[Copypasta] Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Welcome to the Pleb Club

twitchquotes: ༼ ºل͜º༼ ºل͜º༼ ºل͜º ༽ºل͜º ༽ºل͜º ༽ Welcome to the Pleb Club. Here's your VIP ticket for being a Pleb: ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮ ༼ ºل͜º༼ ºل͜º༼ ºل͜º ༽ºل͜º ༽ºل͜º ༽
twitch chat
April 2015
imaqtpie

plebs vs subs

I am a concerned mother with a 13 year old child (among us)

I am a concerned mother with a 13 year old child and I am here to seek help regarding my son. Last week when we went to the supermarket, my son pointed to a red trash can and started jumping around screaming “THAT’S AMONG US! THAT TRASH CAN IS SUS! RED IS THE IMPOSTOR!” As soon as he did that, the manager told us to leave. I told him that my son is just excited about something, and apologised. But the manager still told us to leave so I picked up the red trash can that my son was going crazy over and threw it on the managers head. Then my son shouted “DEAD BODY REPORTED.” Can someone please tell me what on earth is wrong with him?
February 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Trolling My Office With Among Us (Part 3)

So I went into work and I started working. I decided to install Among Us to play, right? But my boss was walking by and said "Hey, why are you playing video games on the work computer?" I said that I was playing Among Us and asked him if he was uncultured. He told me to get out so I said "Quit being sus." And I did the funny imposter is sus grin you guys know? And I slapped his face and yelled "EMERGENCY MEETING!" Everybody in the office was looking at me like I just murdered several bosnian children. So I pulled out my dick and said "Look at this little spaceman!" I took off my pants and ran around the office with my dick flying around. The buff guy, Chad, was chasing me but I just got behind him and humped him. I said "good imposters get butt humps." He screamed and punched me. I ran out work not wanting to work with a bunch of REDDITORPHOBES.
March 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

Ameng be thy name

twitchquotes: Our father who rolls in heaven, Ameng be thy name. thy goats may come, thy will be shattered, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily cheese, and forgive us our throwing, as we forgive those who throw against us, and lead us not into Mayhem, but deliver us from Justice.
twitch chat
May 2019
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

yo

twitchquotes: To ̼̜͈͔̰i̲͓̬̜͓̳ͅn̪̹v̨͚̜̪̠͉̝͉o͕̤̘̻̮̘̭k̦̦̖̠̪e͇͎̙̖ͅ ̭̗͚̠t̻̥h̻͜e̲̩̣̩ ̖̹h̯̟i͕v͏̼͙͖̮͍̞e̺͙͉̦͡-͏̥̻m̷̤i͓n̻̱͍̼̼d͖̜̝̰̳̱͇͟ ̠͍̳ṛ̷e̱͎̟pr̬ḙ̗̫̖͖̜͓̀s̵̗̲͉̭̤en̥̣͟t̨̬͔̣̼̹̘i̶̼͚̻̻n̬g̱̗̩̯̭̬͘ ̻̻̮̪̬ͅc͞h̯̼͇̥ao̫̳̭̲̹̲͟s.̙͓̲͍͉͞ͅ ͖͎̳͕Ìṋ̲̻̞̫̠̫v̛̯͍̞̘̼̮ͅo̬k̻̺͚̲͖ͅi̢n̵͇͖̼g ͓̺͈̬̞͖͉t̰͕̟̭̱̩ḩ̠̪͕͙͓̘̝e̱͖͔͙͝ͅ ̫̲̤͢f̸̻̣̰͔̳̪͚e̯ẹ̤̣̫l̤̀i̢̲̩n҉̲̹g̵̜̺̙͈͔̦̼ ̼̘͙̹͍̟̻͝o̢̟̺̹̮f͜ ͖͕͟c̸̠̤h̠̙͇͉a̳͍̕oș̡.̦͈̱̱̝̣ ͇̗͖̩̣̣͝W̨͎̱̬̞͓̼ḭ͎̖t̳̜̩͕̬͕h ̞̺͇̤̫̤͜o͓͓̮̤u̞̗̰̮̘t̼́ ̖̺̳̩̦̝ͅo͕̝r͔͓̗d͇̩̙͟ḙ̻̫̭̯̣r̸͉̯̠̯̥̺.̺̼͚̳̘͈͈ ̮̳͉̖͟Ț̛̠̙͍̻͚͖h͟e͈̪̙̗̰̖ ̛̠̹̜̲̞͖ͅN͔̪̼̬̗͉͟e̫͔̼͉̹z̬̠p̯͈̰̯̫͡è̪͖͉͓̼͇r̻͝d̲i͓̻̳̼̘͜a̧͈̲n͉̮̻͈̯͘ ͚̼̝h̯̰̞̥͉͈i̷͓̖͓̟ͅv̷̭͎̳̰e͇͔͍̩̭-̠̟̣̺̱̣̹m͍̬̳͚̙i̝̭n̪͖̳d̻͟ ̞̠͔̹o̢̖̺͈͓͖͎f̭̬̥͍̳̜ ̣̣̪̻̹̥̙c͢h̶a̛̼̙̞̜̮͓o͓̣͕͙̫̩͢ͅs͙.͎̱̹̳͍̫͚͢ ҉͓͕̱̟͓Z͔͈͓̙̮̮̭̀àl̞̥͎̜g̝o.̻͉͚͢ ͕̦͖̹͙̙͓H̘͇̖e͝ ̰̹̭͡wh̺̺͔͙o͕̖̱͕̖̞͉ ̦W̺a̖̱̙̙̬̺̘i̘̻̮̲t͙s̵͈ ̟̕B̛̯e͔͘hi̺ͅn͕͚̣̟̼͘d ̟͠T̵̞h̘̭̝̭̺̀ẹ̸͇ ̘̖̖̟̪̼̞̀W̧͙̱̠a̫ll.̱̥̣͙̤̮ͅ ̩͙͍̝͔Z͏̲̝̜̹̹̱A̴͕̲̥̟͖͈̭Ḷ͞G͇͙̣̞O̸̖͍͕!̛̻
twitch chat
July 2014
Kaceytron
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