[Copypasta] I'm just a poor pasta maker

twitchquotes: I'm just a poor pasta maker struggling to make a living in this world. I may not be as fast as those big pasta factories with their fancy machines, but I am committed to providing you a quality pasta experience. I use only the freshest and dankest artisanal memes, and I can assure you that when you RIP in spaghetti, you'll never forgetti.
twitch chat
January 2017
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Ben Shapiro asks his mom to buy him the Lego Death Star

Alright mom, you think that the Lego Death Star is too expensive of a set for my birthday which hypothetically- hypothetically lets take a look at the facts (which don't care about your feelings) in a situation where, hypothetically, you get it for my birthday. So, we take a look at the numbers it's $499.99 but it has 4,016 pieces, and that means it comes down to a price point of about 12.4 cents per piece and that's a fact, that's a fact (that doesn't care about your feelings). And even though that might be seemingly pricey in comparison to other lego sets, lets take a look at the minifigures. We have Han Solo in a Stormtrooper outfit, we have Luke Skywalker also in a Stormtrooper outfit, these are exclusives for the set since 2001. And it's a fact that you can recreate epic scenes- hypothetically, hypothetically, from A New Hope and Return of The Jedi if I had this set and I think the facts add up, that you should buy me this set (regardless of your feelings)
January 2021

Ben Shapiro

Shotgun Pepe

⡏⠛⢿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣧⣀⡀⠄⠹⠟⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣧⠄⢈⡄⣄⠄⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⢸⣧⠘⢹⣦⣄⠈⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣷⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡈⣙⠟⠉⠉⠙⠋⠉⠹⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⡄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠄⠄⣀⠄⢠⣀⠄⡨⣹ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⣇⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠈⠛⠿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⠄⠄⠈⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠤⣶⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠷⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⠄⠈⠋⠄⠄⣠⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿
ascii art
January 2019

Pepe

Play a pirate rogue or we will be forced stir up a great mutiny!

twitchquotes: ╰[✖Ĺ̯ಠ]╯Ahoy, matey! Play a pirate rogue or we will be forced stir up a great mutiny!╰[✖Ĺ̯ಠ]╯
twitch chat
March 2015
Reynad

Professional headmeat physician

twitchquotes: ce: Hello Tyler, this is Dhanraj Ameer, the professional headmeat physician, thank you for contacting me last week. My team and I have been looking at x-rays of your skull and we are interested in a procedure that involves taking the head meat from the sides of your head and using it to fill in the dent in the middle. Due to the severity of your head meat slabs this procedure only has a 10% likelihood of success due to the extreme invasiveness the slab removal will take. Let me know
twitch chat
July 2019
Tyler1

Repeating yourselves like parrots

twitchquotes: Wow, you imbeciles are especially stupid tonight. Repeating yourselves like parrots, spouting puerile taunts at each other, using crude 'emoticons'... Can you even form SENTENCES? One day you'll all be too dumb to even type your 'dongers,' and then twitch chat can finally have some merit. Until then, I'll stick to the moderated streams..
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

I hate Twitch Chat

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