[Copypasta] Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Zven checks his PayPal

twitchquotes: After his loss, Zven stays up deep into the night. As the rest of TSM sleeps, he opens up a new window to check his PayPal. A smile stretches across his face
twitch chat
April 2019
Riot Games

Classic

League of Legends

Auto-Pay feature

twitchquotes: Hello Octavian Kripparrian, Marvel Future Fight devs here. We have noticed you have used our "Auto-Play" functionality extensively today, with much better results than when you played the game yourself. Because of this success, we are happy to announce another brand-new feature: "Auto-Pay". We have seen you spend a large amount of time inefficiently upgrading your character, and this time is better spent Auto-Playing. Please click the "Auto-Pay" button, and let your Credit Card do the work!
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

sellout

Classic

BabyRage NI HAO BLIZZARD

twitchquotes: πŸ“ž BabyRage NI HAO BLIZZARD πŸ“ž BabyRage WO XIANG BAO GAO YI GE CUO WU πŸ“ž BabyRage WO DE DUI SHOU ZHENG ZAI WAN KA πŸ“ž BabyRage
twitch chat
July 2017

Hearthstone

Boom PepegaAim

twitchquotes: πŸ’₯ πŸ’₯ β € β € β € β € β € πŸ’₯ β € β € β € β € β € πŸ’₯ β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € πŸ’₯ β € β € β € β € β € πŸ’₯ β € β € β € β € β € PepegaAim β € β € β € β € β € β € LULW β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € πŸ’₯ β € β € β € β € β € πŸ’₯ β € β € β € β € β € β € πŸ’₯ σ €€ σ €€ σ €€
twitch chat
December 2019

CSGO

β€œRatio” shut up. Shut the fuck up

β€œRatio” shut up. Shut the fuck up. Nobody cares! You’re gonna get the negative side of this ratio that you so care about. Shut the fuck up. I thought Reddit was bad enough but now it’s borrowing from Twitter. Nobody gives a shit about the like ratio, nobody gives a shit about your retarded comment. Take my advice and shut the fuck up!
July 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing