[Copypasta] My best friend is racist

So I met him today and asked him: "Hello, my best friend, are you racist?" And he replied with: "Yes, I'm racist" I was shocked. So I asked him back: "You racist?" He said: "Yes, I'm actually racist" To comprehend him, I asked: "Why are you racist?" He answered with: "Because I'm racist" I made sure: "Racism?" He replied: "Yeah, racism" I shout out: "Oh no" He just: "Yeah" And I'm just: "That's so racist" He: "Racism"
October 2021
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November 2014
Reynad

In Korea, heart surgeon

Number one. Steady hand. One day, Kim Jong Un need new heart. I do operation. But mistake! Kim Jong Un die! SSD very mad! I hide fishing boat, come to America. No English, no food, no money. Darryl give me job. Now I have house, American car and new woman. Darryl save life. My big secret. I kill Kim Jong Un on purpose. I good surgeon. The best!
April 2021

Classic

Wife attack AITA?

I (46M) was having lunch (lasagna) with my side chick (42F) on a lovely day (23°C) when all of a sudden my wife (44F) of 35 years barges in and starts attacking me (46M). Wtf (what the fuck) was she thinking I had been having sex with my side chick (42F) every other weekend it's not like I was doing this every day. She (44F) then starts attacking her (42F) and the wait staff (32M, 26M and 29M) have to intervene. Completely ruined my lunch. AITA?
December 2019

Am I The Asshole?

Kirby

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣴⣶⣀⣀⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⣔⠮⠍⠛⠒⠒⠒⠚⠠⠽⣉⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡂⠕⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠢⢀⡹⠛⠋⠑⡄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣀⣀⣠⣼⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠜⠑⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⢸⠉⢆⠀⠀⢸⣀⣸⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⡏⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠸⣄⣸⡆⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⠀⣠⣴⣶⣶⡄⠀⢀⣤⣾⣇⣀⣀⡀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⠀⠀⠈⠻⡿⠀⠘⠛⠛⠋⠁⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣷⢀⣀⠀⠻⠿⢀⣴⣶⣶⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣦⣤⠛⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡈⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃ ⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢦⣄⣀⡀⠤⣤⣤⣀⣀⣬⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣭⣷⣶⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠋⠁⠉⠛⠛⠿⠋⠁
December 2019

F*ck this guy, f*ck you too

twitchquotes: ↓ ᶠᵘᶜᵏ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᵍᵘʸ↓ ↑ ᶠᵘᶜᵏ ʸᵒᵘ ᵗᵒᵒ ↑
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August 2015
Reynad
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