[Copypasta] Tiffany's chandelier

twitchquotes: I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier; it's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I love the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son. And he's the Chief of Police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
twitch chat
November 2018
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Art of Conquest is the best!

twitchquotes: (sponsored viewer): Hey Kripp! I just saw your Youtube video about Art of Conquest! It looks like such an amazing free game with a lot of wonderful content and replayablility. I was wondering you were going to play Art of Conquest on stream for us tonight? It would be a privilege to watch such a skilled gamer with a positive attitude such as yourself play this mind-bogglingly complex game. Thanks Kripp, you're the best - just like Art of Conquest!
twitch chat
September 2017
Kripp

sellout

Addicted to copy pasta

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp. You got me addicted to copy pasta you sick ***. I was 19 and on my way to my dream job when you first gave me a hit of this junk. Now I'm cappucino dongeringos in back-alleys just for another copy pasta. I'm chasing that first high and I'm scared I'll rip in pepperinos soon if I don't find help. Pls no crop a dingo pace the rhino my story.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Stimulus hopes in the year is 2025

The year is 2025. House speaker Nancy pelosi's brain jar has agreed with Mitch McConnell's new human skinbody to vote on the $12 covid stimulus package. This is the 37th revision to the package initially introduced in late 2020. One dollar will be split between all americans, two between all illegal immigrants, and the rest to Jeff bezos. Due to stimulus hopes, SPY has rallied to 600.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

I screamed "dead body reported" at my aunts funeral

Me (M 9) screamed "dead body reported" at my aunts funeral. My mom said that my aunt died and that we are going to her funeral the next morning. As soon as she left the room crying I busted put laughing because it reminded me of among us a popular video game. So as we were riding in the car I was thinking about saying "dead body reported" at the funeral. When we finnaly arived I screamed "dead body reported" everyone was looking me like if some sort of a weirdo. Then I remembered that my grandfather's sister fell in the vents and died when she was 2 years old. So I said grandpa's sister sus she vented. My grandfather started crying and everyone was screaming at me instead of laughing. My mom took my x box and said that I am going to therapist tomorow. Idk my mom is acting kinda sus πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
February 2021

Among Us / Amogus

what's the Aura appeal?

twitchquotes: what's the Aura appeal? I have nothing against him personally, but I went to his stream twice and both times 12 year olds were spamming copy pastas and overlong donation messages
twitch chat
July 2020
Aurateur
Text-to-Speech Playing