[Copypasta] Your cat is plotting to destroy you

twitchquotes: I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
twitch chat
February 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
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i was raised to serve my wife

twitchquotes: call me old fashioned but i was raised to serve my wife. i clean the dishes and cook her food. i do whatever she says bc she is my wife and she makes the rules around the house. she owns me. i am her property. if she ever cheats on me it's bc i was lacking.
twitch chat
May 2020

Simps

Can you guys critique my portfolio? New investor looking for guidance

Not sure if this is the best place to post this but I just inherited 1.5M from my distant uncle and want to make him proud. Right now my portfolio I have: 10% LUCK 20% SKLZ 15% CPW 5% PLTR 50% PAIN and 100% R.TO (RTN) is this an ok for a beginner looking for conservative annual 37% gains?
March 2021

WallStreetBets

Not financial advise

I'm starting to think the people telling me to buy BB at $20 were being serious about not being financial advisors
April 2021

WallStreetBets

"Based"? Are "Based"? Are you fucking kidding me?

"Based"? Are you fucking kidding me? I spent a decent portion of my life writing all of that and your response to me is "Based"? Are you so mentally handicapped that the only word you can comprehend is "Based" - or are you just some fucking asshole who thinks that with such a short response, he can make a statement about how meaningless what was written was? Well, I'll have you know that what I wrote was NOT meaningless, in fact, I even had my written work proof-read by several professors of literature. Don't believe me? I doubt you would, and your response to this will probably be "Based" once again. Do I give a fuck? No, does it look like I give even the slightest fuck about five fucking letters? I bet you took the time to type those five letters too, I bet you sat there and chuckled to yourself for 20 hearty seconds before pressing "send". You're so fucking pathetic. I'm honestly considering directing you to a psychiatrist, but I'm simply far too nice to do something like that. You, however, will go out of your way to make a fool out of someone by responding to a well-thought-out, intelligent, or humorous statement that probably took longer to write than you can last in bed with a chimpanzee. What do I have to say to you? Absolutely nothing. I couldn't be bothered to respond to such a worthless attempt at a response. Do you want "Based" on your gravestone?
August 2021

Based

Classic

Among Us In Real Life Song Lyrics (Emojipasta)

AMONG ๐Ÿ˜ณ US ๐Ÿ…ฑ๏ธ IN ๐Ÿ˜ฑ REAL ๐Ÿ˜ต LIFE ๐Ÿ’ฉ SUS ๐Ÿ“ฎ SUS AMONG ๐Ÿ˜ณ US ๐Ÿ…ฑ๏ธ IN ๐Ÿ˜ฑ REAL ๐Ÿ˜ต LIFE ๐Ÿ’ฉ SUS ๐Ÿ“ฎ SUS PLAYING ๐Ÿˆ AMONG ๐Ÿ’€ US ๐Ÿ˜ก IN ๐Ÿค— REAL ๐Ÿค  LIFE SPACESHIP ๐Ÿš€ WITH ๐Ÿ‘พ MY ๐Ÿ‘… CREW GOTTA ๐Ÿฅท๐Ÿฟ SPLIT ๐Ÿ˜š UP ๐Ÿคก SPREAD โ‰๏ธ OUT ๐Ÿ“ฎCUZ ๐Ÿ˜ƒ WE ๐Ÿ˜‹ ALL ๐Ÿ˜ GOT ๐Ÿ˜ฏ TASKS ๐Ÿ‘ป TO ๐Ÿ‘ฝ DO GOTTA ๐Ÿ‘ฟ FIND ๐Ÿ‘บ THE ๐Ÿคง IMPOSTER ๐Ÿคซ AS ๐Ÿ‘€ THEY ๐Ÿ›– TRY ๐Ÿ—ฟ TO ๐Ÿ›ถ SA๐Ÿ…ฑ๏ธOTAGE WHO ๐Ÿ“ฎCAN ๐Ÿ…ฑ๏ธ WE ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ท TRUST ๐Ÿ˜‚ IN ๐Ÿคช THIS ๐Ÿคฏ AMONG ๐Ÿคญ US ๐Ÿคฃ ENTOURAGE.
June 2021

Emoji Pasta

Among Us / Amogus

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