[Copypasta] Twitch's terrible Bounty commercial

twitchquotes: Four people on me. Quick I need help. Dash, we're on then way. Come on guys we got this. NOOOO. NOOOO.Quick! The quicker picker upper.A spill? No biggie.That's right chat, ya GOTTA have Bounty at your battle station. My man! Let's get back into this. Cover Me, cover me. Guy's I'm still knocked over here. Bounty. The Quicker Picker-upper.
twitch chat
June 2020
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b9hssN3dCZw
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Priced in

Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
December 2020

Classic

WallStreetBets

Salt mines are now Greece's #1 export

twitchquotes: Hello Mr. Kripp, on behalf of the entire Greek country, I would like to thank you for single handedly restoring our economy with your endless supplies of salt. Salt mines are now Greece's #1 export. Most excellent, all hail Kripperino!
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Lisa Ann wants Trick2g to be in the porn industry

twitch chat
July 2014
Trick2g

Frog of Ice

twitchquotes: Ａｎｄ ｔｈｅｎ ｆｒｏｍ ｔｈｅ ｃｌｏｕｄｓ ｏｆ ｃｙｂｅｒ ｓｐａｃｅ， ａ ｃｈｉｌｌ ｗｉｎｄ ｂｌｅｗ ｕｐｏｎ ａ ｍｅｒｅ Ｐａｓｔｅｒ ｐｌｅｂ， ｉｔ ｗａｓ ｔｈｅ ｆｒｏｇ ｏｆ ｉｃｅ， ａｎｄ ｈｅ ｕｎｖｅｉｌｅｄ ｕｐｏｎ ｈｉｍ ｔｈｅ ｒｅｖｅｌａｔｉｏｎｓ． ｔｈｅ ｒｅｖｅｌａｔｉｏｎｓ ｆｏｒｅｔｏｌｄ ｏｆ ａ ｎｅｗ ｐａｔｃｈ， ａ ｓａｖｉｏｒ． ａ ｍｅｓｓｉａｈ， ｔｈｅ ｒｉｓｅ ｏｆ ａ ｎｅｗ ｈｅｒｏ ａｎｄ ｔｈｅ ｄｏｗｎｆａｌｌ ｏｆ ｏｔｈｅｒｓ． Ｔｈｅ ｍｅｒｅ ｐｌｅｂ＇ｓ ｆｅｅｔ ｎｅａｒｌｙ ｃｏｌｌａｐｓｅｄ ｕｎｄｅｒ ｈｉｍ ａｓ ｈｅ ｗａｓ ｔｈｕｎｄｅｒｓｔｒｕｃｋ ｂｙ ｔｈｅ ｋｎｏｗｌｅｄｇｅ ａｎｄ ｈｅ ｒａｎ ｗｉｔｈ ｗｈａｔ ｅｖｅｒ ｂｒｅａｔｈ ｗａｓ ｗｉｔｈｉｎ ｈｉｍ ｔｏ ｓｐｒｅａｄ ｔｈｅ ｇｏｏｄ ｎｅｗｓ．
twitch chat
April 2015
SingSing

Learn the ways of the Russians

twitchquotes: Learn the ways of the Russians, speak their language for a while, they might think you are one of them. Then maybe join their team, success might come and fighting for last drink of vodka will be your next objective. Do not give up, you have Dota tournament ahead of you. Then win TI1, but don't stop now, you have to go deeper. Spend 3 more years trying to solve the puzzle of russki power of motherland and then leave the team with full knowledge of understanding of strenght of ROSSIA and PROMISE URSELF THET YU WILL NEVER LOS TO RUS AND KNOW OF COLLAPSING STRONG EMPIRE OF RUSKILAND.
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen
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