[Copypasta] So that was a bruh moment

twitchquotes: She said she was “pregnant,” but I wasn’t buying that. I knew she had gas, and a lot of it. I knew that, if properly coaxed out, she had to potential for the greatest fart *EVER*. So one night I walked into her room and slowly approached her belly, and with my entire weight, I performed the greatest pile driver I have ever done. But instead of the thunderous sound expected, I heard a squish sound. Turns out she was pregnant. So that was a bruh moment.
twitch chat
November 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Rick Astley paradox

twitchquotes: If you ask Rick Astley for a DVD of the movie Up, he won’t give it to you because he’s never gonna give you Up. However, by not giving you Up like you asked for it, he’s letting you down. This is known as the Astley paradox.
twitch chat
June 2020

Classic

YOU’VE BEEN FREAKING HIT BY THE KAWAII TRUCK

YOU’VE BEEN FREAKING HIT BY THE |^^^^^^^^^^^^](ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ | KAWAII TRUCK | ‘|”“”;.., ___. |_…_…______===|= _|__|…, ] | ”(@ )’(@ )”“”“*|(@ )(@ )*****(@　　　　⊂（ﾟДﾟ⊂⌒） NO KAWAII TRUCK NO!!! MOTHERFUCKER ONCE YOU'VE BEEN HIT, YOU HAVE TO HIT EIGHT FUCKING KAWAII ASS PEOPLE! IF YOU GET HIT AGAIN YOU’LL KNOW YOU'RE REALLY SO FUCKING KAWAII IT'S SO FUCKING SUGOI PEOPLE WILL PISS THEIR PANTS AND SHIT BRICKS AND YOU WILL BE THE MOTHERFUCKING LORD OF THE MOTHERFUCKING KAWAII! IF YOU BREAK THIS MOTHERFUCKING CHAIN, YOU'LL BE CURSED WITH UNKAWAIINESS AND SHITTINESS FOR 9000 YEARS SO PASS IT; HIT WHO EVER YOU THINK IS KAWAII.
ascii art
October 2021

Weebs

Anime

Peeking Anime Girl

⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠟⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠈⠙⠾⣿⣾⣿⣾⣿⣾⣿⣾⣿ ⠋⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠔⠁⠀⠀⢀⠠⠐⠈⠁⠀⠀⠁⠀⠈⠻⢾⣿⣾⣿⣾⣟⣿ ⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠔⠃⠀⠀⠠⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠆⠀⠀⠄⠀⠙⣾⣷⣿⢿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⢰⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠀⠀⠈⡀⠀⠈⢿⣟⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⢀⡜⣐⠃⠀⠀⠀⣠⠁⡄⠰⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠀⠀⠀⠰⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿ ⠀⢠⠆⢠⡃⠀⠀⠀⣔⠆⡘⡇⢘⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿ ⢀⡆⠀⡼⢣⠀⢀⠌⢸⢠⠇⡇⢘⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿ ⣼⣃⠀⠁⢸⢀⠎⠀⢸⠎⠀⢸⢸⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠂⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿ ⠃⡏⠟⣷⣤⠁⠀⠀⠸⠀⠀⡾⢀⢇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠄⠸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠄⠀⠀⠀⣿ ⠀⠀⣀⣿⣿⣿⢦⠀⠀⠀⠀⡧⠋⠘⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⢸⠀⠀⠠⡘⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿ ⠈⠀⢿⢗⡻⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠱⡀⠀⠀⢰⠁⡇⠀⠀⢨⠃⡄⢀⠀⣸⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣱⠀⠀⡎⠸⠁⠀⢀⠞⡸⠀⡜⢠⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣺⣿⣧⢰⣧⡁⡄⠀⡞⠰⠁⡸⣠⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡿⠏⣿⠟⢁⠾⢛⣧⢼⠁⠀⠀⢰⣿⡿⣷⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠡⠄⠀⡠⣚⡷⠊⠀⠀⠀⣿⡿⣿⡿⣿ ⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠊⠁⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿ ⠱⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠊⠀⠀⠀⡞⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠙⢦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⠖⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣾⡿⣷⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⣩⡞⠉⠁⠀⢸⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿ ⡆⠀⠀⣀⡠⠞⠁⣧⢤⣀⣀⣀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣷⣿⣷⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⠊⠁⠀⠀⡰⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣹⠶⢦⡀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣷⣿⣷⣿ ⣿⢿⠀⠀⠀⡔⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⡄⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣾⣷⣿⣿ ⠋⠈⠀⢀⠜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠈⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣽⣾⣿ ⢀⡄⡠⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠁⠀⠀⠀⣸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣻⣿ ⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠀⠐⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣻⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣃⡇⠀⠲⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⡿⣿ ⣀⠤⠤⠤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢬⠞⡇⠀⠀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⡁⢀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⡼⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠁⠀⠇⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⠔⠃⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⡼⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡇⠀⠀⡃⠀⠀⠙⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣷⣿ ⠒⠊⠀⠀⢸⠀⣸⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡞⠀⠀⠀⢅⠀⠀⡂⠸⡄⠀⠀⠀⣿⣟⣿ ⠓⠀⠉⠀⢸⣰⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⡆⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⡇⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⠉⠁⠀⢠⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠁⡇⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⡇⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣷⣿ ⡀⠀⢀⢿⣥⡤⠤⠤⠤⣀⣀⢠⠇⠀⢸⠀⠀⢰⠁⠀⢨⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣟⣿
ascii art
December 2021

Weebs

Anime

A middle aged man complaining about an online children's card game

twitchquotes: Why does anyone watch this guys stream? Its just a middle aged man complaining about an online children's card game. Its not even interesting either? please.. dont copy and paste this. its serious..he has 20k + viewers almost constantly
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

How traders politely decline the second date

I discovered recently if I am on a date and I’m not that interested in a second, all I need to do is start talking about my stocks. They won’t ask for another one then, I won’t have to politely decline.
December 2021

WallStreetBets

More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing