[Copypasta] Type :) if you have crippling depression

twitchquotes: type :) if you have Crippling Depression :)
twitch chat
September 2018
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

hey xqc are you lying about my mom?

twitchquotes: hey xqc are you lying about fucking my mom? if so my dad will beat you up, hes a retired navy seal. I have never seen you in my house which is quite odd, but if i saw you i would beat you up on god.
twitch chat
June 2020
xQcOW

Lord Microsoft

10:43 PM, Microsoft Tower, Washington. A figure stands in shadow, red lights from the theistic ceiling flood the spacious hall. Along the sides, hallmark pieces of technology are proudly displayed on golden pedestals. The Xbox, Windows, Hololens; At the center of it all, the vaccine. "Microsoft Microbe Covid-19" the label on the syringe reads. A glowing substance can be seen sitting still inside. Monitors flicker to life at the end of the hall, each one showing the point of view of an innocent civilian. The light draws a silhouette of a man. His body, frail. His skin is leathery and rugged. Breathing apparatus cover his face, a cold green mist slowly spewing out. The grand door opens, humanoids armed with weapons drag an unkempt and furious man towards the being in shadow. They throw him to the floor, spit slathering the ground. "This is the last one?" the figure asks. "Yes, Lord Microsoft. all 4,607,423,673 other citizens have been accounted for." The rugged man looks upwards, his face bloodied and bruised. His eyes meet Lord Microsoft's. Puffed from tears, his eyes can only show one emotion: anger. "Bill Gates, you piece of shit. I swore to Samantha that if I ever-" "Silence, creature!" Lord Microsoft slaps him with the back of his hand. "I am lord Microsoft, and you will refer to me as such!" The guards grab the man, hoisting him up. "Now, let us delay no further. It has taken me years to get to this point, and I will not have my victory denied!" Lord Microsoft grabs the vaccine and primes it for injection. "Such a small thing, isn't it? Yet, it has afforded me the right to dominate all life on Earth. Covid was a blessing, not a curse." The man's eyes widened, he screams in retaliation, but the guards shut his mouth with force. Lord Microsoft pierces his flesh with the needle. A flourescent orange liquid can be seen coursing through his veins. He falls to the floor, his muscles tightening and constricting in unnatural fashion. His eyes bulge from his skull and he shouts in pain. He slumps over, and in only a moment he comes back to his feet. His pupils dilated and his skin, pale. "How may I serve you, my lord."
August 2021

COVID

Coronavirus

I hate April Fool's Day

I’m fucking shaking and crying right now y’all, and people aren’t taking me seriously. This is a DUMB FUCKING HOLIDAY, where people say shit that ISN’T FUCKING REAL for NO REASON. I’ve cut off 8 family members already for falling for this shriveled up, half-assed ANNUAL CORPORATE FIG LEAF like the NPC SHEEP THEY ARE. Maybe if they listened to REAL COMEDY like Bill Maher or political satire that validates what I already believe in, they’d be WORTHY OF INTERACTING WITH. BUT NO, I have to scroll through my timeline, seething, wailing and gnashing my teeth as I’m BOMBARDED BY LOW EFFORT CORNY CAPITALIST PROPOGANDA. THIS IS A SERIOUS DAY. I’m allowed to be this pressed about ha-ha corny joke day because IT’S SERIOUS FOR ME AND THEREFORE SHOULD BE FOR EVERYONE. My great uncle was tragically flattened while trying to rob a coca-cola vending machine on this date, and PEOPLE ARE STILL MAKING CORNU FUKUNG JOKES. I’ve had enough
April 2021

forsenSleeper

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⣠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣠⡾⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣼⣿⣶⣿⣿⣦⣤⣀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣼⣿⡿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠉⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣤⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⢣⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣻⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠛⣿⣿⠃ ⣿⣿⢋⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠻⢿⣿⣿⣷⠄⣸⣿⠄ ⣿⣿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣤⣿⡟⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢶⡿⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⣍⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠁⠄⠄ ⡏⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣁⡹⠿⣿⣤⣙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠘ ⡇⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀ ⣿⠄⠄⠉⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡝⠻⣿⢛⡛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣆⠑⢎⠄⢀⡃⣼
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

This Disney DVD is enhanced with Disney's FastPlay

twitchquotes: 𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝘿𝙞𝙨𝙣𝙚𝙮 𝘿𝙑𝘿 𝙞𝙨 𝙚𝙣𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚𝙙 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝘿𝙞𝙨𝙣𝙚𝙮’𝙨 𝙁𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮. 𝙔𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙞𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙖 𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙤𝙛 𝙗𝙤𝙣𝙪𝙨 𝙛𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙚𝙨 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚𝙜𝙞𝙣 𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙘𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮. 𝙏𝙤 𝙗𝙮𝙥𝙖𝙨𝙨 𝙁𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮, 𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙚𝙘𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙈𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙈𝙚𝙣𝙪 𝙗𝙪𝙩𝙩𝙤𝙣 𝙖𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙮 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚. 𝙁𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚𝙜𝙞𝙣 𝙞𝙣 𝙖 𝙢𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩…
twitch chat
May 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing