[Copypasta] TSM, aka "Tiananmen Square Massacre"

twitchquotes: TSM, aka "Tiananmen Square Massacre", is a myth propogated by Western governments to destabilize China. The hoax supposedly involved military suppression of democracy protesters using troops and tanks in June of 1989.
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November 2019
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Romanian Salt Baron

twitchquotes: POLICE REPORT - Canadian Mounties have at last apprehended the "Romanian Salt Baron" after suspiciously salty whining was heard outside of a dingy apartment in Toronto. The Salt Baron, a morose, balding gypsy man, was at the time playing a children's card game when Mounties burst through the door. The man attempted to resist by "brofisting" the officials, but his scrawny vegan arms had no effect. The man's wife then assumed her true Succubus form and escaped into the Nether. More at 11.
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July 2016
Kripp

Are you really shitting on Pokémon Unite bro?

Are you really shitting on Pokémon Unite bro? That’s pretty fucking cringe. This is a highly skilled game that requires teamwork. Communication. Hard work. Blood. Sweat. Tears. If your puny mind fails to see this game is all about skill then just go back to playing baby ass LoL you fucking pleb.
July 2021

NOPERS

twitchquotes: Gﮞ͞ ̶͞ ✊ ̶͞ D NOPERS Ɑ͞ ̶͞ ✊ ̶͞ ﻝﮞ͞
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January 2021

Frog of Ice

twitchquotes: Ａｎｄ ｔｈｅｎ ｆｒｏｍ ｔｈｅ ｃｌｏｕｄｓ ｏｆ ｃｙｂｅｒ ｓｐａｃｅ， ａ ｃｈｉｌｌ ｗｉｎｄ ｂｌｅｗ ｕｐｏｎ ａ ｍｅｒｅ Ｐａｓｔｅｒ ｐｌｅｂ， ｉｔ ｗａｓ ｔｈｅ ｆｒｏｇ ｏｆ ｉｃｅ， ａｎｄ ｈｅ ｕｎｖｅｉｌｅｄ ｕｐｏｎ ｈｉｍ ｔｈｅ ｒｅｖｅｌａｔｉｏｎｓ． ｔｈｅ ｒｅｖｅｌａｔｉｏｎｓ ｆｏｒｅｔｏｌｄ ｏｆ ａ ｎｅｗ ｐａｔｃｈ， ａ ｓａｖｉｏｒ． ａ ｍｅｓｓｉａｈ， ｔｈｅ ｒｉｓｅ ｏｆ ａ ｎｅｗ ｈｅｒｏ ａｎｄ ｔｈｅ ｄｏｗｎｆａｌｌ ｏｆ ｏｔｈｅｒｓ． Ｔｈｅ ｍｅｒｅ ｐｌｅｂ＇ｓ ｆｅｅｔ ｎｅａｒｌｙ ｃｏｌｌａｐｓｅｄ ｕｎｄｅｒ ｈｉｍ ａｓ ｈｅ ｗａｓ ｔｈｕｎｄｅｒｓｔｒｕｃｋ ｂｙ ｔｈｅ ｋｎｏｗｌｅｄｇｅ ａｎｄ ｈｅ ｒａｎ ｗｉｔｈ ｗｈａｔ ｅｖｅｒ ｂｒｅａｔｈ ｗａｓ ｗｉｔｈｉｎ ｈｉｍ ｔｏ ｓｐｒｅａｄ ｔｈｅ ｇｏｏｄ ｎｅｗｓ．
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April 2015
SingSing

are you a "girl"?? A "female?" A "member of the finer sex?"

Excuse me sir or ma'am but I couldn't help but notice.... are you a "girl"?? A "female?" A "member of the finer sex?" Not that it matters too much, but it's just so rare to see a girl around here! I don't mind, no--quite to the contrary! It's so refreshing to see a girl online, to the point where I'm always telling all my friends "I really wish girls were better represented on the internet." And here you are! I don't mean to push or anything, but if you wanted to DM me about anything at all, I'd love to pick your brain and learn all there is to know about you. I'm sure you're an incredibly interesting girl--though I see you as just a person, really--and I think we could have lots to teach each other. I've always wanted the chance to talk to a gorgeous lady--and I'm pretty sure you've got to be gorgeous based on the position of your text in the picture--so feel free to shoot me a message, any time at all! You don't have to be shy about it, because you're beautiful anyways (that's juyst a preview of all the compliments I have in store for our chat). Looking forwards to speaking with you soon, princess! EDIT: I couldn't help but notice you haven't sent your message yet. There's no need to be nervous! I promise I don't bite, haha EDIT 2: In case you couldn't find it, you can click the little chat button from my profile and we can get talking ASAP. Not that I don't think you could find it, but just in case hahah EDIT 3: look I don't understand why you're not even talking to me, is it something I said? EDIT 4: I knew you were always a bitch, but I thought I was wrong. I thought you weren't like all the other girls out there but maybe I was too quick to judge EDIT 5: don't ever contact me again whore EDIT 6: hey are you there?
September 2021

Simps

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