[Copypasta] Twitch's terrible Bounty commercial

twitchquotes: Four people on me. Quick I need help. Dash, we're on then way. Come on guys we got this. NOOOO. NOOOO.Quick! The quicker picker upper.A spill? No biggie.That's right chat, ya GOTTA have Bounty at your battle station. My man! Let's get back into this. Cover Me, cover me. Guy's I'm still knocked over here. Bounty. The Quicker Picker-upper.
twitch chat
June 2020
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b9hssN3dCZw
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Donald Trump with mic

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠋⠉⡉⣉⡛⣛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣸⣿⣿⡿⠿⡯⢙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⡀⠄⢀⣀⣉⣉⣉⠁⠐⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⣿⣿⣀⠈⠿⢟⡛⠛⣿⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠁⠰⣄⣴⡬⢵⣴⣿⣤⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⢀⢄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⡉⠻⣿⡿⠁⠘⠛⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠄⠄⠈⠻⠄⠄⠄⠄⢘⣧⣀⠾⠿⠶⠦⢳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡀⢀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⢣⣶⡒⠶⢤⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠄⢘⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⠻⠻⠺⣼⣿⠟⠋⠛⠿⣿⣿ ⠋⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣶⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣷⡤⠄⠰⡆⠄⠄⠈⠉⠛⠿⢦⣀⡀⡀⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⠟⡋⠄⠄⠄⢣⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠹⣿⣀ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣷⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⢺⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠸⣿⡄⠄⠈⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⢹⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘
ascii art
August 2019

AITA for not going to my friend’s funeral home if he isn’t coming to mine?

So me (69m) and my friend (69m) were at waffle house (7300 Innerplan Dr, North Little Rock, Arkansas 72113-7645, US) and were discussing funerals (6-9k). I mentioned that since I will be attending his funeral (approx. 2032) that it would be impudent for him not to turn up to mine (approx. 2036). Long story short, this lead for him to swing a naughty haymaker (right) directly aiming for my jaw when I rapidly dodged and gave the cheeky cunt a swift uppercut (broken nose). He is now hospitalized (critical condition) and I am now currently evading law enforcement (on foot). My family (69f wife, 54m son, 69f wife) have been trying to contact me but I keep telling them if I ever see that punk again, I will give him a little combo (right hook, left hook, headbutt then roundhouse kick). If he is still moving I will stomp on his head until he is a little red smear on the bottom of my boot (black timberlands). I know I’m right but I feel as if I may have overreacted a tiny bit (not too much) AITA?
November 2019

Am I The Asshole?

Viewbot #420

twitchquotes: (Viewbot #420) MrDestructoid Hello Mr. Michael "Imaqtpie" Santana, I am here to "view" your channel as was previously discussed.
twitch chat
February 2017
imaqtpie

Viewbots

Bloomberg terminal vs toilet trading

Imagine spending 20K on a bloomberg terminal and thousands on hardware just to get smoke checked by some retards on the toilet trading on their phone that are not only on the spectrum but might be the actual spectrum.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

not an weeb thing

twitchquotes: ‘not an weeb thing’. try living a day in my shoes, walking around terrified of encountering normal people everywhere i go. wherever i look, people with tv show merch, people speaking english. it makes me and millions of other weebs out there feel really attacked.
twitch chat
February 2019
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing