I used to be a real ad
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So as a joke, I fucked my friend in a Red M&M cosplay

So as a joke, I went to my friend's house wearing Red M&M’s wrapper and shoes. I could barely stop my laughter as he went as red as an M&M and looked at me from head to toe with a bit of drool in his mouth. The way he stared made mde feel a bit funny too, but I decided to tease him more by taking off my wrapper. He asked me, "Are you serious?" and I said "It’s that kind of party." He went silent for what seemed like forever, so I asked him, "What's the matter, can’t resist my chocolaty interior?" He said he's confused, but then his boner got really hard, which made me take off his clothes. I expected him to scream, "Stop!" as I kissed him and stroked his cock, but he instead shouted "I melt in your mouth, not in your hands!" which made me get a boner myself. Before I knew it, I was blowing him for the first time till he came. His semen was so thick, it got stuck inside my throat no matter how hard I swallowed. He then said, "I want to fuck you now!" and seeing that we've already gone that far and we were both naked, I obliged. A few hours later, the jerk went all pale and said to me "Why did we do that? Now I'm not fucking straight." But he still looked so cute all confused like that, so I took pity on him and reassured while wiping his cum off my face, "Let's just pretend I'ms till Red M&M."
September 2021

Mr I'm too dank to call or write my fans

twitchquotes: dear mr im too dank to call or write my fans. this is the last meme ill ever send your ass. its been 6 months and still no accept. i dont deserve it? i know you got my last two friend requests i wrote the memes on em perfect. i love you cutie, we culdve been together think about it
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie
I used to be a real ad

Sneaky's bad TFT advice

twitchquotes: Hello Mr. Zachary. My name is Inigo Montoya and you killed my chances of making it to Top 4. I listened to your advice when you said that Cavalier comp is “LIT.” Every time I play it I get a fast 8th. For that reason, Mr. Scuderi, prepare to die.
twitch chat
May 2021
Sneaky

Teamfight Tactics

I am a cute Korean Challenger Supermodel

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ, ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴀ ᴄᴜᴛᴇ ᴋᴏʀᴇᴀɴ ᴄʜᴀʟʟᴇɴɢᴇʀ sᴜᴩᴇʀᴍᴏᴅᴇʟ (>‿◠)✌ ᴀɴᴅ ɪ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ ʟᴇᴛ yᴏᴜ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ᴄᴀʀʀy ᴀʟʟ ᴀᴅᴅ ᴀɴᴅ ғᴜᴄᴋ ᴀʟʟ ɴɪɢʜᴛ. ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie

Please pray for Kripp's ears

twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
I used to be a real ad

My name is Reynad!

twitch chat
October 2014
TidesOfTime

Now I remember why I fell asl...

twitchquotes: Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes. His face comes closer as he plants his wet lips onto mine. We are locked together in a beautiful display of love. Then I wake up. I look at Kripp's stream. He is playing Mill Druid. Now I remember why I fell asl... ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Kripp uploads a video that breaks Pornhub's terms of use

twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp

The POLICE Just Stopped ME

twitchquotes: The POLICE Just Stopped ME Came Up To My Window An Said "PAPERS"? So I Said "SCISSORS" I WON & Drove OFF The guy Must Want A REMATCH Cuz He Been CHASING Me For The Past 10 MINUTES 😳😩
twitch chat
August 2018

Let's snipe

twitchquotes: "PARFAIT!", says the Chief of the French Police. "We now have ze best one! Come my friend, together we can stop ze terrorists! Welcome to our ZNIPER TEAM!!". A smile appears on HufferNudes face. "Let's snipe".
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(

France always loses wars to England?

You’re right, France does always lose wars to England. Except: The Norman invasion 1066. The Anglo-French War 1213-1214. Anglo-French War 1294-1303. War of Saint-Sardos 1324. Hundred Years’ War 1337-1453. War of the league of Cambrai 1512-1514. Italian War of 1542-46. The Rough Wooing 1543-1550. Italian War of 1551-59. English expedition to France 1562-1563. The Anglo-French War 1627-1629. Second Anglo-Dutch War 1665-1667. The Nine Years’ War 1688-1697. The American Revolutionary War. War of the French Revolution 1793-1802. Anglo-Spanish War 1796-1808. War of the First Coalition. War of the Second Coalition. War of the Third Coalition. War of the Fourth Coalition. And the War of the Fifth Coalition. But aside from all those England always beats France.
May 2021

You have been gifted another INCOMING HYDRA

twitchquotes: ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۞۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ You have been gifted another INCOMING HYDRA. Type HandsUp to summon. ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۞۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
twitch chat
September 2020

KappaPride

An anime character stronger than Twilight Sparkle?

twitchquotes: Is there an anime character stronger than Twilight Sparkle? And I'm referring to supercharged Alicorn Princess Twilight Sparkle with Princess Celestia's guidance, full understanding of the Power of Friendship, control of The Elements of Harmony and Spike, equipped with her royal tiara, the Castle of Friendship, and the Rainbow Friendship Kingdom, as well as her Rainbow Sheen and Rainbow Power, with the magic of all the Alicorns implanted in her chest to give her full control of magic?
twitch chat
September 2017

Misogynist Pig Kripp

twitchquotes: you have an "!imgay" response but don't have an "!imbi", "!imtrans*", "!imfurry", "!imreallyacat", or "!imfeminist" response? misogynist pig kripp
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Privyet, Komrade Toast!

twitchquotes: Privyet, Komrade Toast! Is your cousin Dmitri from Mother Russia! I am of hearing that you make much moneys by playing simplistic chess game for toddlers and whining like little baby in front of thousands of simpletons! BLYAT! You should play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go! Already I am recruit by man with enormous forehead for professional team Tampon Storm and will be winning many tournaments, yes! Don't be a cyka, you capitalist pig, and stop crying like baby! Love, Dmitri.
twitch chat
July 2019
DisguisedToast

Teamfight Tactics

I used to be a real ad

The One Who Brings Salt

twitchquotes: Tells the legend that a long time ago all sea's water was fresh. But one tragic day a baby came out of the sea and was found by a group of african sea men. One week later, after the little baby saw the sea men play Hearth of Stone all the water turned salty. So they named him Kripp, which in Afrikaans means The One Who Brings Salt
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Buying calls on Gamestop

I can't believe that after fifteen years of trading, my best trade of all time is going to be buying calls on fucking Gamestop.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

RATIO? WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?

RATIO? RATIO? WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN, WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE KIDS SAYING THESE DAYS? RATIO? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE SOME SORT OF VIOLENT BRAIN DAMAGE? RATIO THIS, L THAT. ARE YOU PEOPLE ACTUALLY MENTALLY CHALLENGED? HOLY SHIT LIKE. RATIO IS A FUCKING MATH TERM YOU DERANGED DEGENERATE BASEMENT DWELLING MORONS CAN YOU STUPID DENSE MOTHERFUCKERS SAY ANYTHING ELSE? SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP
April 2022

Kripp's stream is like watching paint dry

twitchquotes: How the ever loving *** is this guy getting 24k people to watch him play HS? It's like having a small country collectively decide to grow an interest in watching paint dry. Boggles the mind. Really.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Sorry, just a fact of how I feel

twitchquotes: No I'm just not call with white supremacy y'all. It's really not that... I think a lot of you gamers are actually white supremacists. Sorry, just a fact of how I feel.
twitch chat
May 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing