[Copypasta] Twitch's terrible Bounty commercial

twitchquotes: Four people on me. Quick I need help. Dash, we're on then way. Come on guys we got this. NOOOO. NOOOO.Quick! The quicker picker upper.A spill? No biggie.That's right chat, ya GOTTA have Bounty at your battle station. My man! Let's get back into this. Cover Me, cover me. Guy's I'm still knocked over here. Bounty. The Quicker Picker-upper.
twitch chat
June 2020
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b9hssN3dCZw
I used to be a real ad
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This chat is now under the sole proprietorship of Sebastian "Forsen" Fors

twitchquotes: ******ATTENTION ***** ( อกยฐ อœส– อกยฐ) This chat is now under the sole proprietorship of Sebastian "Forsen" Fors. Please type forsen W (no space), into your chat box to verify yourself as a follower of Forsen. Those who do not verify themselves and are caught posting in this chat will be persecuted to the fullest extent of the law ( อกยฐ อœส– อกยฐ).
twitch chat
March 2015
Trump

Think again next time you call our chatroom yours

twitchquotes: You banned someone for posting something in "your chatroom"? I'll have you know that we, CHAT, rule this chatroom. We MAKE you, we OWN you, we pay your bills, we pay for your food, we pay for the small trojan box of condoms you bought last night, this isn't your chatroom bud. This is our chatroom . Think again next time you call our chatroom yours, it's ours.
twitch chat
June 2017

Bear King Burry vs TSLA

Bear King Michael Burry in the ring, slappin TSLA with a metal chair. His glass eye open wide with rage as he batters TSLA relentlessly. "The valuation..." crunch "makes...." crunch "NO.... " crunch "SENSE!" he roars with maniacal autistic glee. TSLA struggles for the edge of the ring, but coughs blood as each hit lands, and eventually stops moving. Bear King Burry drops the chair. Bear King Burry turns to the crowd "Was this your champion!? Was TSLA supposed to be your chosen one!?" A child in the crowd turns his face into his mother's side and cries. On the side of the ring WSB can barely move. TSLA was supposed to tag them in, but couldn't make it to the side in time. "Get up TSLA" WSB whimpers hopelessly, a single tear rolling down their cheek. "Get up..." Bear King Burry turns to WSB "Now it is your portfolio's turn. Get in here you little bitch." "Excuse me." Someone replies from behind BKB. "I believe I can give you the fight you want." A robed figure is administering smelling salts to TSLA. The figure puts TSLA on its shoulder and carries TSLA gently out of the ring. "And just who the fuck do you think you are?" BKB rumbles ominously. BKB's fingers squeeze so tightly on the chair that metal bends. "Who am I?" the robed figure inquires. The robed figure stands straight and stretches to their full height. They must be at least 7' tall. The crowd stops crying and watches in stunned silence. "Who am I?" The figure repeats menacingly. The figure turns around to face BKB, ripping off his robe. A gleaming light fills the stadium. Before us stands a Golden deity, rippling with muscle. If there is an ounce of body fat it is currently in hiding, only to make way for seemingly endless coiled golden musculature. The figure looks directly into Bear King Burry's eyes. "I'm Goldman Sachs, and i'm here to kill you."
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Spiderman Bill makes his web on the hill

twitchquotes: ,/โ•ฒ/\โ•ญเผผ KKona เผฝโ•ฎ/\โ•ฑ \ Spiderman Bill makes his web on the hill ,/โ•ฒ/\โ•ญเผผ KKona เผฝโ•ฎ/\โ•ฑ \
twitch chat
October 2015
Reynad

Spider

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–€โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–’โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–“โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–โ–Œโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–โ–ˆโ–Œโ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–’โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
November 2014
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