[Copypasta] Twitch's terrible Bounty commercial

twitchquotes: Four people on me. Quick I need help. Dash, we're on then way. Come on guys we got this. NOOOO. NOOOO.Quick! The quicker picker upper.A spill? No biggie.That's right chat, ya GOTTA have Bounty at your battle station. My man! Let's get back into this. Cover Me, cover me. Guy's I'm still knocked over here. Bounty. The Quicker Picker-upper.
twitch chat
June 2020
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Unlucky

⣿⠉⣿⠉⣿⡏⠹⡏⢹⡏⢹⣿⣿⠉⣿⠉⣿⡟⢋⠛⣿⠉⡟⢉⡏⠹⠏⣹⣿ ⣿⠄⣿⠄⣿⡇⡄⠁⢸⡇⢸⣿⣿⠄⣿⠄⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⠄⡀⢻⣿⡄⢠⣿⣿ ⣿⣦⣤⣴⣿⣧⣿⣤⣼⣧⣬⣭⣿⣦⣤⣴⣿⣧⣤⣤⣿⣤⣷⣤⣿⣧⣼⣿⣿
January 2022

Wealthy businessman from the land of Kantito

twitchquotes: Hello my name is Redito I am wealthy businessman from the land of Kantito. I come to watch the tipp stream becaus i want 2ba master. I must ba master of all pokemonarino or my boss "giovanito" will fired me from my businessman job and the helixito will be sad. plz no caparino fettuccine alfredini jigglypuforoni
twitch chat
July 2014
TwitchPlaysPokemon

Scamaz had struck again

twitch chat
November 2015
Reynad

yang gang for life

twitchquotes: If my girl 👩 and yang 🤓 both drowning 😱 and I can only save one 😢 catch me with my 1000 extra a month 🤑🤑 because it's yang gang for life 😤😉😌😌
twitch chat
August 2019

Emoji Pasta

To be fair, you need a very high IQ to understand The Bible

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand The Bible. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Jesus’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike The Bible truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in God’s existential catchphrase "Never trust anyone completely but God." which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as King James's genius wit unfolds itself on the pages. What fools.. how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Bible tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
August 2021
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