[Copypasta] I'm just a poor pasta maker

twitchquotes: I'm just a poor pasta maker struggling to make a living in this world. I may not be as fast as those big pasta factories with their fancy machines, but I am committed to providing you a quality pasta experience. I use only the freshest and dankest artisanal memes, and I can assure you that when you RIP in spaghetti, you'll never forgetti.
twitch chat
January 2017
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

I am a silent guardian, I am the Dark Knight

twitchquotes: ᴏɴᴄᴇ ᴜᴘᴏɴ ᴀ ᴛɪᴍᴇ, ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴡᴀs ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴋɪᴅ ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ Kʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀɪɴᴏ, ᴡʜᴏ ʜᴏᴘᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪɴɢ's ᴋɴɪɢʜᴛ. ᴏɴᴇ ᴅᴀʏ ᴀ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀɪɴᴏ ᴛᴏʟᴅ ʜɪᴍ "ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴀ ᴋɴɪɢʜᴛ, ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴋɪʟʟ ᴛʜᴇ ɴᴀᴢɪ ᴍᴏᴅᴇʀɪɴᴏs". ᴛʜᴇ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀɪɴᴏ ᴡɪᴇʟᴅᴇᴅ ʜɪs sᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴀɴᴅ ᴄᴜᴛ ɪᴛ ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏᴅᴇʀɪɴᴏs ᴄʜᴇsᴛs. <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ "ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴀ sɪʟᴇɴᴛ ɢᴜᴀʀᴅɪᴀɴ, ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴀʀᴋ ᴋɴɪɢʜᴛ".
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

FailFish

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠉⡉⠈⠙⠛⠋⢉⣙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢋⣭⣴⣶⣾⡛⡶⡶⢤⣾⣇⣈⣧⡤⠈⢙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⣤⣶⣷⣿⣯⣉⣤⣴⢶⣴⣯⣽⣿⣿⣛⣿⣿⣧⠻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣃⢌⣺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⡋⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⢻⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⢁⣴⣯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⢻⣿ ⣿⣿⣡⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡎⣿ ⡿⢡⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢻⡟⣿⣿⠟⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿ ⠇⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⢹ ⣦⢿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡼ ⣿⣷⣌⢻⣿⠃⠀⣧⠀⠀⠀⡠⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⠙⠀⠀⡏⠀⠀⡐⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢏⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⡿⠃⠀⢀⣠⠔⠀⠀⣴⣶⣶⣦⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⣼⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⣠⠟⠁⠀⣠⣾⣇⣠⣽⡏⠉⣿⣿⡿⢋⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠞⠁⠀⠀⣼⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠀⢠⣿⠯⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⣉⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡯⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⢀⣀⠁⠀⠀⠀⣴⡾⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡄⣼⡿⣱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣥⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⢀⣠⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣥⣐⡲⡹⣒⣾⣴⠠⣬⣝⣛⣛⣿⣯⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣭⣝⣘⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2020

Lonely Moby Dick

twitchquotes: So in Moby Dick why does Captain Ahab never consider that the whale is just lonely and looking for love? Clearly it's been through a lot from the scarring and probably wants to settle down in it's golden years. Personnally, if i were captain, i would have been a good human and take 2 and a half feet of whale cock to ease his pain
twitch chat
June 2020

No, you’re NOT a real gamer.

No, you’re NOT a real gamer. I’m so sick of all these people that think they’re gamers. No, you’re not. Most of you are not even close to being gamers. I see these people saying “I put well over 100 hours in this game, it’s great!” that’s nothing, most of us can easily put 300+ hours in all our games. I see people who only have a Nintendo Switch and claim to be gamers. Come talk to me when you pick up a PS4 controller then we be friends. Also DEAR ALL WOMEN: Pokémon is not a real game. Animal Crossing is not a real game. The Sims is not a real game. Mario is not a real game. Stardew valley is not a real game. Mobile games are NOT.REAL.GAMES. put down the baby games and play something that requires challenge and skill for once. Sincerely, all of the ACTUAL gamers.
June 2021

NA “Near Airport” Worlds speedrunning

twitchquotes: NA “Near Airport” is known as the fastest region to arrive at the Airport. Since they gave up on the LoL Worlds Championship, they are investing in Speedruns. In particular they are current worldrecord holders in Airport Any % and Airport no wins.
twitch chat
October 2020
Riot Games

League of Legends

EU vs NA

Text-to-Speech Playing