[Copypasta] Own a musket for home defense

twitchquotes: Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
twitch chat
August 2019
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More Copypastas

Gray Screen Simulator for Windows

twitchquotes: Hey Tyler, I was just curious if this was the new Gray Screen Simulator for Windows and Windows devices? I've been seeing a lot of good reviews and was curious about picking it up. Thanks for the advice, buddy!
twitch chat
November 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

"Soul" in any sense, metaphorical, spiritual or religious, does not exist

"Soul" in any sense, metaphorical, spiritual or religious, does not exist. What simpletons experience, specifically in the sense of a game having a "soul" is a feeling of comfort, enjoyment and fulfillment (among other positive feelings). Those simpletons, usually rarely experience such feeling, especially outside of gaming, and cannot comprehend that non simpletons can find positive feelings and emotion in many games (as well outside of gaming). You're a prime example of such creature, and the most fascinating part is you do not even understand or comprehend how wasted and useless your mind is. Truly a wonder to behold and a warning for all parents.
June 2021

forsenStein

⡄⢿⣿⣿⠏⣼⣿⡇⣴⣿⡆⣿⢰⣿⢀⣾⡇⢀⣿⣿⠄⣠⣿⠄⣼⢟⣴⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣦⣛⡫⠾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⣴⣿⣿⣼⢯⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁ ⠟⠟⡠⢤⣀⡀⠘⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢇⡀ ⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣌⣱⢦⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣹⠿⠿⣫⣿⠁ ⣤⣤⣸⢟⣉⡙⢻⠦⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣯⣶⣆⣀⣠⣤⣄⣀⣈⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣴ ⣿⣿⣬⡿⢦⣤⠿⡛⢤⠄⣿⣿⣣⣼⡿⠟⢁⡀⡀⠄⠉⠛⠿⠿⡆⣦⣽⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⢉⣰⡟⣸⣿⢡⣯⣍⣉⢭⣍⡳⠤⠴⢆⣤⢀⣿⡭⠍⠟⡫⢙⡿ ⣿⣿⣿⣥⣤⣾⣿⢏⣴⣿⣿⡎⣯⣽⣭⣻⣦⣩⣈⠭⠿⢻⠯⣊⣴⠭⣵⣿⣶⣶ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣫⠸⠿⣿⠏⣈⣭⣹⣯⣷⣟⣻⡽⣿⣾⣽⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⣼⠟⠋⠁⠒⠻⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⢺⡹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⣛⣥⠄⠒⣒⣒⣒⠓⠒⠚⣻⣟⠲⣤⠄⢹⣮⣙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣝⡳⢭⡭⢿⣽⠛⠙⠧⢭⣤⡤⢽⣦⣿⣿⣷⡝⠛⠛⠉⠄⣰⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⡿⣿⣿⣶⡍⠉⠋⠛⣛⣛⣛⣭⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣣⠄⢠⣶⣾⣿⡟ ⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠉⠙⣛⣯⣾⣿⣶⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄ ⣿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡋⠉⠄⠄⠘⢿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

People space jammed from the oldest of times

twitchquotes: From the oldest of times, people jammed for a number of reasons. They jammed in prayer... or so that their crops would be plentiful... or so their hunt would be good. And they Jammed to stay physically fit... and show their community spirit. And they Jammed to celebrate." And that is the Jamming we're talking about. Aren't we told in Psalm 149 "Praise ye the Lord Octavian. Slam Jam unto the Lord Octavian a new song. Let them praise His name in the Space Jam"? And it was King David - King David, who we read about in Samuel - and what did David do? What did David do? He jammed
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp

i have not been gifted a single sub

twitchquotes: Hey streamer, i just wanted to express my disappointment in your community with this message. I have been a active viewer for the past couple of years and despite my constant effort i have not been gifted a single sub by your community. You should really be ashamed.
twitch chat
February 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing