[Copypasta] you are now manually breathing

twitchquotes: :) you are now manually breathing :) you are now manually blinking :) you are aware that your tongue cannot find a comfy place in your mouth :) you are aware of all the itches on your body that need to be scratched :)
twitch chat
July 2017
I used to be a real ad
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Inverted Toucan

dlǝɐsǝ pouΚ‡ qɐuΛ™ Κ‡uxβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘pΗΚŒα΄‰ΙΉΙΉΙβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘sɐΙ₯β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘uɐɔnoΚ‡β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘Ηlβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–€β–ˆβ–β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–€β–€β–Œβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
June 2019

PogChamp

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘ β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘ β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘ β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–’β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–’β–„β–€β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–’β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–“β–’β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–“β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–‘β–“β–€β–€β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
November 2014

RATIO? WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?

RATIO? RATIO? WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN, WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE KIDS SAYING THESE DAYS? RATIO? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE SOME SORT OF VIOLENT BRAIN DAMAGE? RATIO THIS, L THAT. ARE YOU PEOPLE ACTUALLY MENTALLY CHALLENGED? HOLY SHIT LIKE. RATIO IS A FUCKING MATH TERM YOU DERANGED DEGENERATE BASEMENT DWELLING MORONS CAN YOU STUPID DENSE MOTHERFUCKERS SAY ANYTHING ELSE? SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP
April 2022

Forg

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠀⠴⠢⠢⠀⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⑴⠛③⠦⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£€β£ β ΄β’Šβ •β Šβ ‰β ‰β ‰β ’β‘˜β €β €β €β €β €β €β ‘β£”β£šβ££β‘€β£€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£€β£ β ΄β –β ‹β β €β €β »β£Ÿβ£‹β£™β »β ₯β žβ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ‰β €β €β €β €β’³β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£€β‘΄β –β ›β ‰β €β’€β‘”β ‹β ‰β‘€β €β ”β ’β ’β ’β β šβ ›β ›β ›β ›β “β ’β ’β ²β €β €β €β €β ”β‘²β šβ €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£ β‘΄β šβ ‰β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ ³β ¦β ”β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ ‰β ‰β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β’ β‘žβ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β‘Œβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⒰⣅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ β €β €β €β£Όβ β €β’€β£ β €β Άβ Άβ Άβ Άβ Άβ’€β‘€β €β €β €β €β €β’ β‘˜β’¦β‘€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£Ώβ €β ­β£²β‘¦β‘΄β’Ύβ‘Ÿβ β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β‘‡β €β£Όβ ‹β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ’³β‘€β €β €β €β €β ™β’¦β£™β£„β£€β£€β‘€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β‘β €β €β €β£Ώβ‘Όβ ²β ½β †β €β €β €β € β €β €β °β‘‡β’°β‘‡β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£³β €β €β €β €β €β €β£―β’¬β ±β£Ÿβ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£Έβ’€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β£§β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’€β‘΄β ƒβ €β €β €β €β €β €β β ˆβ “β šβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£°β ƒβ €β£³β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € ⠀⠀⠀⠁⠸⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠒⠻⠯⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⠾⠿⠭⠭⠴⠦⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ ›β “β ²β Άβ’¦β£„β €β’ β£€β šβ’Άβ Ίβ Ώβ Άβ ³β Άβ Άβ Άβ ¦β ¦β €β ΄β Άβ Άβ ’β ‹β β ‰β ‰β ™β ’β ’β ’β ²β –β šβ ‰β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ’·β£ˆβ£Ώβ ›β Άβ ·β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ‰β ‰β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €
February 2021

Stonks only go up. But you don't.

You watch her as she brushes her hair. She’s humming a song you can’t quite hear and smiling to herself. Not for the first time, you wonder why this person chose you. She turns. β€œWhat do you want for Christmas?” You want to scream Save your money!, but you only shrug. β€œNothing, really.” β€œNothing?” She crawls into bed and touches your leg. β€œAre you sure?” Again, you wonder why this person chose you. As she takes the weight of you in her hand, your mind wanders. To your puts. They’ll expire worthless, like you. After several minutes of failing to conjure your manhood, she asks, β€œWhat’s wrong?” Stonks only go up. But you don’t.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

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