[Copypasta] Own a musket for home defense

twitchquotes: Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
twitch chat
August 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
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SO MALD

⢰⡟⠛⠂⢠⡾⠛⠻⣶⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⡄⠀⣰⢿⡇⠀⢰⣿⣇⠀⢰⣿⠀⠀⢸⡟⠛⢶⡄ ⠘⠻⣶⡄⢸⡇⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⣿⡏⣷⢠⡟⢸⡇⠀⣾⣁⣿⡄⢸⣿⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⢸⡇ ⢠⣤⣼⠏⠘⢷⣤⣴⠿⠀⠀⠀⢿⡇⢸⣿⠁⢸⡇⣸⠏⠉⠹⣷⠸⣿⣤ ⢸⣧⣤⡾
July 2019

Can I mod your chat?

twitchquotes: Can I mod your chat? I graduated top of my class in the US Navy kappa’s, I’ve been involved in numerous raids on Kripparrian’s chat with over 300 confirmed bans. I’m trained in copy pasta warfare and I’m the top mod on Twitch.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

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May 2021

NSFW

Summon The Hydra

Puppy

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January 2024

Trolling my whole class with Among Us Part 2

So yesterday at lunch, I was about to eat with my friends from band when I realized that there was an empty seat at a table with some of the popular kids. I decided to take advantage of this opportunity to troll them, and perhaps befriend some of them. I sat at their table, and right as I sat down, I noticed that one of the kids (who happened to be black) was sitting above a vent. I yelled "Black is sus! He's on top of a vent!!" Everyone at the table looked up at me, but no one laughed (they probably didn't get the reference). I decided that I would try to get them to be familiar with it, so I asked "Do to guys wanna play some Among Us???" They were all dead silent (honestly they just didn't know how fun of a game it was). I slapped the middle of our table (to mimick the "emergency meeting" feature in Among Us), and I screamed "EMERGENCY MEETING!!!" Again, none of them laughed. One of them looked at me and said "Can you please sit somewhere else?" At this point, I realized that I had to make them laugh quickly, or I would blow my chance with them. I made the widest grin I could possibly make (Trying to mimick the "When the imposter is sus" meme) and I said "When the impoter is sus". I then tried to make a face that resembled the "Flushed" emoji (as part of the meme). However, I don't think any of them understood the reference. I then pulled up the among us theme song on Youtube and played it on full blast. At this point, everyone at my table was asking for me to leave, and their friend came back, who regularly sat in the chair I was sitting in. I went back to sit with my friends from band. However, I will forever remember the time I trolled ALL of the popular kids in my grade.
March 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

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