[Copypasta] if you are a single girl and also a gamer

twitchquotes: if you are a single girl and also a gamer please send me a direct message so that I can get to know you :) no, this is not a joke or a "copypasta" I'm genuinely looking to find someone who shares my passions
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July 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
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I have to tell you guys something that is very important indeed

twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

KappaPride

Lord Microsoft

10:43 PM, Microsoft Tower, Washington. A figure stands in shadow, red lights from the theistic ceiling flood the spacious hall. Along the sides, hallmark pieces of technology are proudly displayed on golden pedestals. The Xbox, Windows, Hololens; At the center of it all, the vaccine. "Microsoft Microbe Covid-19" the label on the syringe reads. A glowing substance can be seen sitting still inside. Monitors flicker to life at the end of the hall, each one showing the point of view of an innocent civilian. The light draws a silhouette of a man. His body, frail. His skin is leathery and rugged. Breathing apparatus cover his face, a cold green mist slowly spewing out. The grand door opens, humanoids armed with weapons drag an unkempt and furious man towards the being in shadow. They throw him to the floor, spit slathering the ground. "This is the last one?" the figure asks. "Yes, Lord Microsoft. all 4,607,423,673 other citizens have been accounted for." The rugged man looks upwards, his face bloodied and bruised. His eyes meet Lord Microsoft's. Puffed from tears, his eyes can only show one emotion: anger. "Bill Gates, you piece of shit. I swore to Samantha that if I ever-" "Silence, creature!" Lord Microsoft slaps him with the back of his hand. "I am lord Microsoft, and you will refer to me as such!" The guards grab the man, hoisting him up. "Now, let us delay no further. It has taken me years to get to this point, and I will not have my victory denied!" Lord Microsoft grabs the vaccine and primes it for injection. "Such a small thing, isn't it? Yet, it has afforded me the right to dominate all life on Earth. Covid was a blessing, not a curse." The man's eyes widened, he screams in retaliation, but the guards shut his mouth with force. Lord Microsoft pierces his flesh with the needle. A flourescent orange liquid can be seen coursing through his veins. He falls to the floor, his muscles tightening and constricting in unnatural fashion. His eyes bulge from his skull and he shouts in pain. He slumps over, and in only a moment he comes back to his feet. His pupils dilated and his skin, pale. "How may I serve you, my lord."
August 2021

COVID

Coronavirus

FeelsStrongMan

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠉⠁⠈⠉⠙⠻⢿⡿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠙⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠠⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠑⠪⡖⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⠶⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⢔⡢⠍⠉⠉⠩⠭⢑⣤⣔⠲⠤⠭⠭⠤⠴⢊⡻⣿ ⡿⠁⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⣤⠭⠓⠊⣁⣤⠂⠠⢀⡈⠱⣶⣆⣠⣴⡖⠁⠂⣀⠈⢷⣮⣹ ⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⢳⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣿⡿⢿⣿⣇⣀⣥⣤⠤⢼⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡟⠑⠚⢹⡟⠉⣑⠒⢺⡇⡀⠀⡹⠀⠀⣀⣴⣽⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⣿⠒⠉⠀⠀⢠⠃⠈⠙⠻⣍⠙⢻⡻⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣘⡄⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠘⡇⠀⠀⠀⠘⡄⠀⢱⢸⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡀⠀⠾⣟⣻⣛⠷⣶⣼⣥⣀⣀⣀⠀⢧⠀⠀⠀⠠⣧⣀⣼⣴⢽⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠹⡙⠛⠷⣿⣭⣯⣭⣟⣛⣿⣿⣿⣛⣛⣿⣭⣭⣾⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡀⠀⠀⣇⠀⠉⠉⠉⡏⠉⠙⠛⠛⡿⣻⣯⣷⣿⣿⣿ ⣶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⡸⠁⣠⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⣷⣤⣄⣈⣆⣤⣤⣧⣶⣷⣿⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2020

Pepe

Priced in

Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
December 2020

Classic

WallStreetBets

IF YOU TOUCH THE BUG, PROGRAM HEARTHSTONE

twitchquotes: BUG TEST 🐛 IF YOU TOUCH THE BUG, PROGRAM HEARTHSTONE ⎝ Jebaited
twitch chat
June 2017

Hearthstone

Chat Test

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