[Copypasta] not an asexual thing

twitchquotes: ‘not an asexual thing’. try living a day in my shoes, walking around terrified of encountering sex everywhere i go. wherever i look, parents with children, people sucking each others’ faces. it makes me and millions of other aces out there feel really attacked.
twitch chat
February 2019

Classic

Tweet: https://twitter.com/breathinbuckyy/status/1091762452524662789
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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bbz will u luv me 4evr

gurl was walkin2 skewl wit her bf n they were crossin da rode. she sed "bbz will u luv me 4evr" he said "NO.." ... da gurl cryed N ran across da rode b4 da green man came on the sine. boy was cryin and went to pic up her body. she was ded. he whispered 2 her corpse "I ment 2 sey i will luv u FIVE-ever..." (dat mean he luv her moar den 4evr) xxx~*...LIKE DIS IF U CRY EVRY TIME...~*xxx
March 2021

Classic

KEKW

⢰⣶⠶⢶⣶⣶⡶⢶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⡶⠶⢶⣶⣶⣶⣶ ⠘⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠄⠄⣹⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿ ⠄⠤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡈⠙⠛⣿⣿⣿⣧⣀⠠⣤⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶ ⢠⠄⠄⣀⣀⣀⣭⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣿⣿⠉⠉⠉⢉⣉⡉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛ ⢸⣿⡀⠄⠈⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⢩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⣠⣴⣿⣷⣭⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠸⠿⣿⣿⣿⠋⣴⡟⠋⠈⠻⠿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠃⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⡁⠈⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣤⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠈⠻⠿⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠒⠒⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⢿⣦⣄⣠⣄⠛⠟⠃⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⢀⣰⣦⣼⣿⣿⡿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⣿⠄⢰⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢛⣥⣾⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠈⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣧⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
September 2019

Classic

Why is six afraid of seven? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam

Why is six afraid of seven? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. He can seldom close his eyes without opening them again at fear of Charlies lurking in the jungle trees. Not that you could ever see the bastards, mind you. They were swift, and they knew their way around the jungle like nothing else. He remembers the looks on the boys' faces as he walked into that village and... oh, Jesus. The memories seldom left him, either. Sometimes he'd reminisce - even hear - Tex's southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes like nothing else. He always kept a pack of Lucky's with him. The boys are gone, now. He knows that; it's just that he forgets, sometimes. And, every now and then, the way that seven looks at him with avid concern in his eyes... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. Makes him feel like he's back there... in the jungle.
August 2021

Classic

Attention all Fortnite gamers

twitchquotes: Attention all Fortnite gamers: John Wick is in great danger and he needs your help to wipe out the squads in the Tilted Towers, but to do this he needs a golden scar and a couple of chug jugs. To help him, all he needs is your credit card number, the three digits on the back, and the expiration month and year. But, you gotta be quick, so John Wick can secure the bag and achieve the epic Victory Royal!
twitch chat
November 2018

Classic

Fortnite

Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)

I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
January 2021

Classic

WallStreetBets

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