[Copypasta] Tiffany's chandelier

twitchquotes: I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier; it's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I love the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son. And he's the Chief of Police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
twitch chat
November 2018
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Decided I will no longer be paying taxes

Decided I will no longer be paying taxes. What are they gonna do, tax me more? Go ahead. I wont pay those either Oh im going to prison? The one paid for by my tax dollars? Sorry. Didn't pay em. Now there is no prison. I am at least 3 steps ahead of the government at all times.
June 2021

According to all known laws of TFT, there is no way a Soju should be able to fast 9

According to all known laws of TFT, there is no way a Soju should be able to fast 9 with this board. Its gold are too small, and its comp is not stable. The Soju, of course, goes fast 9 anyway because Soju doesn't care what humans think is a fast eif.
July 2022
k3soju

Teamfight Tactics

Mods can't ban me at this pace

twitchquotes: 🐢 SLOW AND STEADY 🐢 WINS THE RACE 🐢 MODS CAN'T BAN ME 🐢 AT THIS PACE 🐢
twitch chat
April 2017

MODS

Classic

Mesmerized

twitchquotes: ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⢉⣠⣴⣴⣦⣦⣄⡉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠐⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡂⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⡟⣽⠂⠈⠉⢢⡻⣿⣿⣿⠟⣩⡖⠉⠄⠉⢷⣽⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣇⠻⠄⠄⠄⠸⠛⣹⣿⣧⡈⠻⠧⠄⠄⢀⠞⢹⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢈⣿⣷⣴⣤⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣤⣤⣶⣾⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⡅⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣙⡛⢛⣋⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢨⣼⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠉⠉⠩⠍⠉⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣯⠄⠄⠈⢻⣿⣿⠁⡀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⢀⠈⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⣽⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠄⠘⠻⠿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
twitch chat
April 2019

Mayor of Canadaland

twitchquotes: ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴀʏᴏʀ ᴏғ ᴄᴀɴᴀᴅᴀʟᴀɴᴅ. ᴡᴇ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴏᴍᴇ ᴍʏ sᴏɴ, ᴇᴠᴇʀ sɪɴᴄᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʟᴇғᴛ ᴜs ᴏᴜʀ sᴀʟᴛ ᴍɪɴᴇs ʜᴀᴠᴇ ʙᴇᴇɴ ʀᴜɴɴɪɴɢ ᴅʀʏ. ɴᴏ ᴏɴᴇ ɪs ᴘʀᴏᴠɪᴅɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇsᴇ ᴘᴏᴏʀ ʜᴀʀᴅ-ᴡᴏʀᴋɪɴɢ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴀʙʟᴇ sᴀʟᴛ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴅᴇsᴇʀᴠᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ᴅᴀɪʟʏ ᴍᴇᴀʟs. ᴡᴇ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏᴄᴛᴀᴠɪᴀɴ.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing