[Copypasta] Tiffany's chandelier

twitchquotes: I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier; it's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I love the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son. And he's the Chief of Police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
twitch chat
November 2018
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Gay chicken

twitchquotes: In high school, I was dared to play "gay chicken", which is where two straight guys pretend to be gay, and the first one to chicken out loses. The other guy and I are both really stubborn, and neither one of us wanted to lose. We've been married 14 years and we run a bed and breakfast in Vermont with out adopted daughter. If that dude doesn't chicken out soon, I'm going to start to suspect that he's actually gay
twitch chat
September 2019

Classic

KappaPride

Bender

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–ˆโ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€ โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€
September 2021

WSB Choose your fighter

Choose your fighter Alex Magikarp ๐ŸŸ Elon TechnoCuckLord ๐Ÿค–+๐Ÿคด Jeff Divorcedzos ๐Ÿ’” Salmonella ๐Ÿ” Nutella ๐Ÿซ Bill "HELL Giga GUH is coming" Clownman ๐Ÿคก Chamath, "I'm abouta fuck shit up" Papaya ๐Ÿˆ Ryan Cocken your butthole ๐Ÿฅ’๐Ÿ’ฆ ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ˜ณ ๐Ÿฅ’ Z ๐Ÿฅ’ U ๐Ÿฅ’ C ๐Ÿฅ’ C ๐Ÿฅ’ Tim ๐ŸŽ Bottom ๐Ÿ…ฑ๏ธENIS Jack Ma MIA ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™‚๏ธ Cathie "A prayer a day keeps the ๐Ÿปs' away" or "Jesus, take my buying power" Woods ๐Ÿ™โœ๏ธ
March 2021

WallStreetBets

Doraemon

โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โข€โฃ โฃคโฃดโฃถโฃถโฃถโฃถโฃถโ ถโฃถโฃคโฃคโฃ€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โข€โฃคโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ โ €โข€โ ˆโขฟโข€โฃ€โ €โ นโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฆโฃ„โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃดโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ ฟโ €โ €โฃŸโก‡โข˜โฃพโฃฝโ €โ €โกโ ‰โ ™โข›โฃฟโฃทโก–โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃพโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ ฟโ ทโ ถโ คโ ™โ ’โ €โ ’โขปโฃฟโฃฟโกทโ ‹โ €โ ดโ žโ ‹โ โข™โฃฟโฃ„ โ €โ €โ €โ €โขธโฃฟโฃฟโฃฏโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโก„โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ‰โขนโก„โ €โ €โ €โ ›โ ›โ ‹โ ‰โ นโก‡ โ €โ €โ €โ €โขธโฃฟโฃฟโ €โ €โ €โฃ€โฃ โฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃผโฃ‡โฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โฃ›โฃ›โฃ’โฃฒโขพโกท โข€โ คโ ’โ ’โขผโฃฟโฃฟโ ถโ žโขปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ โ €โฃผโ ƒ โขฎโ €โ €โ €โ €โฃฟโฃฟโฃ†โ €โ €โ ปโฃฟโกฟโ ›โ ‰โ ‰โ โ €โ ‰โ ‰โ ›โ ฟโฃฟโฃฟโ Ÿโ โ €โฃผโ ƒโ € โ ˆโ “โ ถโฃถโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃงโก€โ €โ ˆโ ’โขคโฃ€โฃ€โก€โ €โ €โฃ€โฃ€โก โ šโ โ €โข€โกผโ ƒโ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ ˆโขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃญโฃญโฃญโฃญโฃญโฃฅโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃดโฃŸโ 
July 2020

im dropping my uwus all over the place

twitchquotes: แต˜สทแต˜ oh frick แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ frick sorry guys แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ sorry im dropping แต˜สทแต˜ my uwus all over the แต˜สทแต˜ place แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ แต˜สทแต˜ sorry
twitch chat
July 2019

Weebs

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