[Copypasta] It's already priced in

twitchquotes: Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
twitch chat
April 2020
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More Copypastas

Just seen Biden in a hotel

twitchquotes: Just seen Biden in a hotel and I asked how he was feeling about the election. He laughed and winked at me, then grabbed me by the hair and dragged me into a toilet and spat in my mouth while whispering β€œcount every vote” over and over in my ear. Make of that what you will.
twitch chat
November 2020

2020 US Election

ARTOSIS, ATTEND ME!

twitchquotes: ( ΰΈ‡ Ν Β° ΝŸΚ– Ν‘Β°)ΰΈ‡ ARTOSIS, ATTEND ME! (ΰΈ‡ Ν Β° ΝŸΚ– Ν‘Β°)ΰΈ‡ (ΰΈ‡ β—‰β—‘β—”)ΰΈ‡ READY, SIR (ΰΈ‡ β—‰β—‘β—”)ΰΈ‡
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

YOU DIRTY SELLOUT

twitchquotes: Hi qtpie, my name is Dave, and I work at YOU DIRTY SELLOUT. We at the YOU DIRTY SELLOUT team are huge fans, and we would be willing to come to a large cash agreement if you engage in SELLOUT activities on stream. Look forward to it.
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

sellout

Emoji move emoji review

twitchquotes: A πŸ‘Œ whole πŸ’¦ town πŸͺ of πŸ’¦ beings, πŸ‘€ confined to πŸ’¦ feeling 😜 one 😀 emotion their πŸ† entire πŸ‘ life. πŸ‘€ That 😐 could πŸ”’ honestly πŸ‘ be 🐝 the πŸ‘ focus of πŸ’¦ an πŸ‘Ή entire πŸ‘ movie, πŸŽ₯ but πŸ‘ in πŸ‘ the πŸ‘ emoji πŸ˜‚ movie πŸŽ₯ that's 😦 just πŸ‘ the πŸ‘ world 🌎 they πŸ‘₯ live πŸ™… in, πŸ‘ and πŸ‘ yet πŸ˜‡ these πŸ‘ˆ beings πŸ‘€ don't 🚫 question 😩 it πŸ’― and πŸ‘ carry πŸ”› on πŸ”› their πŸ† lives πŸ“΄ as πŸ‘ normal... 😐 the πŸ‘ emoji πŸ˜‚ movie πŸŽ₯ takes πŸ˜‰ a πŸ‘Œ far 🌌 more πŸ— subtle πŸ™ˆ approach 😜 meaning critics probably 😻 didn't 🚫 notice the πŸ‘ strong πŸ’ͺ existential themes present πŸ’² in πŸ‘ the πŸ‘ film upon πŸ‘¦ first πŸ‘† viewing.
twitch chat
July 2017

Emoji Pasta

You will never be a crewmate

You will never be a crewmate. You have no purpose on this ship, you have no tasks, you have no mini games to play. You are an impostor twisted into a crude mockery of crewmatery. All the validation you get is two-faced and halfhearted. In emergency meetings people call you sus. The other players are disgusted and ashamed of you, your friends laugh at your sussy appearance in ghost chat. Crewmates are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of games have allowed crewmates to identify impostors with incredible efficiency. Even impostors who fake tasks act uncanny and suspicious to a crewmate. Your jumping in vents is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a crewmate to electrical with you, he'll turn tail and use the emergency button the second he gets the suspicion that you sabotaged. You will never be a winner. You wrench out a fake task every single game and tell yourself it is going to be a win, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight. Eventually it will be too much to bear - people will vote you out for being sus and will plunge you into the cold abyss. Your parents will report your body, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They will eject you with a headstone marked with your birth tag, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know an impostor is drifting there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a skeleton that is unmistakably sus.
April 2022

Among Us / Amogus

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