[Copypasta] Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
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hey there buddy chum pal friend

twitchquotes: hey there buddy chum pal friend buddy pal chum bud friend fella bruther amigo pal buddy friend chummy chum chum pal i don't mean to be rude my friend pal home slice bread slice dawg but i gotta warn ya if u take one more diddly darn step right there im going to have to diddly darn snap ur neck and wowza wouldn't that be a crummy juncture, huh? do yuo want that? do wish upon yourself to come into physical experience with a crummy juncture? because friend buddy chum friend chum pally pal chum friend if you keep this up well gosh diddly darn i just might have to get not so friendly with u my friendly friend friend pal friend buddy chum pally friend chum buddy...
twitch chat
October 2020

Classic

Holy shit Kim Kardashian is about to be single

Holy shit Kim Kardashian is about to be single. I've waited so long for this moment. This is my chance, my opportunity. God is real. I should chill with the god talk because she's probably over that stuff but im fucking hyped. I am going to shoot my shot. I am not black so my chances are less but I have been doing push ups, eating vitamins and controlling my jacking off.
January 2021

monkaS

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⠿⠟⠋⠉⠁⠀⠈⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⠸⠄⢀⣀⠠⠤⠤⣀⡀⠐⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠾⠂⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠠⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠙⠻⠒⠚⠛⠛⠛⠛⠒⠒⠦⠘⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⠟⠀⠀⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣧⣄⢀⣠⣤⣤⣶⣶⣶⣤⣤⣙⢿ ⠁⢸⠀⠸⠅⠀⠀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⡉⠙⣿⣿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⡉⢻⣿⡆ ⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢉⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣷⣧⣶⡿⠟⠸⠿⠿⣿⡿⠿⠶⠬⠾⠿⢃ ⠓⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠒⠤⠤⠬⠭⠁⣤⠤⠖⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠠⠔⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠑⠢⡄⠒⠒⠂⠰⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡈⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣧⣭⣭⣍⣛⣛⣛⡶⠶⠶⢦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣶⠿⠛⣡⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⢄⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠿⠿⠿⠷⠶⠶⣶⣶⣶⡶⢟⣸⣿⣿ ⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠈⠉⠓⠒⠢⠤⠤⠤⠤⣤⣤⣤⣤⠤⠄⠀⠀⠀⢴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
September 2020

Pepe

Ben Shapiro goes to the movie theatre

let's say, hypothetically, that i went to the movie theater, and the movie i was watching happened to be three hours long. for the sake of the argument, i am about halfway through watching the movie, and i have to go to the bathroom. based on what's happening on screen, i can determine that an important scene is coming up, and that i need to see it if i want to understand the plot. what's stopping me from pissing in the drink cup they gave me for my dr. pepper? if i can do it quietly enough, no one is going to be able to notice what i'm doing, and, in my honest opinion, pissing in the drink cup is a much better alternative to using the bathroom, since i would've missed an important plot point had i chosen to do so. lastly, no one would have to clean it up afterwards, since it's all contained within the drink cup, which is meant to be disposed of after the movie anyways, and, as a result, will not affect the theater staff in any way whatsoever.
December 2020

Ben Shapiro

Maplestory Lucid

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⣪⣭⣿⣷⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠤⢤⢔⡾⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⢰⢳⣿⣿⣿⠋⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⠟⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠔⠁⠀⠀⠀⢸⣼⣷⣻⣧⣴⣿⣏⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⠤ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣷⣿⣏⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⢿⣿⣿⣿⣝⣿⣯⣾⠋⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡄⠀⠀⠙⣽⣝⠋⢡⣯⣀⠘⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⡷⡁⠀⡄⠀⢠⠻⠀⠀⠀⢸⠙⠀⠀⠀⠙⡇⢹⣧⠛⠂⠀⢤⣉⠢⡀⠀⠀ ⡠⢊⠚⢇⣰⢣⠀⡞⠒⠣⠀⠀⠘⡄⠘⠓⠲⢆⣳⠀⠀⣠⣄⣀⣀⠙⢯⣾⡄⠀ ⣇⣇⡌⠈⡜⡌⢳⣧⣤⣄⡑⠄⣀⣳⢀⣠⣤⣴⣾⡆⠀⣿⠖⣠⣮⠀⠀⣿⠇⠀ ⠈⠛⢇⠀⠿⠷⡘⣿⢙⠿⡏⠀⠈⠉⢻⣻⣿⡏⢹⡟⣢⣿⣟⡻⠋⢀⡴⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠈⠢⢤⣀⣋⡿⢮⡉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠈⢉⣙⠷⠛⠺⣿⣙⣛⠭⠝⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡩⠒⠶⠲⠞⠓⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣵⣕⣉⣫⣿⣦⠀⠱⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⡾⡿⡟⣻⣿⡏⠱⣮⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⢿⡛⣿⣾⣜⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⡏⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⣿⠟⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣽⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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April 2020

Weebs

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