[Copypasta] Tiffany's chandelier

twitchquotes: I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier; it's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I love the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son. And he's the Chief of Police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
twitch chat
November 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Or I will be forced to call the 0-3 Police

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparrian, this is Reginald. It has come to my attention that you went 0-3 in Hearthstone arena. This is completely unacceptable and detrimental to the image of Team Solo Mid. Remove any and all affiliation with TSM and "BayLife" or I will be forced to call the 0-3 Police.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

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Oops I dropped my CONGA LINE

twitchquotes: Oops I dropped my CONGA LINE ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ CONGA LINE ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ CONGA LINE ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ CONGA LINE ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ CONGA LINE ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿšถ
twitch chat
October 2015

Classic

What is left of the Kripp we all loved?

twitchquotes: ๏ผฎ๏ฝ ๏ผฐ๏ฝ๏ผฅ๏ผŒ ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝ”๏ฝ”๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ผŒ ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ ๏ผฏ๏ผช๏ผŒ ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ๏ฝ” ๏ฝŽ๏ฝŒ๏ผŽ ๏ผท๏ฝˆ๏ฝ๏ฝ” ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ‰๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ…๏ฝ†๏ฝ” ๏ฝ๏ฝ† ๏ฝ”๏ฝˆ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ‹๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ ๏ฝ—๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ๏ฝ–๏ฝ…๏ฝ„๏ผŸ ๏ผฎ๏ฝ๏ฝ— ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ๏ฝ™๏ฝ“ ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝ“๏ฝ•๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ…๏ผŒ ๏ฝ†๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ“๏ฝ•๏ฝ‚๏ฝ“๏ฝƒ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ‚๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ“๏ผŒ ๏ฝ„๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‹๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡๏ฝ ๏ฝŠ๏ฝ•๏ฝ‰๏ฝƒ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ๏ฝ™๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ†๏ฝ๏ฝ’ ๏ผด๏ผณ๏ผญ
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

DONALD TRUMP NUDES

twitchquotes: IF ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ YOU ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ SEE ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ A LINK ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ THAT ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ SAYS ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ DONALD ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ TRUMP ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ NUDES ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ DONโ€™T ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ CLICK ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ ITS ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ A ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ VIRUS ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ THAT ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ PUTS ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ AMERICAN ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ FLAGS ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ BETWEEN ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ EVERY ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ WORD ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ YOU ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ TYPE
twitch chat
October 2020

Can I get my dick sucked by a tornado?

If you get pulled by a tornado, would the intense winds and stuff on your cock make you cum? And what would happen if that cum get thrown on something like a public park or near a school? Would you get registered if they found out it's your cum?
February 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing