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By All That Is Holy I Summon Fish Moley
By All That Is Holy I Summon Fish Moley
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You toss and turn as Elon gently rubs your shoulders
You toss and turn as Elon gently rubs your shoulders. "You seem a little tense" says Elon, as you look at your bank account. Your phone shows $107 left to your name. You think to yourself while Elon rubs you down, you pull open Robin Hood, type in TSLA. Leaps $900 JAN 2023' are only $1 you can afford 1 leap. This is finally your chance to get rich, you'll be able to actually buy a Tesla. You ask Elon what the next Tesla will be. He says "U, for 'you'" as he smiles sweetly. You picture him dancing on stage explaining U S3XY to everyone multiple times as you smile back at him.
All of a sudden Elon flips on the TV to CNBC to catch the tail end of Jim Cramer, you see a new law has been passed, "we believe options have inflated the markets into a bubble, we will be imposing a new rule next week only allowing accounts that qualify for day trades to also purchase options with a $25,000 barrier to entry."
You start weeping aloud, you feel a caring hand wipe your tear away, it's Elon again, "what's wrong my little X'√π3?"
Suddenly you wake, you're in a pool of sweat, at first you panic about the new options policy, then you're filled with relief realizing that options aren't restricted it was all a dream.
You realize this was actually a vision to earn 200,000% gains to buy a TSLA leap. You log into RH, it welcomes you with your $107 balance, you plug in TSLA yolo 2023 @ $900 and realize the options are actually $20 each. The best you can do is $900 TSLA weekly expiring around Christmas.
In a slight fit of despair you try to remember the feeling of Elon rubbing your cheek, and rub one out onto your stomach, then roll over back to sleep. A single tear rolls from your eye into your waifu pillow.
YOLO you whisper.
WallStreetBets
Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos create Biff Gatezos
Lea pegging Reynad
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ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ Google Pegging or RIOT ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ LEA PEGGING REYNAD OR RIOT ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ
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Reynad
My IQ is extremely, almost embarrassingly, high
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My IQ is extremely, almost embarrassingly, high. I've never actually taken an IQ test, mind you, but my educated guess is that, if I did, my score would be whatever is the highest possible. No doubt your IQ is lower than mine, but please don't feel stupid or insecure about this, it's not your fault. You're probably just born that way. And you know what? Thank your lucky stars and subpar genetic makeup that you don't have to bear the burden of brilliance like I have to. Being incredibly intelligent is a curse. This is not just one of the many astute observations I have every day, by the way, it is a fact recently confirmed by science.
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TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH
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⛏ ⛏ 
💵 TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH ⛏ 💵 TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH ⛏ 💵 TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH ⛏ 💵
💵 TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH ⛏ 💵 TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH ⛏ 💵 TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH ⛏ 💵
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