[Copypasta] It's already priced in

twitchquotes: Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
twitch chat
April 2020
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More Copypastas

Doublelift isn't so great? Are you kidding me?

twitchquotes: Doublelift isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a player with such an ability and movement with Vayne? Doublelift puts the game on another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a player with his skill and passion for the game again. Faker breaks records. Sneaky breaks records. Doublelift breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic. And his haircut.
twitch chat
December 2016
Doublelift

Classic

League of Legends

"Only 200 Gems, are you kidding me?!"

twitchquotes: "Only 200 Gems, are you kidding me?!" screams Kripp at the struggling mobile game dev who's game he is being sponsored to play. "How am I supposed to hit rank 1 without a massive head-start over everyone else!? I have to be able to brag to my chat about being #1 in every game I play!" The developer, scared, gives in to his demands. Business as usual for the Kripp.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

sellout

No, fellow Twitch chat community member, I will NOT press 1

twitchquotes: No, fellow Twitch chat community member, I will NOT press 1, spam Kаppa, hold my donger, aggravate mods, or copy paste your messages. This is a community of upstanding individuals, such as myself, who wish to keep this chat in a state of peace and clarity.
twitch chat
February 2016
Reynad

Leper gnome into the Twisted Nether

twitchquotes: "Yᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴇᴄᴋ ɪs ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ.” Fᴏʀsᴇɴ sᴀɪᴅ, ᴀs ʜᴇ sʟɪᴘᴘᴇᴅ ʜɪs ғᴇᴍɪɴɪɴᴇ ʜᴀɴᴅ ɪɴᴛᴏ Tʀᴜᴍᴘs’s ᴘᴀɴᴛs ᴀɴᴅ sᴍɪʀᴋᴇᴅ. “Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʀʏɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴛᴏᴘ-ᴅᴇᴄᴋ ᴍᴇ?” ᴘʀᴏᴛᴇsᴛs Tʀᴜᴍᴘ, ᴀs Fᴏʀsᴇɴ ʙʟᴜsʜᴇs, ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴏʏɪsʜ ғɪɢᴜʀᴇ ᴜɴᴅʀᴇssᴇᴅ ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ Tʀᴜᴍᴘ. “Wᴇᴀᴋ ᴛᴇᴍᴘᴏ ᴘʟᴀʏ, Fᴏʀsᴇɴ.” Tʜᴇ ᴛᴡᴏ ᴋɪssᴇᴅ, ᴅᴇᴇᴘʟʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀssɪᴏɴᴀᴛᴇʟʏ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴀғᴛᴇʀᴡᴀʀᴅs Fᴏʀsᴇɴ ᴘʟᴀᴄᴇs ʜɪs ʟᴇᴘᴇʀ ɢɴᴏᴍᴇ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴛʀᴜᴍᴘs's ᴛᴡɪsᴛᴇᴅ ɴᴇᴛʜᴇʀ
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

you can't chat. Its not a chat.

twitchquotes: Relatively new to twitch and I am confounded by twitch chat. It is just full of spam emojis. You can't ask questions, you can't have conversations, nothing. It all scrolls away so quickly to stupid face pics posted 15 times in a row.Its not really a chat. Chat involves atleast two people speaking to each other. This is just everyone spamming face emojis over and over again.What is the point of spamming the face emojis? It completely ruins chat; you can't chat. Its not a chat.
twitch chat
February 2019

I hate Twitch Chat

Text-to-Speech Playing