[Copypasta] Tiffany's chandelier

twitchquotes: I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier; it's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I love the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son. And he's the Chief of Police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
twitch chat
November 2018
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Why aren't there any NA teams at Worlds?

twitchquotes: Hi guys I’m new here. But isn’t this a Worldwide league of legends championship? I think It’s really unfair that there aren’t any NA teams, why isn’t such a huge, skilled, representative portion of the playerbase not participating?
twitch chat
November 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

Trump wakes up with a scream and hugs his stuffed bear

twitchquotes: Trump wakes up with a scream and hugs his stuffed bear, "I just had the most awful dream, I was about to be tucked by Kibler!" Trump's bear replies, "That wasn't a dream." As Trump recoils in horror, Kibler smirks, "It seems I'm about to tuck Frump."
twitch chat
June 2015
Trump

A 31 yo Oak Tree named Clara

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, I've been following you for a while now, and today is a big day for me : I'm gonna get married. As weird as it looks, you've been a huge inspiration to me : since I've discovered your stream, I decided to go Vegan, and that's how I met my future wife : a 31 yo Oak Tree named Clara. Thanks again for streaming!
twitch chat
July 2018
Kripp

Megaman

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘β–€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ
November 2014

This is so small to read even for you bro

twitchquotes: α΅€Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ αΆ¦Λ’ Λ’α΅’ ˒ᡐᡃ᢫᢫ α΅—α΅’ Κ³α΅‰α΅ƒα΅ˆ ᡉᡛᡉᢰ αΆ α΅’Κ³ ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ ᡇʳᡒ⋅ α΄°α΅’αΆ°α΅— α΅—Κ³ΚΈ α΅—α΅’ αΆœα΅’αΆ°α΅—αΆ¦αΆ°α΅˜α΅‰ Κ³α΅‰α΅ƒα΅ˆαΆ¦αΆ°α΅ α΅—Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ α΅‡α΅‰αΆœα΅ƒα΅˜Λ’α΅‰ ΚΈα΅’α΅˜Κ³ ᡉʸᡉ˒ Κ·αΆ¦αΆ«αΆ« ˒ᡗᡃʳᡗ α΅—α΅’ Κ°α΅˜Κ³α΅— Λ’α΅’α΅’αΆ° αΆ¦αΆ  ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ α΅ˆα΅’αΆ°α΅— Λ’α΅—α΅’α΅–β‹… α΅‚Κ°ΚΈ α΅ˆα΅’αΆ°α΅— ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ ˒ᡗᡒᡖ﹖⋅⋅⋅⋅ᡍᡒ ᡃʷᡃʸ ᡇʳᡒ α΅ƒαΆ°α΅ˆ Κ³α΅‰α΅ƒα΅ˆ ᡗʰᡉ ᢰᡉˣᡗ αΆœα΅’α΅–ΚΈα΅–α΅ƒΛ’α΅—α΅ƒβ‹… Λ’α΅—α΅’α΅– Κ³α΅‰α΅ƒα΅ˆαΆ¦αΆ°α΅ α΅ƒαΆ«Κ³α΅‰α΅ƒα΅ˆΚΈοΉ— α΄΅ ˒ᡉᡉ ᡗʰᡃᡗ ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ α΅ˆα΅’αΆ°α΅— ʷᡃᢰᢰᡃ ᡍᢦᡛᡉ α΅˜α΅– Κ³α΅‰α΅ƒα΅ˆαΆ¦αΆ°α΅οΉ–β‹…β‹…β‹…Κ·α΅‰αΆ«αΆ« ᡒᡏ, ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ Κ·α΅’αΆ° α΅—Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ ᡗᢦᡐᡉ, α΅‡α΅˜α΅— ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ Λ’Κ°α΅’α΅˜αΆ«α΅ˆ αΆœα΅’α΅–ΚΈα΅–α΅ƒΛ’α΅—α΅‰ α΅—Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ α΅ƒαΆ°α΅ˆ ᡗʰᡃᢰᡏ ᡐᡉ αΆ α΅’Κ³ ʷᡃ˒ᡗᢦᢰᡍ ΚΈα΅’α΅˜Κ³ ᡗᢦᡐᡉ α΅ƒαΆ°α΅ˆ ˒ᡗʳᡉ˒˒ᢦᢰᡍ ΚΈα΅’α΅˜Κ³ ᡉʸᡉ˒ α΅—Κ°α΅’
twitch chat
March 2016
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing