[Copypasta] I think i need a special vaccine

twitchquotes: 😳 what's this? my heart is beating so fast πŸ’“ I feel dizzy πŸ€ͺ what is this tension in my lower body? πŸ€” I am sweating so much πŸ₯΅ I think i need a special vaccine πŸ† because I have [insert streamer name]virus πŸ€’πŸ€’πŸ€’
twitch chat
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi. I'm a 27 year old Japanese Japamerican (western culture fan for you foreigners). I brand and wrangle cattle on my ranch, and spend my days perfecting the craft and enjoying superior American passtimes. (Barbeque, Rodeo, Fireworks) I train with my branding iron every day, this superior weapon can permanently leave my ranch embled on a cattle's hide because it is white-hot, and is vastly superior to any other method of livestock marking. I earned my branding license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day. I speak English fluently, both Texas and Oklahoma dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about American history and their cowboy code, which I follow 100% When I get my American visa, I am moving to Dallas to work in an oil field to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a cattle wrangler for the Double Cross Ranch or an oil rig operator for Exxon-Mobil! I own several cowboy hats, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I rebel against my elders and seniors and speak English as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond. Wish me luck in America!
July 2019

Trump and Scooby Doo

twitchquotes: "Well Shaggy and Scoobs, you caught the Twitch Chat ghost. Where are Fred and Daphne?" Fred and Daphne appear, their clothes ruffled. Fred pulls off the ghost's hood. "Rit's Rrump!" exclaims Scoobie. "Why'd you do it Trump?" asks Velma. "Because I hate Twitch chat and I would've gotten away with it if it weren't for you meddling kids!"
twitch chat
April 2015
Trump

I hate Twitch Chat

How traders politely decline the second date

I discovered recently if I am on a date and I’m not that interested in a second, all I need to do is start talking about my stocks. They won’t ask for another one then, I won’t have to politely decline.
December 2021

WallStreetBets

I'm leaving this community, jerma can't keep getting away with this

I'm leaving this community, jerma can't keep getting away with this After jerma's recent apology video, it seemed like the only thing he cared about before going live was his looks. He came onto stream and honestly seemed slightly drunk. He proceeded to spend time talking about how fun it was to 'woohoo' death. He used another term, but due to me actually caring about the people here, I decided it's better to censor myself. He did briefly apologize for the Amelia situation, but that twitlonger she wrote really exposed the absolute horror of being stood up and finding your date in bed with the reaper of souls himself. I think the worst part of the apology was how he kept saying "that isn't who I am" but proceeded to fall asleep once again at the end. Also I'm fairly certain he was still on the toilet. I heard a few weird noises. I really hope this psycho gets banned. p.s. I'm starting to think the 'jerma speared and killed a man' conspiracy theory may have had been real.
March 2022
Jerma985

Our most powerful technique - Submode

twitchquotes: "You are Anakin no longer, but Darth Vader. Rise my young apprentince," says Palpatine to the new Darth Vader. "My master, can you teach me how to resurrect the dead through the force?" asks Vader. Trump smirks, "In time, my apprentice, but first you must learn our most powerful technique - Sub Mode."
twitch chat
April 2015
Trump
Text-to-Speech Playing