twitchquotes:
THATS THE WRONG HOLE ONII-CHAN KYAAAAH
THATS THE WRONG HOLE ONII-CHAN KYAAAAH
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(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Classic Copypastas
KRUSTY KRAB IS UNFAIR
twitchquotes:
KRUSTY KRAB IS UNFAIR! MR. KRABS IS IN THERE! STANDING AT THE CONCESSION! PLOTTING HIS OPPRESSION!
KRUSTY KRAB IS UNFAIR! MR. KRABS IS IN THERE! STANDING AT THE CONCESSION! PLOTTING HIS OPPRESSION!
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Classic
Why is six afraid of seven? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam
Why is six afraid of seven?
Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. He can seldom close his eyes without opening them again at fear of Charlies lurking in the jungle trees. Not that you could ever see the bastards, mind you. They were swift, and they knew their way around the jungle like nothing else. He remembers the looks on the boys' faces as he walked into that village and... oh, Jesus. The memories seldom left him, either. Sometimes he'd reminisce - even hear - Tex's southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes like nothing else. He always kept a pack of Lucky's with him. The boys are gone, now. He knows that; it's just that he forgets, sometimes. And, every now and then, the way that seven looks at him with avid concern in his eyes... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. Makes him feel like he's back there... in the jungle.
Classic
I dream of becoming a carrot
twitchquotes:
I dream of becoming a carrot. When I'm home alone I dig holes in the backyard and stand in them, put lettuce on top of my head from sun up to sun down. I would steal sun tan spray from stores and use it until I turned a bright orange. People tell me it's impossible for me to be a carrot but I know I can be anything I want to be.
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Classic
Natalie Portman is the reason I work out
Natalie Portman is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at the Vanity Fair Oscars party bar. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do. I say I loved her in New Girl. She laughs. I get my drink.
"Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got her attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Natalie Portman? She touches her neck as she watches me leave.
Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette.
"Got a spare?" she asks.
"What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles.
"Conversation with me, duh."
I laugh.
"What's so funny?" she protests.
"Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of the egos?"
"You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter.
"What would you do if you weren't an actress?" I ask.
"Teaching, I think."
"And if I was your student, what would I be learning?"
"Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?"
"Bermuda," I say.
"Oh wow. That's lovely."
"It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking."
"What could possibly be not to your liking in Bermuda?" she inquires.
"I don't like sand," I tell her. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."
Classic
This guy's deck is CRAZY
twitchquotes:
This guy's deck is CRAZY!” ☑ “My deck can't win against a deck like that” ☑ "He NEEDED precisely those two cards to win" ☑ “He topdecked the only card that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect cards" ☑ “There was nothing I could do” ☑ “I played that perfectly”
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Kripp