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There is a bunch of Twitch overlords
twitchquotes:
There is a bunch of Twitch overlords who grow batches of streamers from genetically modified eggs. When these eggs hatch and grow, they are given their first computer and start streaming a Dora the Explorer game. As they grow up, the most popular streamers advance and are given more complex games to stream, from CoD to Hearthstone. Each streamer lives in a small cubicle, and there are hundreds upon hundreds of cubicles on the grounds of the Twitch Headquarters. 
twitch chat
Kripp
Rank 25 Casual
twitchquotes:
( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮Hey Vegeta, what does the scouter say about Kripp's powerlevel? Its over Rank 25 CASUAL!!! ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮
twitch chat
Kripp
The year is 2025. Kripp lies on his deathbed
twitchquotes:
The year is 2025. Kripp lies on his deathbed, the countless years of veganism finally having taken their toll. He struggles to adjust his eyes to the glare of his computer screen, yearning to view his beloved twitch chat one more time. All he sees is degenerate weeb spam. His eyes brim with tears. He begins gasping his final breath, and in his final moments he tells Rania "K"
twitch chat
Kripp
The message can only be posted 10 more times
twitchquotes:
this message can only be posted 10 more times or else serious consequences will commence
twitch chat
Kripp
Dear women who post nudes on reddit.
Stop with the fucking " I bet you'll never guess what's under my dress.."
It's tits. It's always fucking tits.
This is no mystery to anyone, and human anatomy has been the same for over 100k years. Seriously, shut the fuck up. You all do this. Do you really think your tits and asshole are so special that they're going to shift our collective consciousness or something?
"I bet the guys at the gym wonder what's under my yoga pants."
I bet they already know, and if they fucking don't, maybe you shouldn't be at a kid gym for 4 year olds.