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Great Thermo-War

twitchquotes: It is the year 2134. I am one of the last people on the planet. Nearly everyone was wiped out in the Great Thermo-War. Now there is no reason to live. I open my holodeck-transponder and go to "Twitch tv". I turn on Kripp's stream and see that he has made it to Rank 10. I succumb to my radiation poisoning.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Leifman, please go back to work in the salt plant

twitchquotes: Stop it, guys. I'm Leifman's sister, and mother of our beautiful little daughter, Leifgirl. The spam and constant harassment in this chat is driving my beloved Leifman insane. Since he became moderator, he's spending all his time here, and can't provide for his family, anymore. Please, Leifman, get back to work in our salt plant, we need the money.
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

Chungus has no beginning. Chungus has no end

Chungus has no beginning. Chungus has no end. Chungus is infinite. Millions of years after our civilization has been eradicated and forgotten, Chungus will endure. Chungus is eternal. The pinnacle of evolution and existence. We are but rudimentary creatures of blood and flesh. We touch Chungus' mind, fumbling in ignorance, incapable of understanding. Organic life is nothing but a genetic mutation, an accident. Our lives are measured in years and decades. We wither and die. Chungus is eternal. Before it, we are nothing. Chungus imposes order on the chaos of organic life. We exist because Chungus allows it, and we will end because Chungus demands it. Chungus transcends our very understanding. We cannot grasp the nature of Chungus' existence.
March 2021

D3 is boring

twitchquotes: Hmm, something tells me that Kripps audience has gotten enough from D3 for most part... Just can't really put my finger on... ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Thanks Nivea!

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ GUYS GUYS , just used new Nivea Lotion on my donger and now it looks 10 years youger , THANKS NIVEA ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

Robinhood halts trading on President's Day

This is bullshit. I’m disgusted and I’m honestly on the verge of having a mental fucking breakdown. Robinhood has once again halted trading. But this time it’s halted on all stocks. This fine Monday morning I wake up to find that all orders aren’t going to be filled till tomorrow morning. My dad’s wife’s girlfriend is a powerful lawyer in Boca Raton and I’m seriously considering retaining her services and filing a class action lawsuit against these citadel dick munchers. This has happened to me too many times. I’m low key spiraling into madness. Donate to me on onlyfans if you want to contribute towards the legal fees. She’s giving me a pretty kickass discount, but she estimates it’s still going to cost $150k. This happens to be the amount I lost on gme, but this is not relevant to the conversation here. It’s time to rise up and take down robinhood once and for all. Also, yeah my stepmom has a girlfriend. It’s 2021 you bigots.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Ok chat, I'm not seeing nearly enough spam in here

twitchquotes: Ok chat, I'm not seeing nearly enough spam in here, I mean I thought this was supposed to be "the worst chat in twitch" and this is all you got!? The KPM in this chat is WAY too low, it is actually depressing. How am I supposed to enjoy chat without dongers, "FrankerZ's", and the occasional elephant?
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie

Tyler fatigue from nutrient deficiencies

twitchquotes: @loltyler1 your lack of fruit intake is not the reason for your deficiencies in certain vitamins and minerals, namely Zinc, Magnesium and Vitamin D3. If you are deficient in these you can experience fatigue, brain fog and low testosterone levels. Zn is found in great amounts in red meat and oysters while Mg is found in leafy greens. If you are unable to eat these foods, I suggest buying a Chelated Zinc and a Magnesium Glycinate supplement. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3
twitch chat
February 2019
Tyler1

CEO of Campbells Tomato Paste

twitchquotes: (▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿) Hello Kripp i am CEO of Campbells Tomato Paste. This stream is now under my control i bought all rights to paste and pastarino products if anyone copy and pastes again i will sue you so dont copy and paste (▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

gay brazilians

twitchquotes: Hi Bjergsen I am from Brazil and just like many brazilians, I am gay, and I would really like to have a bed time with you and listen to your cutie voice and perhaps do some coitus and engage and marry eachother. Our wedding would be in some favela of Rio de Janeiro. What do you think????????????
twitch chat
July 2014
Bjergsen

KappaPride

I used to be a real ad

Guys chill with the copy pastas

twitchquotes: Guys chill with the copy pastas. We have already read the message once, we don’t need to see it again. Some people are actually trying to send unique messages, please be considerate
twitch chat
March 2019

Kripp's IQ is officially more than 1000

twitchquotes: nice win man you totally outplayed him on every level, every single play you did showed a whole new level of skill and meta beyond our mortal brains understandings, i have no idea how its even humanly possible to be so amazing at this card game as you are Kripp, your IQ is officially more than 1000
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp

Kripp discovered one weird trick to look twice his age

twitchquotes: Kripp is the remarkable twenty year old that discovered one weird trick to look twice his age. It's called being VEGAN and it limits your body’s nutritional intake and makes you look and feel TWICE AS OLD. Why would anyone want to be vegan you may ask, well all vegans hate animals so they eat all the animals food so that they starve to death.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Reynad and Lea

twitchquotes: ＲＥＹＮＡＤ ＡＮＤ ＬＥＡ ＳＩＴＴＩＮ ＯＮ Ａ ＤＥＣＫ, Ｗ - Ｅ - Ｌ - Ｌ - Ｍ - Ｅ - Ｔ
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad

Joseph Kony's message to Kripp

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, I am famous child soldier militia commander Joseph Kony. I want to help you make your own child soldier militia too so we can fight the white man as one. I hope you make the right decision and remember, dongerino dongerino please no copi pasterino banerino Al Pacino cappuccino orange moccha frappuccino steal your kiderino.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

RATIO? WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?

RATIO? RATIO? WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN, WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE KIDS SAYING THESE DAYS? RATIO? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE SOME SORT OF VIOLENT BRAIN DAMAGE? RATIO THIS, L THAT. ARE YOU PEOPLE ACTUALLY MENTALLY CHALLENGED? HOLY SHIT LIKE. RATIO IS A FUCKING MATH TERM YOU DERANGED DEGENERATE BASEMENT DWELLING MORONS CAN YOU STUPID DENSE MOTHERFUCKERS SAY ANYTHING ELSE? SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP
April 2022

Subs vs non-subs

twitchquotes: The best part about being a non-sub is that the chat spam seems real. If a sub is spamming it’s obvious they are just spamming for fun or to troll, because who would give money to a streamer they don’t like? By being a non-sub the possible genuine confusion and disinterest is actually there. And that’s something subs can’t get.
twitch chat
July 2020

Kripps stream makes you want to drink hard

twitchquotes: u wot m8? i swer u are one cheeky cunt mate, say it to my face and not online and we'll see what happens. i swer 2 christ I'll hook you in the gabba. you better shut your mouth or im calling me homeboys rite now preparin for a proper rumble. tha rumble thatll make your nan sore jus hearin bout it. yer in proper mess ya nob head.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

I can’t escape Fortnite

twitchquotes: I can’t escape Fortnite. I was on an airplane half an hour ago and through my headphones I heard some guy ask, “Do you play Fortnite?”. At first I couldn’t process the words, but I understood after he reiterated. “Dude, do you play Fortnite?” Then I heard someone respond behind me. “Fortnite?” Then another. “Yeah, that game.” I couldn’t shut them out before the cabin erupted into a chorus of Fortnite conversations. I felt like I was being suffocated. The man previously sleeping beside me woke up suddenly and contributed with “where we droppin' boys?”. The crying kid across the aisle stopped kicking and screaming just to say “Tilted Towers!”
twitch chat
November 2018

Fortnite

(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

Stand back foul milkerino

twitchquotes: <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ I am the knight of healtherino. Stand back foul milkerino <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
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