[Copypasta] So that was a bruh moment

twitchquotes: She said she was “pregnant,” but I wasn’t buying that. I knew she had gas, and a lot of it. I knew that, if properly coaxed out, she had to potential for the greatest fart *EVER*. So one night I walked into her room and slowly approached her belly, and with my entire weight, I performed the greatest pile driver I have ever done. But instead of the thunderous sound expected, I heard a squish sound. Turns out she was pregnant. So that was a bruh moment.
twitch chat
November 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Don't post another copypasta

twitchquotes: Hey😠stop🚨right there ✋ this is the police 👮 if you post another 📖 copy📠🍝 pasta again in this neighborhood 🏠🏠 I'm gonna have to 🔒arrest you🔒 no ticket today 👦 kiddo 📟this is just a warning ⚠ be careful next time🚧
twitch chat
June 2017

I'm epic gamer style

twitchquotes: Yeah I’m not surprised your girl wants to leave you for me. Not my fault I’m fucking epic gamer style. Why wouldn’t she wanna be with me lol I have a 3.2 kd in Fortnite, backseat game in Twitch chats, and I reddit hard as fuck. Sorry for being too dope
twitch chat
May 2019

Supreme

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⢹⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠙⠻⠋⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⠀⠀⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⠟⠀⢠⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠒⠶⠾⢿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⢰⣿⣿⣷⣶⣦⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠙⠻⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠛⠛⠛⠶⢶⣤⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⣾⣿⣷⡄⠀⢼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠉⠋⠁⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢷⣤⣀⣀⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠛⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣤⣀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠉⠙⠻⣀⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀⣷⡀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠈⢻⡇⠀⡿⠃⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠉⠉⠑⠒⠲⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⢺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠉⠉⠙⠋⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣤⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠉⠀⠀⠈⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⢀⣤⡄⠀⡀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀⣿⡄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⢹⡇⠀⠟⠁⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣸⡇⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
April 2020

Fuck minecraft

twitchquotes: Fuck minecraft. I've had it with this dumb, misleading game. Do you know how much time I've spent digging through my backyard, only to find worms and dog shit? And what the fuck is with those fucked up graphics? NEWS FLASH, the real world is not comprised of blocks but actually of hundreds of atoms, stupid Notch. In fortnite (battle royale game) trees fall down when you cut them, but it stupid minecraft they float in the sky,wtf (what the fuck), where's the immersion?
twitch chat
January 2019

Young pistachio becomes grand old cashew

twitchquotes: Let me tell you a story. I was once a young pistachio like you. But then I saw the light. I saw the kripp and let the kripp into my life. Now I am a grand old cashew with a pepperoni plantation to boot. Don't make the mistake I once did and deny the kripp. Kripp is love. Kripp is life. Praise the Kripp. Amen.
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing