[Copypasta] Hey! I noticed you are fucking retarded

Hey! I noticed you are fucking retarded Hey! I noticed you are fucking retarded. I don’t know if you’re new here, so I’ll let you off the hook this time. Saying the most unfunny shit is frowned upon here on this great site, and for good reason. Fucking dumbass, mentally challenged retards do that and, you don’t want to be seen as a spastic little schizo, do you? If I catch you using shitty memes in the future, I’ll be forced to issue a report to a mental hospital. Why should you care, you may ask? Well to begin with, i know your white little ass is gonna get r***d in there, and you don’t want that to happen. Also everyone is going to see your shriveled up balls dangling as a big black man named Requis fucks the shit out of you. If you were to continue the use of retarded wording, I would be forced to personally come and beat the shit out of your little tranny faggit ass. Any further offenses past that would leave me no other option than to pay a hobo to stab you to death with a razor blade. I don’t think I have to explain why you don’t want that. But anyways, no harm done yet! Follow these simple rules and you’ll enjoy your future on the server! Have a blessed (and hopefully retarded free) day, stranger.
July 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

What's the best way to cash out without creating a huge ruckus?

For example, lets just say that I theoretically put $4000 into crypto, watched it quadruple and now I theoretically had $16k in crypto. Now lets imagine that I theoretically put half of that so $8000 into this funny haha dog coin called Shiba Inu or something in August 2020 and just forgot about it cause it's funny to put a lot of money into stupid jokes. But theoretically lets say that it turned to $8 billion in a bit over a year and now I want to cash out and move it to my bank account. How would I theoretically go on about this safely if I theoretically had this much money in crypto, in theory of course.
November 2021

Cryptocurrency

Do you have any thoughts of your own on this matter?

Yeah I read that too. Are you gonna plagiarize the whole thing for us? Do you have any thoughts of your own on this matter? Is that your thing? You come into a thread, you copy some obscure passage and then paste it off as your own idea just to impress some of your "crew" and downvote my friend? See the sad thing about a guy like you is that in 50 years you're gonna start doing some thinking on your own and you're gonna come up with the fact that there are two certainties in life One, you are a talentless and unoriginal hack. And two, you wasted time trying to post other people's thoughts as your own while you could've been honing your skills to be actually creative instead of a thoughtless loser with a paste fetish.
August 2021

Howling Wolf

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠁⠸⢳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠃⠀⠀⢸⠸⠀⡠⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠃⠀⠀⢠⣞⣀⡿⠀⠀⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⡖⠁⠀⠀⠀⢸⠈⢈⡇⠀⢀⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠩⢠⡴⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡶⠉⠀⠀⡸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠎⢠⣇⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⢀⠄⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠏⠀⢸⣿⣴⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣆⣀⢾⢟⠴⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠀⠠⣄⠸⢹⣦⠀⠀⡄⠀⠀⢋⡟⠀⠀⠁⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⠁⢠⠀⣿⠃⠘⢹⣦⢠⣼⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣴⠫⠤⣶⣿⢀⡏⠀⠀⠘⢸⡟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠐⠿⢿⣿⣤⣴⣿⣣⢾⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢣⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣨⣟⡍⠉⠚⠹⣇⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢦⠀⠀⢀⡀⣾⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⠟⣹⣧⠃⠀⠀⢿⢻⡀⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⣦⡀⣸⣆⠀⣾⣧⣯⢻⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠘⣰⣿⣿⡄⡆⠀⠀⠀⠳⣼⢦⡘⣄⠀⠀⡟⡷⠃⠘⢶⣿⡎⠻⣆⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡟⡿⢿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠀⠻⢯⢷⣼⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⡄⡈⢆⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⣿⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⢹⢿⡀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠛⠓⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠼⠇⠁
January 2024

It can only be described as a Twisting Nether

twitchquotes: I gasp in horror as Kripp pulls out his "huge gun". It can only be described as a Twisting Nether. He says "I got lethal now ". Then he topdecks Blizzard and frosts my face. I groan as he grabs my package and whispers "No sniperinos on my stream..." Then he continues to Gorehowl me.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

jeSUS

So, last Sunday my parents made me go to church ,which made me really mad because my parents don't let me play Among Us in church. We took our seats and the priest was up front talking about "salvation" and "holiness" or whatever. Same thing as last week. But then, he said something that really caught me off guard. He spoke of a man who goes by the name of "Jesus." "Jesus." "JeSUS." No way. I could not believe what I was hearing. Endorphins were rushing to my brain and my body began to shiver as I let out a quiet moan. If you didn't catch on by now, the word "Jesus" has "SUS" in it, which is a reference to the popular video game "Among Us." "WHEN THE IMPOSTER IS SUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I screamed louder than I ever have in my life. My words echoed throughout the room for five seconds before fading into complete silence. Everyone was staring at me as I had a huge grin on my face, perfectly replicating the face from the "when the imposter is sus" meme (Google it if you don't know what it is.) They all had this look on their faces as if I had just slaughtered 7,924 Afghanian children. "Why do you all have that look on your faces? Did someone do a Fortnite dance?" And there was still complete silence. I actually had to make sure I wasn't wearing my noise cancelling headphones that I always wear while playing Among Us. I could not believe that not one person in the room was dying of laughter!! "Young man, please be quiet" said the priest. He was literally the one who made the Among Us reference in the first place. What's his problem? "THAT'S NOT VERY WHOLESOME!!!!!!!!!!" This guy was definitely the imposter. There's no way he couldn't be. I Naruto ran faster than anyone has ever Naruto ran before. Even Naruto himself would be proud of me. As I was making my way up to the imposter, the security guard was chasing after me! I had to think fast. After being chased around the room for two minutes, I hastily undid my pants and peed in the security guard's eyes. As he was being blinded by my pee, he was stumbling around and bumped into the wall very hard. A crucifix fell off the wall and impaled his stupid, ugly fat head. He fell and a pool of blood soon formed around him. Everyone in the church was screaming and running out the door. I slammed my hand down on the crucifix, replicating the button you press in Among Us, which drove the crucifix further into his skull. "EMERGENCY MEETING!!!!!!!!!!!" No one laughed. They were too busy screaming to notice. Whatever. I stripped completely naked and went up to the priest. I replicated the Big Chungus pose with 100% accuracy. "You probably don't even use Reddit. That's not very keanu chungus wholesome 100 of you. Go subscribe to r/atheism." The priest had a look of shock on his face when I said that. The kind of face one would make if they caught their beloved child playing Fortnite. He held a cross in front of himself and started talking about "possession" and "demons." He obviously doesn't know how to play Among Us so naturally, I felt bad for him. But he was still the imposter. I grabbed him and threw him across the church, sending him crashing through the window and slammed against the street outside. A car ran over his head, causing his brain and skull fragments to splatter everywhere. Then, I heard sirens and a helicopter flying around above the church. I went upstairs to the roof to check out what was going on. "This is the police! Get down from the roof now or we will shoot!" This guy is so sus, let me tell ya. Obviously, I was not going to listen to an imposter so I was Naruto running around the roof. Bullets from the helicopter were raining down from above but none of them hit me since I was Naruto running so fast. "Dammit, I can't hit him!" I knew I had him beat then. So, I pulled out my gun (I always keep a glock in my foreskin so I can pull the Among Us death animation when I lose my virginity because I know it makes girls horny.) I shot at the helicopter and it started spinning out of control and crashed into the front of the church, causing a huge explosion. The roof started sliding off from the building, which landed on the cop cars and killed 8 cops. This also flung me into the street and I broke my foot, which was very sus. I limped all the way to the woods where I am now hiding and writing this. I will update as soon as I can but I need to get out of here soon because I can hear people looking for me.
September 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Text-to-Speech Playing