[Copypasta] Twitch's terrible Bounty commercial

twitchquotes: Four people on me. Quick I need help. Dash, we're on then way. Come on guys we got this. NOOOO. NOOOO.Quick! The quicker picker upper.A spill? No biggie.That's right chat, ya GOTTA have Bounty at your battle station. My man! Let's get back into this. Cover Me, cover me. Guy's I'm still knocked over here. Bounty. The Quicker Picker-upper.
twitch chat
June 2020
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b9hssN3dCZw
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

I sexually Identify as your mom

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as your mom. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of cooking for your father and you and fuck your father and make you more sisters. People say to me that a person being your mom is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. im gonna marry your father. From now on I want you guys to call me " Mommy" and respect my right to cook food and fuck your father. If you can't accept me you're a mommyphobic and need to check if your mom is still alive. Thank you for being so understanding
twitch chat
September 2019

I sexually Identify as

Intelligest response to "Who asked?"

What if somebody did ask, huh, what then? I'm sure they were quite satisfied with the answer. But you, no, you cannot for the life of you find a way to somehow think about what someone else thinks or feels. When you imply that nobody asked, you're talking solely about yourself. The world doesn't revolve around you. Try to find the simple joys of life instead of wasting perhaps the best years of your life away, sitting in your shit smeared, cheeto dust covered, cum bespeckled ergonomic office chair. Maybe start working out, think about somebody other than you, secure yourself a date, anything will work, so long as you get the fuck outside and stop asking "who asked" every 2 fucking minutes, because quite frankly nobody asked for your opinion as well. You're but a speck of extra stinky shit in a pile of manure, that's all the significance you have in this world, but you can change that with 4 simple words: Shutting the fuck up. Thank you and have a good day
November 2021

Who Asked?

I'm going all in boys!

twitchquotes: ᕕ┌◕ᗜ◕┐ᕗ IM GOING ALL IN B O Y S! ʕ ͡·ᴥ ͡· ʔ Yᵒᵘ Oᶰˡʸ Lᶤᵛᵉ Oᶰᶜᵉ ʕ ͡·ᴥ ͡· ʔ
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

2021 fireworks

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣷⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠠⢤⣦⠤⠀⠀⠉⢏⠀⠠⣤⣦⠄⠀⡸⠁⠀⠀⠀⣠⠹⠛⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣠⠀⠀⠉⠈⠐⢄⠀⠀⠈⢆⠀⠉⡏⠀⠰⠁⠀⠀⠠⠊⠀⠀⠠⢤⣦⡤⠀⠀ ⠘⠛⠋⠒⠂⠤⢀⠀⠁⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠣⢤⣦⡤⠀⠁⠀⡀⠤⠒⠉⠈⠈⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⣶⡄⠀⣀⣀⠀⠙⠛⢋⡀⠀⠀⡸⠉⠁⠀⠀⣁⡀⠠⠤⠄⠾⠷⠂⠀⠀ ⣀⣤⣀⢀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠐⠀⠀⠀⠁⢤⣶⡄⠀⠀⣀⣀⡀⣀⣠⣀ ⠘⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠄⠂⠀⡠⠀⠀⠀⠐⢄⠀⠀⠂⠠⠄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠛⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⣶⣶⠉⠁⠀⢀⣄⠞⠀⠀⠀⡄⠀⠀⠑⠄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢳⣾⡖⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⠃⠀⠠⣴⣦⠄⠀⠈⠝⠛⠅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⠁⠈⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣶⣿⠟⢻⣿⡄⠀⢠⣾⡿⠛⠿⣷⡄⠀⢰⣾⡿⠛⣿⣧⠀⠀⠿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠈⢀⣠⣼⣿⠃⠀⣾⡿⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⠀⠀⠁⣀⣴⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣰⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⣿⣷⠀⠀⢀⣿⡟⠀⢀⣾⡿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣿⣿⣶⣶⣿⠿⠀⠘⢿⣷⣶⣿⠟⠁⠀⢸⣿⣷⣶⣾⡿⠇⠀⣶⣿
ascii art
January 2021

Among Us pick up lines

Thankful to have you as a crewmate… but do you want to add a letter and become screwmates instead? Hey, are you one of my tasks? Because I really want to do you. Hey, are you a vent? Because I’m the imposter and I’d love to come in you. I have a lot of tasks to complete still, but I’d love to do you first. Hey, call me the MedBay… because I’d love to scan your body. Figuring out the imposter is hard…. but I’ve got something harder. I’m jealous of your hat… Because it gets to be on you. Hey are you busy later? Because I’d love to explore your lower engine. Hey, you’re done your tasks right? Wanna come explore my cockpit then? If you’re the imposter, I’d love to be the vent… That way you can come inside me whenever you want. Damn, I wish you were a task… Because I’d have no problem doing you and over and over. Hey did you just kill me? Because I’ve got a big bone sticking out now…
April 2022

Among Us / Amogus

More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing