[Copypasta] Let's build a ladder

twitchquotes: ╠═══╣Lets build a ladder╠═══╣
twitch chat
April 2015

Classic

Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Classic Copypastas

Rick Astley paradox

twitchquotes: If you ask Rick Astley for a DVD of the movie Up, he won’t give it to you because he’s never gonna give you Up. However, by not giving you Up like you asked for it, he’s letting you down. This is known as the Astley paradox.
twitch chat
June 2020

Classic

gachiGASM

░░░░░▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓░░░░░░░░ ░░░▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░░░░░░░ ░░▓▓▓▓▒░░▒▒▓▓▒▒▓▓▓▓░░░░░ ░▓▓▓▓▒░░▓▓▓▒▄▓░▒▄▄▄▓░░░░ ▓▓▓▓▓▒░░▒▀▀▀▀▒░▄░▄▒▓▓░░░ ▓▓▓▓▓▒░░▒▒▒▒▒▓▒▀▒▀▒▓▒▓░░ ▓▓▓▓▓▒▒░░░▒▒▒░░▄▀▀▀▄▓▒▓░ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒░░░▒▒▓▀▄▄▄▄▓▒▒▒▓ ░▓█▀▄▒▓▒▒░░░▒▒░░▀▀▀▒▒▒▒░ ░░▓█▒▒▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░░▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░ ░░░▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░░░▒▒▒▓▓░ ░░░░░▓▓▒░░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░ ░░░░░░▓▒▒░░░░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░░
April 2016

KappaPride

Classic

Bumper Ameng burger

twitchquotes: Bumper stared at the burger in his hand. Normally, he loved chowing down on his Big Mac like he chowed on these beta tanks like Swon or Muma or Super. But not today. Today, this burger was a sign of his failure. The double patties of meat reminded him not of succulent juicy beef but only the mighty veiny vascular muscles of Ameng. The seeded bread buns? It was Ameng’s cheeks as he squatted on Bumper’s face. The tomato? It was his blood dripping off Ameng’s hammer. The mayo? You know what it is
twitch chat
March 2019
OverwatchLeague

Classic

Overwatch

I miss the old Harambe

twitchquotes: I miss the old Harambe. Straight from the zoo Harambe. Eating his food Harambe. No attitude Harambe. I hate the new Harambe. Shot by a dude Harambe. The Youtube views Harambe. Up in the news Harambe. I miss the sweet Harambe. Playing with kids Harambe. I gotta say at that time I'd like to meet Harambe. See I invented Harambe. It wasnt any Harambes. And now i look and look around and there's no more Harambes.
twitch chat
September 2016

Classic

Harambe

Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)

I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
January 2021

Classic

WallStreetBets

Text-to-Speech Playing