[Copypasta] I would like to inform you that I busted a huge nut to your shot

I would like to inform you that I busted a huge nut to your shot. My earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen anyone in the near vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or will ever produce, shot out so hard that it ripped my dick apart by my übernut accelerating to 7% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused my building to collapse, and every female in the city to fall pregnant with my children. As I lay dying under the rubble, I rest assured knowing every one of my sons will repeat this glorious act.
January 2024
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Huntard is confused

twitchquotes: huntard is confused. undertaker was played turn one, but opponent lives. Even greetings traveller and overpowered doge card did not wonnered. A single tear rolls down his face as he concedes. time to craft gahzilla.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Response to "go fuck yourself"

What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
April 2020

Classic

Gotta hit up the bathroom V2

twitchquotes: "Give me a second guys," Kripp says. "Gotta hit up the bathroom". He turns down the volume on his microphone, and immediately gives Dex a blank stare. As Dex yips, Kripp stands up out of his chair, saying "This game is ok." at a medium volume. Rania continues streaming, and Kripp walks past her on the way to the bathroom. After taking a few breaths, Kripp walks back to his desk, sits back down at his computer, and resumes his stream.
twitch chat
October 2018
Kripp

I, as a heterosexual man

twitchquotes: I, as a heterosexual man, would never feel attraction to another man. Not even a slim, supple young lad with hyper feminine features in the most endearing cat outfit you could possibly imagine. That doesn't seem attractive to me at all. If you find pictures of men like this, you can just send them to me so I know what to watch out for and avoid.
twitch chat
November 2020

Scary Pepega

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠪⡳⣶⣾⣿⣿⣶⠦⠤⠒⣶⣶⣤⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠪⡻⣿⣀⣶⣶⣶⡤⠬⠙⠛⠃⢤⣭⠖⣢⡀⢄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢚⢿⣿⣿⣯⠴⢛⣭⣽⣽⣕⡉⢜⣵⠾⢿⣿⣄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⢔⣦⣾⣿⣿⣟⢿⣿⡟⠄⠘⣿⣿⡞⣿⡀⢠⡽⣿⣷⡀ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣤⣮⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⡏⣿⠁ ⭕ ⣡⣿⣿⡿⠿ ⭕ ⠅ ⠄⠄⠄⣴⣽⣿⣿⠟⠫⠽⣿⣿⡿⢻⣧⠱⣙⠿⢿⠿⢿⢛⣥⡙⠥⠬⠅⣂⣤⡤ ⠄⢌⣾⣿⣿⡿⣱⠚⠻⣷⣝⢿⣿⣦⣭⣑⣂⣉⣭⣥⣶⣿⣿⣷⣄⣾⣿⠿⠋⢹ ⣜⣿⣿⣿⣿⢱⣿⠄⠸⣦⣭⠓⠪⠭⣛⣛⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣟⣛⣛⠭⢝⣢⠄⢧⢸ ⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⠄⠄⠻⠃⠄⢿⣷⡶⠄⣭⣭⡍⠩⣭⣭⡤⠄⠄⠻⣿⠄⠄⢸ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡸⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠁⠄⠄⠹⠋⠄⠄⠙⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⡠⠎ ⢡⢿⣿⣿⣿⣧⢻⣧⠄⢠⣶⡀⠄⠄⡄⠄⠄⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⢀⣄⠄⠄⢠⡿⠝⠄ ⠄⠩⢿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠻⣧⡙⢿⣿⠄⢰⣿⡄⠄⢀⣿⡄⠄⢀⣾⣿⡷⠄⡩⠊⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠑⢝⢿⣿⣿⣷⣬⣛⠳⢦⣤⣍⣙⣛⣀⣛⣛⣃⣀⡉⢍⠠⠔⠊⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠑⠫⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣬⣭⣭⣭⠭⠭⠙⠂⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
November 2019

Pepe

Text-to-Speech Playing