[Copypasta] So that was a bruh moment

twitchquotes: She said she was “pregnant,” but I wasn’t buying that. I knew she had gas, and a lot of it. I knew that, if properly coaxed out, she had to potential for the greatest fart *EVER*. So one night I walked into her room and slowly approached her belly, and with my entire weight, I performed the greatest pile driver I have ever done. But instead of the thunderous sound expected, I heard a squish sound. Turns out she was pregnant. So that was a bruh moment.
twitch chat
November 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Coke Gaming ad script

twitchquotes: Oh my god, what the hell? what's going on? What, oh my god. Coke, are you serious right now? COKE GAMING WHAT! You are invited to the Twitch Partner Program! HI, I Just got partnered. We got partnered boys. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! What! Coke Gaming, what Is this? 10,000 bits? Coke Gaming, thank you so much for the 10,000 bits! Thanks. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you Coke.
twitch chat
December 2019

Chibi LeBlanc

⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⢿⣿⢿⣿⢿⣿⢿⣿⢿⣿⢿⣿⢿⣿⠿⠿⢿⡿⣿⡿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢾⣟⣯⣿⢯⣿⢯⣿⢯⡿⠯⠛⠋⠉⠠⠄⠠⠈⢀⠠⢹⣟⣿⡽⣟⢿⢾⢿⡿⣿⢿⣿⢿⣿⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⣿⣽⢿⡾⣟⣯⡿⠫⠉⡀⠂⠐⠈⡀⠂⡈⠠⠈⢀⠄⡈⢿⡷⡯⡺⡪⡽⣕⢟⢮⢯⡺⣕⢯⡳⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⣷⣟⣿⣻⢿⠉⠡⠐⠄⠄⢈⠄⡁⠠⠄⠄⠐⠈⠄⠄⢀⠸⣿⢯⢝⢮⢳⢝⡽⣕⢷⢝⡮⣳⢝⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⣷⢿⣽⣯⣿⡇⢁⠄⡁⠐⠄⠄⠠⠐⠄⠂⢁⠈⡀⠂⠠⠄⠹⣗⡝⣎⢯⡳⣝⢮⡳⣝⣞⢵⢯⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣽⣟⣷⢿⣞⣷⡀⠄⠠⠈⡀⠂⠐⢀⠁⡈⠄⠄⡀⠂⡁⠄⠠⠓⣝⢎⣗⢽⡪⣗⡽⣺⡪⡯⡺⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⢿⣽⡾⣟⣯⡿⣇⠄⢂⠠⠄⡈⠄⠄⡂⠄⡁⢂⠐⠠⠐⠄⡂⠠⠱⠣⠳⠝⠮⠳⠝⠞⡮⣫⢯⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⣿⣳⣿⣟⣯⣿⢿⡄⠂⠠⠁⠠⠈⡀⢂⠁⢂⠠⡈⠠⠈⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡠⣜⡵⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡽⣟⣾⣯⢿⡾⣟⣷⠄⡁⢈⠄⢡⢰⡰⣢⣳⠄⡯⡃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⣠⢤⣖⢾⡹⣝⢞⢮⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⢿⣟⣷⡟⠟⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢗⣗⢽⣕⢗⠄⡼⢝⠄⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⢯⡳⣕⢯⡺⣕⢯⡳⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⡿⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠄⣁⣓⢽⢵⣳⠏⣕⣒⠒⡆⠄⠄⡁⠄⠐⠄⢸⢮⡳⣝⣞⢽⢕⡯⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⣷⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⢿⡇⠄⠂⣻⢊⢰⢾⣻⣽⣿⣳⢰⢲⡃⠠⠄⠄⠄⢀⠈⠄⠄⠉⠌⠨⣁⡻⣪⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣳⡿⣾⢷⣿⡚⢁⠄⠄⣸⢽⢽⣾⣻⣯⣷⢿⣾⣽⣽⠁⠄⢀⠄⠂⠄⢀⠄⠈⡤⣳⢽⢕⡯⡳⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣯⣿⣻⣽⡿⣾⣻⣷⡄⠄⠘⢿⣻⣾⢾⡷⣾⢿⡷⣿⢾⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⢌⢯⡺⣕⢯⡺⣝⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⣞⣯⣷⣿⣻⣽⣾⢀⡆⠄⠄⠈⠙⠋⠛⠛⣋⣍⠁⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⢀⠐⣜⣗⢽⣕⢯⣺⢳⣝⢮⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣻⣟⣖⣭⣝⠷⠯⣾⡿⣦⣀⠃⢀⣀⠶⣿⡽⠿⠆⠂⠄⡀⣾⡰⣝⢜⢮⢮⡳⣕⢯⢮⡳⡳⣝⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣯⣿⣽⢷⣾⡃⢀⡄⠉⠙⠋⠄⢄⣻⣿⡗⢰⣾⣿⣷⠄⡁⠄⣿⡯⣪⡫⣺⢕⡯⣺⢝⡵⣫⢯⢮⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⣞⣯⡿⣷⢿⣟⣿⢷⣾⣄⣷⢿⠁⣯⢇⣿⣷⣿⠇⢀⢀⠂⠸⣯⣪⢺⡪⣗⡽⡮⣳⢽⡪⣗⢗⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣻⣯⣿⣻⢿⣽⣯⡿⣷⣻⣽⠏⢀⣿⢸⣿⣿⣯⠄⡠⣸⡆⠠⠑⣕⢗⣝⢞⢮⡫⣞⢵⡫⣞⣝⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣯⡿⣾⢯⣿⣻⢷⣯⡿⣯⡿⠁⡈⠙⡿⠘⠿⠟⢛⣁⡠⠘⢿⣆⠄⠘⠵⣕⢯⡳⡽⡺⣕⡟⡮⡮⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣯⣿⣻⣯⣷⢿⣻⡷⣿⢯⡟⠄⢪⣴⣄⠠⣠⣾⡿⣟⣇⢠⠘⢿⣀⣡⣬⡺⣕⢯⡫⡯⡺⡮⡯⣺⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⣾⣻⣾⣻⣟⣯⣿⣻⣟⠃⣴⣾⢿⣻⣧⠪⣷⡿⢛⣩⣴⡶⡈⢷⣫⡳⡯⣳⢝⡮⡯⣫⢞⣝⢮⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣻⣽⡾⣯⣿⣽⡾⣯⡟⠄⠿⣾⢿⣟⡎⠂⠉⣶⢿⣻⡽⠋⡀⠄⢞⣜⢮⣳⡫⣞⣝⢮⢯⡺⡵⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣯⣿⣷⣿⣿⣾⣷⣿⣿⠇⠄⠠⠄⡙⠙⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⠋⠄⠄⠠⠄⠈⢮⣺⡪⣞⡵⡳⡽⡵⣝⣞⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠐⡀⠐⢨⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣦⣌⠄⢂⠄⠄⠄⠳⣝⢞⢮⢯⡳⣝⢮⢮⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠂⠠⠈⣿⣇⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣮⡀⠄⠡⣀⠄⠘⠹⡵⣳⢝⡮⡯⡺⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠂⣀⣿⣿⣆⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠂⣯⡫⣖⣖⢮⣳⣝⢮⣏⢯⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣶⣶⣶⡲⣖⡎⠄⣼⣻⡻⣻⣪⡻⡯⣟⢯⣟⢯⢯⠰⡱⣝⣞⣮⣟⣞⣞⣵⣳⣝⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣾⣵⣥⣜⣷⣕⣯⣳⣳⣽⣝⣞⣗⣽⣽⣝⣵⣯⣳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2021

League of Legends

All Cops Are Sus (ACAS)

Instead of saying ACAB(all cops are bastar*ds) we should start saying ACAS(all cops are sus). Think about it, it's less offensive and it only shows that we think that a cop might be sus(suspicious) of something but not necesseraly guilty of it. It's the same thing in the popular game amogus with thinking that all red players are impostors really. This might sound stupid but hear me out. Statistically, every player regardless of their color has the same chance of being the impostor, yet, there is this social stigma that only red players are impostors. However, players of Amugus have developed this great system that will help them show their suspicion on someone without saying that they are the impostor(in case that they actually aren't). They say that someone is 'sus' so nobody gets their feelings hurt. We can apply this knowledge to the real world, right? If everyone can be an impostor in amongsus, regardless of their color, so can anyone be a bastard in real world, regardless of their task(job as some low inteligence individuals might call it).
April 2021

Among Us / Amogus

My son is learning Twitch speak

twitchquotes: Kripp I need advice. My son watches a lot of you, and he doesn’t speak English but is learning from chat. He's starting using terms like "pog","jabaited", and "kappa,” but its gotten to the point where every sentence is Twitchspeak. At dinner my daughter was talking about how she got accepted to college, and my son said "pog you, easy clap". I told him to talk normally to his family, and he replied "Weird champ, normies omegaLOL." I blacklisted twitch and now my son is hysterical, what to do.
twitch chat
December 2019
Kripp

Kapp

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣢⣐⣤⣤⣀⣀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣯⣿⣼⡍⢂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣯⣭⣬⣽⣼⣿⣾⣿⣣⣾⣾⣶⣾⣦⣄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⡟⠛⠋⠉⠀⠀⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣷ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⢀⣀⣀⣈⣿⡿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⢿⣟⠋⠉⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠋⠉⠋⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⡀⠀⠀⣠⣤⣄⣀⣀⣾⡇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⡆⠙⠿⣿⡇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣈⣹⣿⣿⡿⠀⢠⣿⠃⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣉⣙⡉⠁⢠⣶⣿⠇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠹⠯⡶⢀⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠶⢶⣶⣶⣶⣶⡾⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
September 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing