[Copypasta] Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Hey, kripp! ¿Qué pasa, hombre?

twitchquotes: Hey, kripp! ¿Qué pasa, hombre? Es Jeff de la clase de Historia del último semestre. No sabía que eras una especie de celebridad famosa hahahaha. Batirme, hombre. Por cierto, ¿alguna vez te uniste a Brian? Él era un niño de T H I C C. XD Eres un perro así. Es genial verte de nuevo. ¡Golpéame en algún momento!
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

PASTE THIS SQUID TO HELP TEAM LIQUID

twitchquotes: PASTE Squid3 THIS Squid3 SQUID Squid3 TO Squid3 HELP Squid3 TEAM Squid3 LIQUID Squid3
twitch chat
April 2019

Rhyme Chant

League of Legends

Putin should start an OnlyFans to save the Russian economy

Think about it. The Russian economy is in shambles. All assets frozen, there's no money coming in. But if he just spread that hiney for some people who would like it then why not? With a couple butt spread pictures maybe a ruble can be worth more than a potato again. Here are some content ideas that I suggest: Wanking Videos (pretty basic, these are the cheapest ones cuz his dick🍆 is like 1 cm🥜) Body Worship Videos (kinda hot ngl 😳😌😰, all his dick sucking oligarchs oil his body and touch him in ways he never thought possible👉👌👋🤛) Sanction Bukkake (a livestream where in a dick cums on his face every time he gets a sanction🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆💦💦💦💦💦💦💦) Lukashenko Sex Tapes (these are pretty expensive, a collection of Vladdy Daddy and Lukashenskank cumming with every position in the Kamasutra💃🕺♋🏇🐕) Nuke-In-Crack Challenge (the most expensive one! This is where he fills his hole with the invaluable Russian crude oil and tries to fit a Nuclear Warhead up his ass! ⛽☢️🍑🎆) What u guys think?
March 2022

Russian Ukrainian War

Twitch Chat Examination Team

twitchquotes: Hello this is the Twitch Chat Examination Team here with anther experiment. We are testing how quickly a message typed into chat is copied and pasted by the mindless hordes. Please, if you're reading this, spread awareness for our cause.
twitch chat
March 2015
imaqtpie

The salt from your stream sucked the venom out of my wound

twitchquotes: Dear reynard. I was hiking in the Amazon Rainforest the other day when I was bit by a snake. Miles from the nearest city, I thought my life was over as the venom slowly spread across my body. But then I used my 4G to open twitch and the salt from your stream sucked the venom out of my wound and saved my life. Thanks Reynad!
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad
Text-to-Speech Playing