[Copypasta] So that was a bruh moment

twitchquotes: She said she was “pregnant,” but I wasn’t buying that. I knew she had gas, and a lot of it. I knew that, if properly coaxed out, she had to potential for the greatest fart *EVER*. So one night I walked into her room and slowly approached her belly, and with my entire weight, I performed the greatest pile driver I have ever done. But instead of the thunderous sound expected, I heard a squish sound. Turns out she was pregnant. So that was a bruh moment.
twitch chat
November 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
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Patrick Star

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ascii art
July 2015

Anime girl stare

⠄⣾⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⠈⣿⡇⢹⣿⣿⣿⡇⡇⢸⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿ ⢠⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⡀⣿⣧⢸⣿⣿⣿⠁⡇⢸⣿⣿⠁⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⡇⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠈⢿⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿⡀⣿⣿⡿⠸⡇⣸⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⡿⠷⠄⠿⠿⠿⠟⠓⠰⠘⠿⣿⣿⡈⣿⡇⢹⡟⠰⠦⠁⠈⠉⠋⠄⠻⢿⣿ ⢨⡑⠶⡏⠛⠐⠋⠓⠲⠶⣭⣤⣴⣦⣭⣥⣮⣾⣬⣴⡮⠝⠒⠂⠂⠘⠉⠿⠖⣬ ⠈⠉⠄⡀⠄⣀⣀⣀⣀⠈⢛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠁⣀⣤⣤⣠⡀⠄⡀⠈⠁ ⠄⠠⣾⡀⣾⣿⣧⣼⣿⡿⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣼⣿⣧⣼⣿⣿⢀⣿⡇⠄ ⡀⠄⠻⣷⡘⢿⣿⣿⡿⢣⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣜⢿⣿⣿⡿⢃⣾⠟⢁⠈ ⢃⢻⣶⣬⣿⣶⣬⣥⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣾⣿⣷⣾⣾⢣ ⡄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠘ ⣿⡐⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢠⢃ ⣿⣷⡀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⢀⠆⣼ ⣿⣿⣷⡀⠄⠈⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠠⠂⢀⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢵⢠⣈⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢋⡁⢰⠏⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿ ⢻⣿⣿⣿⡄⢢⠨⠄⣯⠄⠄⣌⣉⠛⠻⠟⠛⢋⣉⣤⠄⢸⡇⣨⣤⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
April 2021

Weebs

Don't ever smoke

twitchquotes: My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your stream gave me cancer anyway.
twitch chat
January 2020

Classic

Lucina is a deep, complex, and intricate

twitchquotes: Lucina is one of the most deep, complex, and intricate characters in fighting game history and Zackray is an absolute hero for gracing us with his iteration of her
twitch chat
April 2019

Super Smash Bros

My boss recently discovered Among Us

Oh my fucking god guys I am fucking fuming. So the other day at work my boss told us that he recently discovered the video game Among Us, and ever since, his behaviour has become rather concerning. He now refers to me and my coworkers as 'crewmates'. Last Wednesday, when he noticed my teenage colleague slacking off at his workstation, he yelled at him saying he was "faking his tasks" and is "acting sus". I confronted my boss telling him that his behaviour lately has been egregious and immature, and he proceeded to call me an idiot and yelled "kicked!" The next day I caught him dancing around in his office blasting "among drip" from his desktop at full volume. I entered his office to kindly ask him to turn off the music since it was distracting to me and my coworkers. He looked at me angrily, telling me he has called an "emergency meeting", instructing me to have a seat. I asked him what was the matter and he told me that I have been acting extremely "sus". He repeatedly yelled "you're the impostor", telling me to say goodbye to my job because I have been "ejected". I fucking lost my job and I don't know what to do. Please help me Reddit! I have nowhere else to turn.
March 2021

Among Us / Amogus

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