I used to be a real ad
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My wife told me to talk dirty to her

So the wife and I were getting into it and she told me to talk dirty to her. So I called her a filthy slut. She said “dirtier!” So I smacked her around and told her I was going to use her like the cheap whore she is. She said “dirtier!” So I said “I’m gonna stick some SQQQ in your portfolio. I’m gonna put it in long and deep. I’m gonna fill you up with way OTM SPY puts.” She then slapped me, packed a bag and took the kids. I think we’re getting a divorce.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

Kripp's sonnerino from the future

twitchquotes: Kʀɪᴘᴘ, ɪᴛ's ʏᴏᴜʀ sᴏɴɴᴇʀɪɴᴏ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ғᴜᴛᴜʀᴇ, ᴄᴏɴᴄᴇɪᴠᴇᴅ ɪɴ Gʀᴇᴇᴄᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɴᴅ Tʀᴜᴍᴘ's ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs ᴛᴏᴜᴄʜᴇᴅ. Yᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴛʀᴀᴄᴛᴇᴅ ᴀ ʜɪɢʜʟʏ ʟᴇɢᴀʟ ғᴏʀᴍ ᴏғ ᴀɪᴅs ᴛʜᴀᴛ sᴏᴏɴ ɪɴғᴇᴄᴛ ᴇᴀʀᴛʜᴇʀɪɴᴏ. Tʜᴇ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴜʀᴇ ɪs ᴀ ᴘʜᴇʀᴏᴍᴏɴᴇ sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛᴇᴅ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴏɴʟʏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴋɴᴇᴇ. Pᴀᴘᴀ, ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴜsᴛ ʟɪᴄᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴋɴᴇᴇ! Pʟs ɴᴏ ғᴇᴛᴛᴜᴄᴄɪɴᴏ ᴀʟғᴀ ʀᴏᴍᴇᴏ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad

Cattarrian is Rania's last Boyfriend

twitchquotes: Hᴇʏ Kʀɪᴘᴘ, Cᴀᴛᴛᴀʀʀɪᴀɴ ʜᴇʀᴇ. I ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴍʏ ᴄᴏɴsᴛᴀɴᴛ Mᴇᴏᴡᴇʀɪɴᴏ ɪs ᴀɴɴᴏʏɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ, ʙᴜᴛ I ᴀᴍ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴛʀʏɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴡᴀʀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ Sᴜᴄᴄᴜʙᴜs. Yᴏᴜ sᴇᴇ, I ᴀᴍ ᴀᴄᴛᴜᴀʟʟʏ ʜᴇʀ ʟᴀsᴛ BF ᴛᴜʀɴᴇᴅ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴀ Cᴀᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ ᴜsɪɴɢ Bʟᴀᴄᴋ Mᴀɢɪᴄ ᴀɴᴅ ᴅᴏɴᴜᴛs. Iᴛ's ᴛᴏᴏ ʟᴀᴛᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴇ, ʙᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ sᴛɪʟʟ sᴀᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀsᴇʟғ. Rᴜɴ Kʀɪᴘᴘ ʀᴜɴ!!!
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

Please stop hoarding Hearthstone dust

twitchquotes: ༼ ºل͟º ༽ Well Met Kripp, this is Doctorino Dongerino. I urge you: pls stop hoarding Hearthstone dust. Breathing in all that dust will cause your lungs to RIP in pepperonis. Pls copypasta to save Kripp life ༼ ºل͟º ༽
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Reynad keeps escaped walruses from the local zoo

twitchquotes: Wᴇʟʟ ᴍᴇᴛ Rᴇʏɴᴀᴅ! I ᴀᴍ Dᴀɴ Gᴜʟ, ᴏᴡɴᴇʀ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴏᴄᴀʟ ᴢᴏᴏ. Wʜɪʟᴇ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴡᴇ ɴᴏᴛɪᴄᴇᴅ sᴏᴍᴇ ᴅɪsᴛᴜʀʙɪɴɢ sᴏᴜɴᴅs ᴄᴏᴍɪɴɢ ғʀᴏᴍ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴍɪᴄ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴇ ʙᴇʟɪᴇᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴄᴇɴᴛʟʏ ᴇsᴄᴀᴘᴇᴅ ᴡᴀʟʀᴜsᴇs. Iғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ʀᴇᴛᴜʀɴ ᴏᴜʀ ᴡᴀʟʀᴜsᴇs ᴡɪᴛʜɪɴ 24 ʜᴏᴜʀs, ᴡᴇ ᴡɪʟʟ ʜᴀᴠᴇ Tᴡɪᴛᴄʜ sʜᴜᴛ ᴅᴏᴡɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄʜᴀɴɴᴇʟ. I'ᴍ ʙᴀɪᴛɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ.
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad
What happened to this ad? :(

As soon as you stop being hardcore

twitchquotes: "H-h-ey Rania, could we go on a date when I visit Europe for ESGN?" Kripp blushes as he asks him timidly over skype. "It doesn't have to be serious, just coffee or something." Rania smirks. "Sure Kripp, as soon as you stop being hardcore," She types while tucking Frump
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

I'm not gonna read that

twitchquotes: I'm not gonna read that. Fuck you.
twitch chat
July 2014
Reynad

How will this affect my propain?

twitchquotes: hey reynad, gril here, i am sad to say that i have a leak, how will this affect my propain?
twitch chat
July 2014
Reynad

Could you guys be more serious and stop the spamming

twitchquotes: guys could you please be a little serious and stop the spamming? people are trying to enjoy the stream here, its hard to find a place where im accepted for who i am and when i see you all spam kripps chat it makes me feel rly bad because i know that he wants you to learn instead of joke around as well
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Damn missed the TSLA pump

Damn missed the TSLA pump... just like last week... and last month.... and last year
January 2021

WallStreetBets

I used to be a real ad

Kripp's streaming checklist

twitchquotes: *stretch* ☑ "mmmm kay" ☑ "yeah alright" ☑ "fuckin A" ☑ "if he drew anything else I would've won" ☑ "how's this guy SO LUCKY?" ☑ "TOPDECK FLAMESTRIKE, YEAP" ☑ "topdeck into topdeck into topdeck, yeah that's how you get 12 wins guys" ☑
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

DONGER DIPLOMACY

twitchquotes: (ง ͠° ل͜ °)ง LET ME DEMONSTRATE DONGER DIPLOMACY (ง ͠° ل͜ °)ง
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

Kripp when do you start being a sellout?

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, Just wondering when you're going to start selling Nvidia™ Tshirts and Cups?, Or even better, Do you think we can get some HyperX™ ram discounts on G2A®? While you're at it, I think you should have some giveaways for Subway® Giftcards™?
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

sellout

Hi, my name is Artour Babaev

twitchquotes: Hi, my name is Artour Babaev, I was born on south russia, in a small farm of Salt, my entire life was all about salt, I would farm salt with my father rino, in fact, my life was so full of salt, my friends named me "PPD", until some gang of Spooky Scary Skeletons killed him. To this day, I vowed to kill all skeltons to avenge my father, dont cpy pastarino my storyno
twitch chat
November 2014
SingSing

Military intervention on the territory of Kripparrian chat

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノTHIS IS MILITARY INTERVENTION ON THE TERRITORY OF KRIPPARRIAN CHAT, WE ARE TRYING TO PROTECT RUSSIANS IN THIS CHAT!! WE TAKING 1/3 OF THE CHAT OVER ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

FAKER RIGHT IN THE PUSSY

twitchquotes: FAKER RIGHT IN THE PUSSY
twitch chat
August 2014
ognglobal

Hello Kripp, this is your mother

twitchquotes: Hello kripp. This is your mother, I saw that "brofist" you just gave to one of your subscribers. Don't make me come to Athens and make you give him a better brofist. Haven't I taught you better fisting? Love always, mum
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Leifman is abusing his authority as mod again

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, it has come to my attention that one of your mods "Leifman" has been abusing his authority as mod and banning people for no good reason. I would appreciate if you took some time out of your schedule to take action and remove his mod status. Thank you!
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp

Dear Kripparian, how dare you

twitchquotes: Dear Kripparian, how dare you... I have dedicated my life to Hearthstone. I am a proud Hearthstoner and so are the rest of your fans. You cannot betray us and start playing a Hearthstone competitor. I can fall asleep to your HS streams because of how casual it is, but this game is too complicated and it keeps me awake. If you betray us we will rise up, you have been warned.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

What happened to this ad? :(

Disappointed that Reynad doesn't live in the Dead Sea

twitchquotes: I was disappointed to find that when i flew to the Dead Sea to realize that Reynad doesn't live there, considering it's the saltiest sea in the world.
twitch chat
October 2014
Reynad
Text-to-Speech Playing