[Copypasta] So that was a bruh moment

twitchquotes: She said she was “pregnant,” but I wasn’t buying that. I knew she had gas, and a lot of it. I knew that, if properly coaxed out, she had to potential for the greatest fart *EVER*. So one night I walked into her room and slowly approached her belly, and with my entire weight, I performed the greatest pile driver I have ever done. But instead of the thunderous sound expected, I heard a squish sound. Turns out she was pregnant. So that was a bruh moment.
twitch chat
November 2020
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

pepeSpit

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠰⢾⣶⣦⢀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⡀⢿⣿⡆⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣰⣶⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡾⠁⣀⠙⠸⣿⡇⡟⣋⣩⣴⣶⣶⣶⣍⢿⣷⣄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠈⠙⠻⢷⡄⠄⠄⢠⣝⡀⠤⣴⣧⣭⠄⡞⠛⠻⣭⣭⣭⡛⢿⢸⣿⣿⡆⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠑⠄⠄⠄⠙⠻⣿⣶⣶⣶⢸⠄⠒⠄⢸⣿⣿⣷⡌⡼⣿⣿⣧⠄ ⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣀⢠⣴⡾⢟⡻⢿⣿⣷⢄⣐⠶⠿⠿⠛⣛⣃⣴⣿⣿⡿⠄ ⣿⠿⠛⠉⠉⢉⣉⡉⢭⣥⣿⣧⡘⣿⣮⣻⣿⣶⣮⣭⣍⣋⣭⣭⣴⣿⣿⣟⣱⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⠟⠄⠘⣿⡿⢛⣣⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠘⠻⠋⠄⠄⠄⠘⢇⣛⣛⣛⣩⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢏⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣤⣶⣶⣝⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣬⣝⣛⡛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢟⣛⣩⣤⣄
ascii art
November 2021

Pepe

Blizzard changes Fiery War Axe

twitchquotes: The other option we considered for Fiery War Axe was to lower its attack to 2, but that change didn’t feel intuitive enough. Generally, changing the mana cost of a card is less disruptive, because you can always see the mana cost of cards in your hand. LUL
twitch chat
September 2017

Hearthstone

I declare with utter certainty that James is an ass

twitchquotes: ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ɢʜᴀsᴛʟʏ ᴇʏʀɪᴇ ɪ ᴄᴀɴ sᴇᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇɴᴅs ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ, ᴀɴᴅ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜɪs ᴠᴀɴᴛᴀɢᴇ ᴘᴏɪɴᴛ I ᴅᴇᴄʟᴀʀᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴜᴛᴛᴇʀ ᴄᴇʀᴛᴀɪɴᴛʏ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴊᴀᴍᴇs ɪs ᴀɴ ᴀss
twitch chat
February 2016
Dota Major

Dota 2

RIP Joe the Spider

I know this is really stupid but I’m sad about it. Yesterday I had a friend come over. I’m a girl who lives alone so I guess some “dude” stuff hasn’t been done around the house. Context: I have a spider named joe. He’s a dandy long leg. He’s been my friend in the bathroom for months and had recently made his way down to closer by me by the tub instead of on the ceiling. I like to think I gained his trust. Well my friend goes into the bathroom and comes out said “you’re welcome”. I’m super confused. So I ask “for what?” He says “I just killed a big ass spider for you”. I couldn’t even contain myself. I just yelled “YOU KILLED JOE?!” And started tearing up. I didn’t tell him to leave Joe alone it never occurred to me. JOE TRUSTED ME. Joe had been in my bathroom since he was super tiny and he grew to be such a big boy. My friend was distraught. He’s a Pisces, so he immediately felt my deep sorrow for Joe. He apologized and swore to never squish any more spiders at my house. I think Joe was biologically female because there is a baby Joe. Baby Joe is on my ceiling but idk if I can gain Baby Joe’s trust after they witnessed the murder of their parental figure. RIP Joe I miss you so much. Getting ready in the morning will never be the same.
May 2022

Gr8 b8 m8

twitchquotes: Gr8 b8, m8. I rel8, str8 appreci8, and congratul8. I r8 this b8 an 8/8. Plz no h8, I'm str8 ir8. Cre8 more, can't w8. We should convers8, I won't ber8, my number is 8888888, ask for N8. No calls l8 or out of st8. If on a d8, ask K8 to loc8. Even with a full pl8, I always have time to communic8 so don't hesit8, I hope you r8 8/8 .. m8.
twitch chat
October 2014

Classic

More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing