[Copypasta] I am... the Kripp

twitchquotes: My name is Octavian Morosan, and I am the saltiest man alive. To the outside world, I'm an ordinary vegan, but secretly, with the help of my friends at P.E.T.A. Labs, I play childrens card games and find other babies like me. I BM'd the man who killed my mother, but in doing so, I opened up our world to new threats. And I am the only one salty enough to complain about going second. them. I am... The Kripp!
twitch chat
February 2017
Kripp
Variation of The Flash's opening quote: "My name is Barry Allen, and I am the fastest man alive. To the outside world, I'm an ordinary forensic scientist, but secretly, with the help of my friends at S.T.A.R. Labs, I fight crime and find other meta-humans like me. I hunted the man who killed my mother, but in doing so, I opened up our world to new threats. And I am the only one fast enough to stop them. I am... The Flash!"
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Kripp Copypastas

Six foot antlers

twitchquotes: I bet all you beta f*gs don't wear antlers either. Science has shown that the male deers with the largest antlers attract the most females, so obviously the exact same principle works for human females. When I walk into the club reeking of sweat with six foot antlers strapped to my head, I get the attention of every female in the room. Pretty much ever man too, that's how powerful the effect is.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

Real hardcore gamers play at least 4 games at a time

twitchquotes: ２ ｇａｍｅｓ ａｔ ｔｈｅ ｓａｍｅ ｔｉｍｅ？ ｆｉｌｔｈｙ ｃａｓｕａｌ． ｒｅａｌ ｈａｒｄｃｏｒｅ ｇａｍｅｒｓ ｐｌａｙ ａｔ ｌｅａｓｔ ４ ｇａｍｅｓ ｗｉｔｈ ｏｎｅ ｈａｎｄ ｔｉｅｄ ｂｅｈｉｎｄ ｔｈｅｉｒ ｂａｃｋ． ｓｅｒｉｏｕｓｌｙ ｋｒｉｐｐ， ｉｆ ｙｏｕ ｗａｎｔ ｔｏ ｋｅｅｐ ｙｏｕｒ ｖｉｅｗｅｒｓ ｙｏｕ ｂｅｔｔｅｒ ｓｔｅｐ ｉｔ ｕｐ． ｓｉｎｃｅｒｅｌｙ， ａ ｓｏｏｎ ｔｏ ｂｅ ｅｘ－ｋｒｉｐｐｌｅｔ
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Subscribers pay for our entertainment

twitchquotes: ᕕ༼ •́ ヮ •̀ ༽凸 Hey SUBS, YOU PAY FOR OUR ENTERTAINMENT Kappa ᕕ༼ •́ ヮ •̀ ༽凸!!!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

plebs vs subs

HOLD THE LINE

twitchquotes: HOLD THE LINE EVERYONE 🏥 WutFace _ 🔪
twitch chat
March 2016
Kripp

Show us THE decks

twitchquotes: Enough with the bullshit Kripp. We all know you've hid away the best decks for this expansion to be showing off to the ladies, and we in chat find that really weird. All we want is to watch you win, and yet you play some bullshit hunter for some bullshit reason and all you do is lose. Show us the decks Kripp. Show us THE decks.
twitch chat
December 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

More Kripp Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing