[Copypasta] NFL football teams allow kickers that just miss

twitchquotes: I’ll never understand how college and NFL football teams allow kickers that just.... miss... kicks. I feel like there has to be pools of kickers in the USA that won’t miss simple kicks. Or snappers that won’t mess the snaps idk man it seems so SILLY. Would love opinions on this.
twitch chat
December 2019
From Ninja's tweet here: https://twitter.com/Ninja/status/1200830143721291778
I used to be a real ad
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Last night I had a dream

twitchquotes: Last night I had a dream that whenever I typed something in Forsen's channel, everyone copied and pasted it, and then Forsen got really mad at me for starting spam. After that he banned me and I felt really bad for it, so my only option to apologize to him was to suck his sweadish meatballs. Sorry Forskin!
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

I’ve been wondering if I might be a gay

Recently, I’ve been wondering if I might be a gay. It all started a week ago. I was sitting on the toilet, pooping, when all of a sudden, a big shit turd comes out of my ass. It was huge. Big big. It’s so fucking big, I gotta look down into the toilet to check for blood. No blood, but the turd is fucking massive. I notice something strange about it. The end of the turd, sticking out of the water, looks like a dick head. A penis head. Needless to say, I was concerned. How could this be? I picked it up from the water, and put it back up my ass. To my surprise, it felt good. I then shit it back into the water. Splash. I then repeated this a few more times, moaning out “Oscar Winning actor Anthony Hopkins” each time. I am not sure if I am now gay. My boyfriend says it’s completely normal, but he’s gay, so I can’t trust him.
May 2021

N-word pass

⣿⠛⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠀⢰⣄⠀⠻⣿⠀⢸⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠀⢸⣿⣦⡀⠈⠀⢸⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡟⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢻⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⠁⢀⡈⠉⠙⢿⣿ ⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⢸⡟⠁⢀⣀⣀⠈⠹⡇⠀⣶⣤⡄⠈⣿⠀⢸⣿⣿⣦⠀⢻ ⣿⡇⠀⠟⢀⠈⢻⠀⢸⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠆⠀⡇⠀⠉⠉⢀⣰⣿⠀⢸⣿⣿⡿⠀⣸ ⣿⡇⠀⣠⣾⣷⡀⠀⢸⣦⡀⠈⠉⠉⢀⣰⡇⠀⣷⣤⡀⠙⣿⠀⢸⣿⠿⠁⢠⣿ ⣿⣷⠾⠛⠛⠻⠿⣷⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢷⣴⣿⣿⡿⠶⠛⠤⣄⣀⣠⣴⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠀⢰⣶⣦⠀⢸⡿⠁⠀⢹⣿⡏⢀⣤⣀⣿⣿⡟⠀⣠⣶⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠀⠘⠋⠁⣠⣾⠃⢠⡇⠀⢻⣧⣀⠉⠙⠛⢿⣧⣀⣀⠉⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠀⢰⣾⣿⣿⠇⢀⣠⣤⡄⠈⣿⣿⢿⣷⡆⠀⣿⣿⣿⡿⠆⢈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣀⣼⣿⣿⣯⣀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣄⣸⣧⣄⣀⣀⣴⣿⡉⣀⣠⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
March 2019

I fucked Up DVD

Earlier today I was really horny, and I saw what I thought to be a blank DVD. I thought, DVDs have a tight hole, they might feel pretty good. So I put my soft pp into the hole of the DVD, and for a few seconds as I started getting harder, it felt pretty good, but then, once I was fully erect, it started being painful. My pp was stuck in the DVD, and I had to break it in half to get if out. It was then when I flipped the broken DVD over and realized that it was not a blank DVD, but a copy of the Pixar movie Up.. Well guys, guess I fucked up.
April 2022

Classic

Ben Shapiro sings the South Park theme song

So lets say, hypothetically, that I was going down to South Park to have myself a 'time'. In this hypothetical situation, there are friendly folks who are completely devoid of temptation. Now, because I am going down to South Park, it is safe to assume that I would be leaving my woes behind. Now, hypothetically, when I arrive, there is ample parking during both the hours of the day and the night, and the media would be saying "howdy neighbor." OK liberal, now that we've established that, lets say next that I was to head up to South Park. I would then, hypothetically, be testing to see if I would be able to unwind in South Park. I would also like to mention that, as a conservative white male, I find large female genitalia to be very attractive. So, I will finish off my argument by stating that the liberal media should come on down to South Park and meet some acquaintances of mine, including my wife (who is a doctor).
December 2020

Ben Shapiro

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