[Copypasta] Pepega SUSHI SUSHI

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How to deal with unsportsmanlike player at chess club?

Theres a very unsportsmanlike player at our club who constantly taunts and belittles everyone else. Whenver you make a mistake he yells out "blunder!" or "inaccuracy!" ... "better move was..." and then says the engine move or what he thinks the engine move is. He also says what he thinks the engine +- is. He plays the kings gambit as much as he can and knows like 30 moves deep into every variation. If you respond something other than e5 to 1.e4 he just laughs and calls you a patzer. He's also OBSESSED with Hikaru Nakamura. He talks about him all the time and shows everyone a picture of him with Hikaru (Its really blurry so its hard to tell if its even him). He's constantly talking about him as if he's a close friend even though he only (maybe?) met him one time. Its bordering on creepy and makes everyone uncomfortable. He calls him "Hikaru-San" which I think is part of his obsession with Japanese culture. He also brings japanese noodles/Ramen to the club every day and will spend like 5-10 minute eating them during his turn just to taunt you. Meanwhile he will be mumbling words in japanese. We tried approaching about his conduct but he just did some weird anime villain laugh, yelled something in Japanese, then ran off to challenge another person to a blitz match. We obviously don't want to tell him not to come but it feels like his presence is deterring new people from joining and its also exhuasting.
February 2022

Chess

I orgasmed during an online zoom class

Fuck this is so embarrassing. I'm literally shaking so hard rn. So like the randy horny mf I am, I was jerking off and edging myself before one of my online classes. Then the class started so I joined. Our teacher's pretty strict and all and expects cameras on at all times. So I just sat there whilst everyone joined, still horny as hell. I had my dick pressed between my legs still. Teacher's going round asking us how the weekend went yada yada. So now it's my turn to speak. I unmute my mic to say my stuff and whilst I'm talking I squeeze my legs a little too hard and come hard as fuck causing to me to literally moan LIKE A FUCKING WHALE and make my horrid contorted orgasm face RIGHT ON FUCKING CAMERA WITH MY MIC UNMUTED WHILST THE ENTIRE CLASS OF 40 STUDENTS ARE WATCHING. LET'S NOT EVEN FORGET THAT MY FACE WAS FULL-SCREEN WHILST I WAS SPEAKING. In a total crazy panic, I leave the class. I'm dropping that class asap. No, scratch that. Dropping out of college altogether. No way can I go back there again. Might as well drop off this earth while I'm at it.
September 2021

HeyGuys

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣶⣾⣿⣶⣦⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠻⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣅⣀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣹⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢽⠟⠁⠰⠿⠻⢾⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⠒⡌⠱⣀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣴⠊⠀⣤⡀⣼⣶⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⡇⠀⠀⠃⠀⠀ ⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠙⠉⠉⠁⠝⢹⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⠀⠃⠀⠀⢰⢠⢢ ⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣀⠈⠒⠒⢡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠈⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠆⠸ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠉⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡆ ⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⠀ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠁⠀ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠃⠃⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀
September 2020

Priorities yo

twitchquotes: Kripp you obviously don't understand it's viewers that bring you money, and your job is to entertain them. Playing deathwing will decrease your chance to win by 1% but get all the viewers happy. Priorities yo.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old"

twitchquotes: Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old," when I would NEVER call him "short and fat?" Oh well, I try so hard to be his friend - and maybe someday that will happen!
twitch chat
November 2017
Text-to-Speech Playing