[Copypasta] It's already priced in

twitchquotes: Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
twitch chat
April 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Lying about service dogs

I work in a restaurant. We only allow dogs in if they are service dogs. If anyone comes in with any dog I ask; ‘Is it a service dog?’ With a big wink to give them the opportunity to lie to me making it obvious I want them to. If at first they say ‘no’ I reply with ‘are you sure? This dog here? Sure looks like a service dog to me. Are you sure this is not a service dog?’with another big wink Always works. I love dogs
July 2021

Hey guys Papparian here!

twitchquotes: Hey guys Papparian here! I wanted to check in and make sure my Little Kripp baby is acting like a nice little boy. He has been known to cry from time to time about RNG so please make sure you spam BabyRage NEVER LUCKY BabyRage when he loses RNG, to keep his little baby butt in check. Thanks, no copy pasterino.
twitch chat
September 2015
Kripp

salty

neverlucky

Mr I'm too dank to call or write my fans

twitchquotes: dear mr im too dank to call or write my fans. this is the last meme ill ever send your ass. its been 6 months and still no accept. i dont deserve it? i know you got my last two friend requests i wrote the memes on em perfect. i love you cutie, we culdve been together think about it
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

Duck

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⣩⣭⣶⣶⣮⣭⡙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡙⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡃⠄⠹⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡌⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠐⣠⡶⣶⣲⡎⢻⣿⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿ ⣿⠟⣋⡥⡶⣞⡯⣟⣾⣺⢽⡧⣥⣭⣉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⢻⣿ ⡃⣾⢯⢿⢽⣫⡯⣷⣳⢯⡯⠯⠷⠻⠞⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡌⣿ ⣦⣍⡙⠫⠛⠕⣋⡓⠭⣡⢶⠗⣡⣶⡝⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⢹ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣘⣛⣋⣡⣵⣾⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸
December 2019

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my übernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
August 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing