[Copypasta] Twitch's terrible Bounty commercial

twitchquotes: Four people on me. Quick I need help. Dash, we're on then way. Come on guys we got this. NOOOO. NOOOO.Quick! The quicker picker upper.A spill? No biggie.That's right chat, ya GOTTA have Bounty at your battle station. My man! Let's get back into this. Cover Me, cover me. Guy's I'm still knocked over here. Bounty. The Quicker Picker-upper.
twitch chat
June 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Big shoutout to NA LCS

twitchquotes: Big shoutout to NA LCS. My mother has sleep anxiety problems, but on weekends she sleeps like a bear. All I ask of her is to watch 10 minutes of NA LCS.
twitch chat
July 2015
Riot Games

Classic

League of Legends

EU vs NA

Six foot antlers

twitchquotes: I bet all you beta f*gs don't wear antlers either. Science has shown that the male deers with the largest antlers attract the most females, so obviously the exact same principle works for human females. When I walk into the club reeking of sweat with six foot antlers strapped to my head, I get the attention of every female in the room. Pretty much ever man too, that's how powerful the effect is.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

I just shit and cum FAQ (Reddit)

I just shit and cum. # FAQ ## What does this mean? The amount of shit (and cum) on my computer and floor has increased by one. ## Why did you do this? There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be worthy of feces or ejaculation. These include, but are not limited to: * Being gay * Dank copypasta bro, where'd you find it * walter ## Am I going to shit and cum too? No - not yet. But you should refrain from shitposting and cumposting like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to shit and cum again, which may put your shitting and cumming privileges in jeopardy. ## I don't believe my comment deserved being shit and cum at. Can you un-cum it? Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I put shit back into my butt. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me a hot load explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to retaliatory ejaculation within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of semen dies before it can fertilize the egg, and yours is likely no exception. ## How can I prevent this from happening in the future? Accept the goopy brown and white substance and move on. But learn from this mistake: your behavior will not be tolerated in my mom's basement. I will continue to shit and cum until you improve your conduct. Remember: ejaculation is privilege, not a right.
November 2021

FeelsFurryMan

⠄⠄⢀⣤⣤⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⣶⣿⢱⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢠⠈⣿⣿⣿⣷⡦⢀⣤⣤⣤⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⡀⠴⠶⠿⢿⣿⣿⢸⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠸⣧⠹⢿⣿⡿⢡⣾⣿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣶⣄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣝⢿⢸⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣿⣧⡌⠿⢡⣿⣩⣴⣾⣿⣿⣶⣬⣝⡃⠟⣫⣭⣭⣭⣭⣥⡘⢿⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⡟⢫⣭⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣦⢻⡟⢫⣶⠒⠒⠒⣶⣤⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣙⣥⣴⣿⣿⡟⠥⠞⣫⣭⠁⠂⠄⢲⣶⣬⡈⢙⣩⠄⠂⠄⢰⣦⣭⣁⠄⠄ ⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣍⣛⣀⠄⠄⣚⣋⡉⣰⣞⣛⣂⣀⣀⣘⣋⠉⠉⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡿⣋⣥⣾⣿⣿⠿⠟⠟⠻⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠏⣁⣀⠆⠿⢉⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡀⠄⠰⢶⣰⠿⠿⢿⣉ ⠿⠟⢛⣩⣭⣥⣶⠶⢚⣩⣄⠄⠺⠿⠻⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⠷⠄⠐⣉⡓⠲⠤ ⣶⣿⡿⠟⠛⣉⣴⡾⠄⣉⠤⠤⢭⣍⣛⣛⣓⡒⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⢚⣛⡛⠉⠙⢦⣄ ⠋⣥⣶⡾⠿⢋⣡⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⡭⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠉ ⡿⠄⠃⢤⣄⣛⡛⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣶⣿⣿⣶⣶⣬⣭⣭⣭⣙⣓⣒⣒⣒⣒⣒⣒⣰⣶⣦⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
November 2021

Pepe

Please stop the ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ in your chat

twitchquotes: Hello KRIPP aka GRIPPARRIAN. Please stop the ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ in your chat. I am from dubai and "ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ " means "your aunt has a goat ***" in arabic. I am watching with family after my aunt's funeral and we all find this extremely offensive. Will subscribe so you can fist me like a bro when it stops. Please no dan marino gran torino
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing