[Copypasta] Useless Spotify ad

twitchquotes: Thanks for listening to Spotify. No, really. You could've listened to the radio. You could've spun some vinyl. You could've played a cassette tape. You could've listened to an eight track tape, if you knew what an eight track tape looked like. But you listened to Spotify. Thanks for that. And you still have hundreds of more playlists to enjoy
twitch chat
May 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

I used to work at an abortion clinic

I used to work at an abortion clinic and I saw some extremely fucked up shit there which is why I'm so anti-abortion now. This is just SOME of the horrible stuff I personally witnessed: • ⁠A 23 year old woman came in 11 months into her pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid baby anymore, kill it" and the doctor said "okay" and he put jumper cables up her baby hole and connected them to a car battery and let it run for six days straight • ⁠A little 8-year old girl wandered in and said "I want an abortion but I am not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll fix that" and he stole a baby and cut the girl open and put the baby inside her and sewed her shut and then woke the girl up and said "congratulations it's a healthy six year old boy" and the girl said "can I keep him" and the doctor said no and then backed over her in the parking lot with his brand new Ford Raptor • ⁠They made me sign an agreement promising to stop drinking from the medical waste container (I signed somebody else's name) • ⁠One of the doctors there developed a futuristic ray gun that could make anything he shot have an abortion, even trees, cars, or barns • ⁠The receptionist threw nail polish at an elderly man • ⁠The doctor's assistant invented this thing she called "the silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected a woman's vagina to a paper shredder so a newborn baby could briefly "enjoy the high life" • ⁠The oldest child we aborted was in his late 70s, we didn't even know he was a baby until his wife brought in photos • ⁠The doctors put all sorts of crap up a woman's uterus including a clown nose, bicycle handlebars, a calendar, and an entire Sears retail outlet (before bankruptcy) • ⁠During every successful abortion, the doctor would shout "take that, baby" and he'd push a red button that made sirens go off and confetti fell from the ceiling and we'd all get Del Taco for free
August 2021

NSFW

TSM Oriental

twitchquotes: Am I seriously the only one offended by Samsung White? They would be ranting and raving if we had a team TSM Oriental or something. Jeez
twitch chat
October 2014
Riot Games

League of Legends

Chibi Vayne

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠻⠋⠭⣭⠻⠟⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄⠄⠁⠨⢰⠤⡐⡘⡙⠻⠟⠛⠻⡿⣷⣜⡛⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠈⠄⠄⠄⠈⣀⣨⣤⣥⣦⣦⣤⡂⠱⡞⢸⣿⣿⣟⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢻⣿⡇⠂⠄⡀⠄⣕⣵⢿⣿⢿⣿⣟⣿⣝⡆⠁⠨⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣴⣿⣿⣿⠁⢁⠄⠤⠁⠉⢫⠮⡻⡿⠿⡓⠑⠩⠉⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢉⣶⣿⣿⢁⡢⠑⢅⠄⠐⠈⠄⣬⣾⣳⣄⢂⠠⡠⢹⣿⣿⡿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣻⣄⣦⣾⡿⢿⣿⣷⡌⠌⠢⡫⡪⡾⣽⢿⣺⣯⣻⣯⢯⣫⣿⣿⢞⢾⢜⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣮⣿⣖⢀⠄⠈⠎⠝⠹⡹⡳⡋⡓⠽⣑⢺⣻⡏⣽⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠄⠁⣿⡷⠆⡐⠐⡐⡀⣲⢳⠨⡚⢞⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⡥⣼⢝⡠⣥⣦⣔⢆⡩⡼⣤⢵⣮⢸⡪⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⡈⡁⠠⣿⣿⣿⣐⠈⠊⡊⠂⠯⠻⠁⠁⢼⣿⢰⢱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠌⠄⠠⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⡆⡎⡔⡐⠄⠁⢈⠅⢢⠺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣎⡪⣸⣿⣿⡿⠿⣋⠂⠄⡂⠨⡈⠏⡇⢀⠄⠘⠸⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣼⣾⣻⣬⣮⠏⠈⠌⡂⢁⠄⠣⡣⡂⠠⠐⠄⢌⠉⡛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⡀⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠁⠪⡢⠐⠄⡁⠠⠑⠷⣶⣤⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣋⣴⠂⡐⢰⡊⠠⢀⠡⠐⡭⡌⠄⠐⡀⠅⢐⠉⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠠⠁⡐⡈⢴⣀⠁⠐⡈⢀⠡⠄⣳⣤⣂⣡⠈⢛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣔⠄⠄⡀⣿⣿⣮⡄⠨⠄⠠⠁⠄⣻⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠄⢰⣤⣟⣻⣿⡀⢁⢡⣬⣐⣀⢛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣵⣤⣦⣟⣻⡟⣿⣟⣧⣔⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2021

League of Legends

Belle Delphine Christmas vid is disappointing

December 2020

Belle Delphine

May I, a woman respecting and feminist-supportive male

May I, a woman respecting and feminist-supportive male, see at least one breast from you my queen? I do not mean to come on as an improper male, and if this request disturbs you, please make me aware. You, my queen, deserve the utmost respect of any female. However, many of my gender seem to sexualize women and view them as sex toys. However, my Queen, I do not share these views. Rather, I value the female spectrum of the human race as the superior, and I, a respectful male, request for the viewing of an isolated, singular breast from your body. I await your response my Queen.
May 2021

Simps

Text-to-Speech Playing