[Copypasta] Does anyone else bite their Switch?

twitchquotes: Does anyone else bite their Switch? This is not a shitpost, I really do this. I don't like to rage when I'm playing online, so when something really annoying happens and I get pissed, I try not to yell or punch something. Instead, I keep a straight face and I angrily bite into my switch for a few seconds until my anger is released. The best part of this is that Nintendo seems to have built the Switch with this in mind, because the plastic material seems completely resistant to my teeth. Legit, there are never teeth marks even mere minutes after the initial chomp. What I'm wondering is, does anyone else here do the same? Am I the only munching smash player? I hope I've inspired someone to try the same, it's a super good way to take your anger out without damaging anything or making noise!
twitch chat
July 2020
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Come Down Kid (in Farsi)

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠋⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⢻⣿⠋⠉⠙⠻⠿⣿⠏⢻⣿ ⣿⡇⠸⠿⠏⠻⠿⠆⢸⣿⣿⡟⠰⠆⠘⠷⠴⠖⠂⠀⠴⠿⠇⢸⣿ ⣿⣧⣀⣀⣠⣄⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣷⣤⣶⣀⣀⣀⣤⣼⣄⣀⣀⣀⣼⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣟⣛⣙⣿⣙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣩⣹⣿⣿⣋⣻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⣿⡇⠀⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣴⣿⡟⢿⣿⠛⣿⣧⠀⣿⡇⠀⣿⣅⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⢹⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠙⠛⠛⠁⣸⡟⠿⠿⡿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⠟⡟⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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December 2021

I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today

I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today, I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine signaling my impending, earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen EVERYONE in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever had, or ever will produce shot out SO HARD that my dick was ripped apart by my Übernut, accelerating to 5% of the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, it barely slowed before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear powered angle grinder. the sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of illinois became pregnant with my children.
July 2021

Classic

I do not give a shit i simp for pokimane

I do not give a shit i simp for pokimane and I'm a tier 3 sub fuck all those amateur's i wanna smell those pretty feet of yours pokimane you know when i was a little boy i used to slap girls ass when i was young and some of them liked it some of them didn't well guess what i wanna do that to pokimane and make her moan "daddy harder" but heh listen i have way more dirtier plans for pokimane heh i bought every single merchandise pokimane has you know i've come soo far don't mess it up you pussy's ok! I will continue to simp i will continue to slap girl's asses and i don't care if it's sexual assault i WILL DO IT. And i could do it to boys too heh well that's it you understand the whole reason why am writing this.
February 2022
Pokimane

Simps

Yep Cock

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠩⠶⣾⣿⡿⢯⣍⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⣠⢤⠈⠋⠀⢠⣄⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⣹⣦⣀⣙⣈⣀⢶⣤⣈⣁⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠼⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡏⠀⠀⠠⣤⠦⣭⣙⣛⠛⠋⠁⠀⠙⠛⢉⣻⣿⣿⣿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠛⠮⣽⣒⣻⣭⢽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⣼⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿ ⡟⠳⢤⣤⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿ ⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠈⠁⠈⠉⠉⡙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢠⣶⠿⠿⣷⡄⠈⣠⣶⠿⢿⣶⡄⠉⣡⣶⠿⠿⣶⡄⠄⣿⡇⢀⣾⡿⠃ ⣿⣏⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⡇⢀⠄⣿⣿⠄⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀ ⠹⣿⣄⣠⣶⡆⠄⢿⣷⣀⣠⣿⡟⠄⢻⣷⣄⣠⣶⠆⠄⣿⡏⠈⢿
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May 2020

Pepe

Saying that the Easter Bunny does not orgasm with every egg laid is considered blasphemy and grounds for excommunication from the Church.

Weird fact: the Easter Bunny was the source of a significant amount of theological debate during the 1200's, as Catholic philosophers debated why God would create a creature in a constant state of labor (and thus suffering). The Catholic Church ultimately resolved this question by declaring that the Easter Bunny orgasmed every time it laid it an egg (which it was doing constantly). This is now codified in Canon Law (the legal code of the Catholic Church and much of Europe in the pre-modern era) and saying that the Easter Bunny does not orgasm with every egg laid is considered blasphemy and grounds for excommunication from the Church.
April 2022

Holiday

Easter

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