[Copypasta] Own a musket for home defense

twitchquotes: Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
twitch chat
August 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Full of acknowledgment of the farce he has become

twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Cum

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June 2021

We have you surrounded now Dansgame-kun

twitchquotes: AYAYA AYAYA ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ AYAYA DansGame AYAYA ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ AYAYA AYAYA We have you surrounded now Dansgame-kun !!
twitch chat
July 2019

Weebs

GIFF 2GD

twitchquotes: つ ◕_◕ ༽つ GIFF 2GD つ ◕_◕ ༽つつ ◕_◕ ༽つ GIFF 2GD つ ◕_◕ ༽つつ ◕_◕ ༽つ GIFF 2GD つ ◕_◕ ༽つつ ◕_◕ ༽つ GIFF 2GD つ ◕_◕ ༽つつ ◕_◕ ༽つ GIFF 2GD つ ◕_◕ ༽つつ ◕_◕ ༽つ GIFF 2GD つ ◕_◕ ༽つ
twitch chat
February 2016
Dota Major

Dota 2

Spooky story

twitchquotes: One day there was Man. He wake up in night time like 3 or 4 am in the morning, Much sweat from nightmare of skeletons!! He turns on his computer and waited for the screen to load. "I will watch Kripparrian to calm my fears" he Mumbled. As he click the URL the stream loads... but there is only skeletons... Plz no creepy pasta this spooky story
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing