twitchquotes:
My son got kicked out of school for letting a girl jerk him off in class. That's three schools now. Maybe teaching isn't for him. 
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More Copypastas
Random Koala fact of the day
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Hafu
That's some good shit right there
twitchquotes:
๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ good shit goเฑฆิ sHit๐ thats โ some good๐๐shit right๐๐th ๐ ere๐๐๐ rightโthere โโif i do ฦฝaาฏ so my sel๏ฝ ๐ฏ i say so ๐ฏ thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: สณแถฆแตสฐแต แตสฐแตสณแต) mMMMMแทะ๐ฏ ๐๐ ๐ะO0ะเฌ ๏ผฏOO๏ผฏOะเฌ เฌ Ooooแตแตแตแตแตแตแตแตแต๐ ๐๐ ๐ ๐ฏ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐๐Good shit
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Emoji Pasta
Classic
Dex is Kripp's opponent
twitchquotes:
"My apologies" Kripp's opponent emotes as he casts fireball on Kripp, ending Kripps arena run. "That guy was so lucky! He curved out every turn, had every answer and topdecked lethal!" Kripp sighs and loads up another arena run. His opponent closes his laptop and thinks "What a scrub. And now for the cherry on top" as his opponent walks out from the other room goes up to Kripp and licks Kripp's arm. "Good doggie" Kripp says "Here's a treat for a good doggie".
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Kripp
Hearthstone
Just as the founding fathers intended
I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
My dad works at twitch dude
twitchquotes:
My dad works at twitch dude, he's a sr Vice President, and he oversees players accounts. If you don't unban me, I'll make sure he gets both you and majinphil permabanned. But if you unban me, I'll make sure you fit in the algorithms to always have Phil be in people's recommended feed. Your choice.
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