[Copypasta] Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Anime girl 3

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–โ–โ–โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–Œโ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–Œโ–Œโ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–โ–โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’
January 2017

Weebs

me preds egg rolls

twitchquotes: last week i was out really late walking through a dark alley and out of nowhere i hear "me preds" then a small asian boy wearing a kakashi cosplay came out of nowhere screaming "me preds" over and over telling me to sell my kogmaws and reksais. The same guy got me again today but this time he was saying something about egg rolls .
twitch chat
December 2019

Teamfight Tactics

Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp

Wagner Opera Topdeckhoffen

twitchquotes: Gแดœแด›แด‡ษด Tแด€ษข, Hแด‡ส€ส€ Kส€ษชแด˜แด˜! Mแด‡ษชษด Nแด€แดแด‡ ษชsแด› Pแด‡แด›แด‡ส€ แด แดษด Pแด€sแด›แด‡ษดสœแดา“า“แด‡ษด. Hแด‡ส€แด‡ ษชษด Dแด‡แดœแด›sแด„สœสŸแด€ษดแด… แดกแด‡ แด€ส€แด‡ แดแด€แด‹ษชษดษข ษดแด‡แดก Wแด€ษขษดแด‡ส€ แดแด˜แด‡ส€แด€ Tแดแด˜แด…แด‡แด„แด‹สœแดา“า“แด‡ษด. Rแด€ษดษชแด€ ษชs Vแด€สŸแด‹สส€ษชษดแด, แด€ษดแด… แด‹ษชสŸสŸs สแดแดœ ษชษด ส€แด‡แด แด‡ษดษขแด‡ า“แดส€ แด…แด€s Pแดส€ษดสœแดœส™. Tส€แดœแดแด˜ แด˜แดแดœส€s Oส€แด€ษดษขแด‡ษดsแด€า“แด› แดษด สแดแดœส€ ษขส€แด€แด แด‡, แด€ษดแด… สแดแดœ แด€แด˜แด˜แด‡แด€ส€ ษชษด sแด‹ส แด€s แด„แด€sแดœแด€สŸ ษขสœแดsแด›แด‡ส€ษชษดแด. PสŸแดข ษดแด แด„แดแด˜แด˜แด‡ษด แด˜แด€sแด›แด‡ษด แด…แดแดษขแด‡ษด แด…แด€แด€ษขแด‡ษด.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

I hate taking shits

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks. TL;DR I hate shitting
April 2022
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