Whatโ€™s the game! Whatโ€™s the game!Whatโ€™s the game!Whatโ€™s the game! Whatโ€™s the game! โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ Oh no you failed the game!๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€ Player 69420 eliminated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ r/squidgamememes r/unexpectedsquidgame r/expectedsquidgame perfectly balanced as all things should be r/unexpectedthanos r/expectedthanos for balance ๐Ÿฆ‘๐ŸŽฎ๐Ÿฆ‘๐ŸŽฎ๐Ÿฆ‘๐ŸŽฎ๐Ÿฆ‘๐ŸŽฎ โบ๐Ÿ”ผโนโบ๐Ÿ”ผโนโบ๐Ÿ”ผโน ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
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