twitchquotes:
My son got kicked out of school for letting a girl jerk him off in class. That's three schools now. Maybe teaching isn't for him. 
twitch chat
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Doritos Chip Pyramid
twitch chat
Kripp
Hey qtpie, you should check your video settings
twitchquotes:
Hey qtpie, you should check your video settings after this game, there seems to be an issue with the stream. The colors of the video fade and entire screen goes gray every 30 or so seconds
twitch chat
imaqtpie
League of Legends
Forsen how DARE you miss lethal
twitchquotes:
Forsen how DARE you miss lethal. You are a pro gamer. I look up to you as my hearthstone mentor, perhaps even as a father figure. My dad wouldn't miss lethal, and neither should you...
twitch chat
Forsen
Hi Michael, it's the ghost of Abraham Lincoln here
twitchquotes:
Hi Michael, it's the ghost of Abraham Lincoln here, 16th president of the USA. Just wondering if you can let me see your minimap. I realize you don't like "ghosting" but maybe you can make an exception for me. Sorry for spooking you.
twitch chat
imaqtpie
My 12 year old son watches Rick and Morty
twitchquotes:
Today my 12 year old son and I walked into harvard to sign him up for college. The dean rudly asked what a 12 year old was doing signing up for such a prestigious institute like harvard. My son took of to reveal his Rick and Morty shirt and proclaimed "Well you see sir I watch Rick and Morty". A look of confusion came over the deans face and I have never been so proud. The dean quickly made sure to appologize to my son but it was too late, the police rushed in and dragged him out. My son passed all his classes with 4.0s and graduated top of his class in the first day of college.
twitch chat