[Copypasta] It's already priced in

twitchquotes: Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
twitch chat
April 2020
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

I am not a viewbot. I am a normal chatter in Kripp's chat

twitchquotes: MrDestructoid I am not a viewbot. I am a normal chatter in Kripp's chat. This is not suspicious at all. Great play Kripp! You're the best! MrDestructoid
twitch chat
September 2015
Kripp

Viewbots

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi. I'm a 27 year old Japanese Japamerican (western culture fan for you foreigners). I brand and wrangle cattle on my ranch, and spend my days perfecting the craft and enjoying superior American passtimes. (Barbeque, Rodeo, Fireworks) I train with my branding iron every day, this superior weapon can permanently leave my ranch embled on a cattle's hide because it is white-hot, and is vastly superior to any other method of livestock marking. I earned my branding license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day. I speak English fluently, both Texas and Oklahoma dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about American history and their cowboy code, which I follow 100% When I get my American visa, I am moving to Dallas to work in an oil field to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a cattle wrangler for the Double Cross Ranch or an oil rig operator for Exxon-Mobil! I own several cowboy hats, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I rebel against my elders and seniors and speak English as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond. Wish me luck in America!
July 2019

Pikachu

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–„β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–Œβ–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
November 2014

Pokemon

Horrible attack on my privacy

twitchquotes: Dear Mr Morosan, I was unaware of the fact that upon subscribing to your channel full of top notch casual gameplay, my personal rights would be violated. I did not ask to be "fisted". I hereby demand a public apology and a stack of OJ cartons as compensation for the psychological scars this horrible attack on my privacy has caused.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp reluctantly crawls into bed

twitchquotes: Kripp reluctantly crawls into bed where a breathless Hafu is waiting. She takes hold of his hand and whispers, "It's ok, I broke up with Jake." He squeezes her hand, let's go, squeezes again, "You're the best female arena player...," Kripp says dejectedly, "But I made a vow to Rania to never love another woman." Hafu runs her hands lovingly down his cheek, "You're not cheating," she whispers, "I'm really Amaz."
twitch chat
September 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing